Fantasia Barrino was in the news last week after overdosing on asprin and sleep medication. At the time I think most people thought it was an accident. Some even blamed her illiteracy, saying that she wasn’t aware that she’d taken more than the recommended dose. Then today an extremely candid interview with Fantasia from her upcoming Behind the Music came out in People where she confirms that not only was the overdose not an accident, but that she’s already started to pull herself out of that dark place where suicide was an option… and guys? I’m wondering now if this whole thing was a publicity stunt to ramp up ratings for her Behind the Music special.
I pulled some of the best quotes from the interview for ya:
“I didn’t have any fight in me. I didn’t care about anything. I just wanted out. At that moment, I wanted out. I wanted it to be over with – all of it, all of that [expletive].”
“I just sat in the closet and looked at the mirror and took all the pills in the bottle. I wanted to go to sleep and just be at peace. I knew exactly what I was doing. You can’t accidentally take a whole bottle of pills.”
“I was tired of people doing me wrong, constantly, over and over again, dealing with my family – my father, dealing with men and their [expletive] – I was tired,” she says. “My head was hurting me. I was over it.”
“My nurse Melanie was a blessing into my life because she didn’t tell me what I wanted to hear. She told me what I needed to hear. And she looked at me and said, ‘You gotta get up, and you’ve gotta get out of here, ’cause you haven’t fulfilled your destiny.’ “
“I realized how people end up in the grave. Because that one moment [snaps her fingers] of just breaking or feeling like I can’t, I can’t go on, it’s too heavy. That was somewhere I don’t ever want to go again.”
It’s not so much Fantasia’s statements that call her honesty into question for me, it’s her statement mixed with her manager’s account of the nights events. They just sound… kinda fake to me. Like, poorly written versions of something that would be a real problem if they happened to someone else:
“Her emotions were extremely low. She’d been crying all day. Fantasia was just numb. Fantasia texted me, saying ‘I love you.’ I wrote back, ‘I love you more.’ Then it hit me. I wrote, ‘You better not do anything or think about doing anything stupid.’ And I left it at that. About 10 minutes later, Fantasia texted me back, and she said, ‘Already did.’ I went into Fantasia’s room and saw her on the floor, and my heart just dropped.”
There are too many elements to this story that sound like a scream for attention from a teenager. The non-prescription drugs taken, taking the pills and then alerting someone employed by her to her situation, the fact that there was a camera crew set to interview her for her Behind the Music special just a week later.
Suicide is something to be taken seriously, so if my speculation is incorrect and Fantasia genuinely was trying to kill herself, thank God she’s getting the help she needs. However, if this suicide attempt is more of a low-budget theatrical production like I suspect it to be, then that’s mad shameful. Not cute.