Break out the hankies, watch for a few ‘Jake is gay’ rumors to fly low, and get some earplugs – because you just know that girlfriend’s going to release a Jake-dedicated song in the coming months.
Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal have called it quits on their two-month-old relationship, and, according to sources, also claim that the couple stopped seeing each other last month. Cripes man, it’s Taylor Swift here. How did we not know. We know, by a random break into song, whenever a generic car parts salesman accidentally looks her way. The people responsible for this big cover-up? Probably the same people behind the Kennedy assassination.
I like Taylor’s virginal and innocent persona a lot – her music, eh, not so much – but the breakup is probably for the best. She seems to write her best songs when she’s been smited, and as you all know, there’s a market for practically everything out there these days. Inquiring minds wanna know, you know?
Sorry about the imminent heartbreak, guys, it must have been rough – but note to Taylor? This is why you don’t let things like this leak after only one date. It’s embarrassing when things go south so quickly, isn’t it?