If you haven’t heard already, Josh Duhamel – or Fergie’s lapdog – was removed from an aircraft this past Thursday for violating flight protocol. Apparently Josh thinks himself as something of an exception to that whole ‘please turn off electronic devices while we try to get this 150-ton hunk of scrap metal off the ground, OK’ thing because when asked to turn his phone off, he said, ‘No thank you,’ and continued texting.

When Josh – or ‘John,’ as People.com refers to him in the top tab as seen here:

didn’t comply with the steward’s continuous suggestions, then requests, then demands, to turn the phone off, the plane was turned around and Josh was removed by flight staff.

I mean, Josh should know that any variety of things will get you kicked off a plane these days – including being fat – so why would he think that being a douche wouldn’t be one of them? Because even if he didn’t refuse to shut off his mobile, I’m sure they would have figured out another reason to get his smarmy ass off of the aircraft.

You see how Tiger ended up, don’t you?  Tcha.  Come on.

Duhamel wants to make sure that there’re no kids in the picture while he’s still porking other women, ’cause that doesn’t set a good “family example” naturally.

Nah, but really … Josh Duhamel recently sat down for an interview with People magazine where he was asked the obligatory-just-married question of whether or not he and Fergie are going to pump out a litter of kids in the next few hours or so.  Duhamel stated that he does, indeed, want Fergie’s children, but not anytime soon.

The 37 year-old actor and his wife, Stacy “Fergie” Ferguson, are apparently not getting any younger … and he’s not getting any better looking, either, so maybe that means he’ll start reining in that trouser snake of his a little bit more and y’know, settle down some more.  After that, maybe, just maybe, they’ll be able to consider children.  One step at a time, guys, one step at a time.

And if mine eyes do not deceive me, Fergie looks absolutely slamming in this photo.  On second thought, Josh, you better get up on that baby train before Fergie sucks the remaining lifeblood out of you, before you do end up looking more like the Cryptkeeper and before she does leave your philandering at-a-loss-for-words ass.

Creep.

Beet sometimes writes slightly tongue-in-cheek posts like this that show celebs doing everyday things like going to the grocery store, or taking their kids to pick out Christmas trees.

But what Josh Duhamel “picked” out in his car today is just as perfect an example of celebrity humanity as any.

Penelope Cruz, Nicole Kidman and Fergie pose at the LA premiere of NINE.

Also there: Lisa Rinna, Harry Hamlin, Josh Duhamel and Sarah Silverman, straight off the set of the Singles remake, apparently.

So People Magazine is reporting that the stripper who claims she slept with Fergie’s man, Josh Duhamel is doing some interview on Extra to apologize to Fergie for messing with her man. To me, that’s not so interesting because like, duh. That’s what nobody rando people who make horrible claims about celebrities do. They do the press tour, they maybe decide they want to act and wind up doing promotional parties in Grand Rapids or like, whatever. All those Z-List nobody things that attention seeking weirdos do. I don’t particularly think it matters that she’s apologizing to Fergie, who cares? But here’s what killed me when I read the story:

In fact, the media attention given to her claims have hurt her family, if anyone’s. She has two young children.

“My son, he went to a football game last Saturday and he was like, ‘Mom, you’re disgusting. I didn’t know you had sex with him,’ ” she says.

She’s even quit stripping.

“I don’t want to because of my children,” she says. “They asked that I never do it again.”

But was it all worth it? The sex definitely wasn’t, she says. “As far as the best sex? No, I don’t think that was it,” she says.

This woman is a mother?! She has children old enough to go to football games on their own and come home with information about their mother’s having a sex scandal with a major celebrity that’s been splashed all over the Internet and news? Is this really where we’re at? This kid’s life will probably never be the same. His relationship with his mother is permanently tainted by this incident. It’s one thing to know your mother is a stripper, but to know that she’s sleeping with married men on the job, essentially making her a prostitute? If these kids have a relative they can live with, they should.

Anyone who would sacrifice the emotional health of their children to gain a molecule of infamy is disgusting.

Earlier in the week, I told you about Nicole Forrester — stage name:  Delilah — who is claiming that she had sex with Josh Duhamel.  Josh and his new wife Fergie immediately issued one of those stock “She’s a liar” denials that we are so used to hearing.  Well, the pole prodigy is now telling her story on the radio and I believe her.  Click here to watch all three videos of Nicole talking about how she met Josh and how she was approached by the tabs.

The way Nicole tells it, she didn’t know who Josh Duhamel was, but eventually her co-workers clued her in and told her that he was married.  But listen, he was hot, guys.  What’s a girl to do if the guy is hot?  So, she banged him.

Stripper girl also claims that she was approached by the National Enquirer after Josh was bragging on set about screwing a stripper at the club Tattletales.  She resisted telling her story until a $20,000 check was waved under her nose.

Beyond a possibly destroyed marriage, the worst thing is that Nicole’s kids who are 10 and 13 didn’t know that mommy took off her clothes for a living (and sleeps with married dudes!)  Well, they and the rest of the world know it now.  Hopefully she’ll take that check and do good with it.