Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Demi Moore

Love It or Leave It: Demi Moore Looks Good

photo of demi moore ferragamo pictures, photos
This is what Demi wore to Thursday night’s Ferragamo Spring/Summer Runway Collection and VIP dinner in Los Angeles, and I can’t even believe I’m saying this, but she looks good. … Actually, no. She looks great, and it pains me to say so, because before I even saw this picture, my husband and I were kind of mocking her over breakfast this morning.

See, it was all toast and coffee and Carnation Instant Breakfast, and then we got to talking about how Demi’s this fifty-some year-old twit with the mentality of a fourteen-year-old girl (oh, you know, like … of her daughters, maybe?), and basically, it’s because she’s so rich and useless and she’s got all this time on her hands to just be a moron. But wait—that was my husband’s point of view, which I vehemently disagreed with. No, I think Demi’s the way Demi is because Demi’s got some serious issues, emotionally and possibly mentally, as well. We all know Demi’s history with substance abuse and how it dates back even to the eighties, so there’s stuff going on there that we can’t just blame on boredom, you know? Breakfast chat. Love it.

But hey! How about them legs, huh? Because those are some legs, guys. Legs for days.

Demi Moore Was “Shocked” That Ashton Kutcher Filed for Divorce

A photo of Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore

Yeah, I don’t know. “Shocked” doesn’t really seem like the right word here, does it? Like, Demi probably would have been shocked if Ashton had filed for divorce about two years ago, but since they’ve been separated for over a year, and since Ashton has a brand new relationship that’s been going strong for a few months now (Ashton brought Mila Kunis home to Iowa for Christmas, by the way), it just doesn’t seem all that shocking.

But here’s the deal:

Even though they separated more than a year ago, Demi Moore was described as being “shocked” when her estranged hubby Ashton Kutcher filed for divorce last Friday, according to a new report.

Despite this, in just-released photos taken only two days after Kutcher filed papers in Los Angeles Superior Court to formally end his marriage, the Ghost star appeared in good spirits as she shopped with a companion in Los Angeles Sunday.

Moore  – who’s endured a tough year, which included a stint in rehab and estrangement from her three daughters, Rumer, Tallulah and Scout — had been hoping to quietly settle with her cheating husband and then file divorce papers, according to Wednesday’s edition of The New York Post. “Demi had hoped to negotiate a financial settlement quietly,” a source told Page Six, “and then file paperwork afterwards to show the matter had been settled.”

But, the source added, the negotiations got too bogged down and Kutcher — TV’s highest- paid actor — became frustrated and pulled the trigger earlier. “Demi was asking for so much money, and [the negotiation] was dragging on so long, that Kutcher got fed up and filed papers, which means their divorce negotiations will become more public.”

I’m not an Ashton Kutcher fan by any means, but I do kind of feel sorry for him. All he wants to do is get divorced from the wife he cheated on without giving her too much money so he can get married to a brand new wife to cheat on, is that so much to ask for? Poor, poor Ashton.

Demi Moore Totally Wanted That Divorce The Whole Time

A photo of Demi Moore

Oh gosh, you guys, you wouldn’t even believe how happy Demi Moore is that Ashton Kutcher went ahead and filed for divorce. It’s like, beyond happy. Like if happiness was Jupiter, then what Demi’s feeling would be in some whole other galaxy. She’s SO happy.

From TMZ:

Demi Moore planned to divorce Ashton Kutcher from the day she left him in November, 2011 … sources connected with the former couple tell TMZ.

As we first reported … Ashton wanted to give Demi the chance to file herself — a whole dignity thing since he’s the one who was allegedly cheating on her — but he finally got tired of waiting after a year and filed for divorce Friday.

But our sources say Demi was not stalling … there was something going on with some sort of financial issues between the two of them that prevented her from filing … something she was trying to resolve. We’re told Demi never wavered in her resolve to get unhitched.

One final thing. Our sources say Demi is “genuinely happy” now and has no regrets about moving on.

See? She’s wanted to file for divorce for over a year, but she couldn’t, because “there was something going on.” I mean, we’ve all had something going on before, you know? Like yesterday, I meant to pick up some wrapping paper while I was out, but there was something going on and I just forgot. Or a couple of months ago, I really meant to get my wisdom teeth taken out, but there was something going on. It happens, you know? Stuff goes on all the time.

But hey, Demi’s super happy. She’s happy. But seriously, did you hear how happy she is?

Ashton Kutcher Finally Got Sick of Demi Moore’s Sh-t, Filed for Divorce

photo of demi moore and ashton kutcher pictures
From People:

Ashton Kutcher has filed for divorce from Demi Moore.

The papers were filed Friday in Los Angeles Superior Court. Kutcher, 34, citing irreconcilable differences, isn’t seeking any spousal support nor is he asking the court to deny Moore any. The documents also show that because the couple had no children together, child support and visitation are not an issue.

So it’s about one of three things, by my best guess. One, Ashton wants to up and marry his long-time love, Mila Kunis, and he can’t very well do that while he’s still married to Demi Moore; two, Ashton’s sick of being tied to a trainwreck, no matter how far removed; or three, he’s just one of those procrastinating type of people, and if that’s the case, that shit really gets on my nerves.

Oh, wait, right. No, the fact that he cheated on Demi to begin with, abused her trust and feelings, and then rebounded with chicks mere weeks after being kicked out of his house. No, you’re totally right—that’s the kind of shit that really gets on my nerves.

Demi might be an unstable dumbass, but Ashton Kutcher is the devil, guys. And a stupid devil, at that.

Demi Moore Was Dumped for Dry-Humping Lenny Kravitz the Other Night

photo of demi moore drunk thumbs up terry richardson pictures
From the NY Post:

Page Six can reveal Vito, 26, broke things off with Demi, 50, after she arrived in Miami last week to party with the stars at the busy art fair.

One source told us, “Vito has worked very hard to be taken seriously in the art business, and doesn’t want to be seen as somebody who dates celebrities. He hated having photographers follow him around after word got out about him and Demi.”

The source continued, “And Vito wasn’t too happy that Demi flew down to party at Art Basel while he was working to build his business. It was a distraction he didn’t need while all the big collectors were in town.”

We exclusively revealed Moore and Schnabel, the dapper son of acclaimed artist Julian Schnabel, hit it off at Naomi Campbell’s lavish birthday bash for her lover Vladimir Doronin in Jodhpur, India in early November.

But things cooled off dramatically in Miami, with the pair staying apart and exchanging glances at a bash for art collectors’ Web site at Soho Beach house on Wednesday.

The breakup didn’t appear to faze Moore, who hung out with Lenny Kravitz and later headed out for a girls night at Le Baron at Jelsomino with pals including Stacy Kiebler until 3:30 a.m.

No, no, no. I’m sorry, but this young dude broke up with Demi Moore because of the partying with Lenny Kravitz and company, because I can’t, for the life of me, bring myself to think that this is how Demi Moore unwinds and releases to lament the loss of a fleeing relationship that was doomed from the start anyway. Because if it is, then Demi Moore is no different than every other dumped nineteen-year-old girl who gets all sloppy drunk and heads out to some bar to get even sloppier drunk so she can sing “Man! I Feel Like a Woman!” three or four or twelve times during a karaoke sesh because the karaoke people pity her and are actually kind of afraid to encourage her to actually sing anything else because God knows what’s going to happen next.

No, I choose to believe that Demi is just fun and cool and not-at-all out of control, and when the young man she was dating realized just how cool and amazing she is, he decided that he just couldn’t hack it and live up to the likes of what was going through Lenny Kravitz’s mind when he was being dry-humped by Demi Moore. … Because Demi Moore’s just way too classy for any other options to be real, right?

Demi Moore is Probably Definitely Doing Whip-Its Again

So hey! The photo above, as well as the rest in the gallery? Well. They show Demi Moore acting all crazy at the Chanel Beachside Barbecue last night, and when she wasn’t too busy spreading her legs and chair-dancing, she was eating her hair. And hanging all over a mostly-embarrassed-looking Lenny Kravitz. And possessing the largest pupils known to man.

Take this photo, for example:

photo of demi moore ass dancing pictures chanel bbq pic
I .. what even is this? I’ll tell you what this is—this is Demi Moore, being a hot-ass mess and not caring that she was going to be professionally photographed, by a professional photographer, and not some buck-toothed, undercover mole with a camera on their iPhone. And that’s some bizarre shit right there, guys. I’d ask “Who intentionally wants people to see them like this?” but I’m afraid you know the answer just as well as I.

[Images removed on request]

Demi Moore Has A New Boyfriend, Maybe!

A photo of Demi Moore

From People:

Actress Demi Moore is dipping her toe back in the dating world – and she still likes ‘em young, according to new reports. The New York Post‘s Page Six column reports that Moore, 50, is quietly dating art world scion Vito Schnabel, 26.

Schnabel, an art dealer, is the son of painter and director Julian Schnabel. He and Moore were reportedly “dancing and grinding all over each other” at a party in Jodhpur, India,thrown by supermodel Naomi Campbell for the 50th birthday of her billionaire boyfriend Vladimir Doronin, according to the paper’s account.

The blooming romance comes a year after her split after six years of marriage with husband Ashton Kutcher, 34. Kutcher is now dating his That 70s Show costar Mila Kunis, 29. Sources have told PEOPLE that the relationship has left Moore “jealous and frustrated.””

Vito Schnabel is no stranger to beautiful women: When he was 21, Schnabel reportedly dated supermodel and actress Elle Macpherson. He has also been linked with actress Liv Tyler.

Ok, let me tell you why this is confusing. While this story came from People, which is definitely one of the most trustworthy sources for gossip, it looks like it was originally reported in the New York Post, which is not as trustworthy. And there’s also a conflicting report over on Radar that says that Demi’s daughters are “begging her to get over Ashton.” According that to that story, Demi won’t stop talking about him, and she’s making the divorce proceedings really hard. It seems like that story is more in line with other things we’ve heard, but, you know, People is saying she’s got a new dude.

So what’s up, friends?