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Ciara

What’s with celebrity pregnancy photo shoots?

ciara

Look, pregnancy is awesome, ladies. You’re growing a baby in your body! You look fantastic! You’re glowing! No, you’re not fat – you’re going to be a mom! Life is so cool!

But seriously, why in the hell do so many celebrity ladies feel the need to do the whole “sensual pregnancy” photo shoots? Honestly, it’s out of control. Ciara‘s is sorta modest as, you know, she actually has clothes on, but really? I don’t really need to see this shit from her or anyone else. The whole “hold your belly while you look off into the distance or close your eyes as if in some kind of bliss” thing is just… weird and slightly creepy.

That’s not to say that Ciara and all of these other women who do these pictures aren’t beautiful and that their pregnancy isn’t memorable for them, but that’s the key: FOR THEM. If you wanna do a photo shoot like this, knock yourself out! Get prints and hang them in your own private residence. The bizarre magazine fixation on features like this is just so confusing.

Ciara’s photos are for W magazine – and if you wanted to have less faith in her as a human being and future parent, keep in mind that she’s BFF with Kim Kardashian these days and has been asking her for advice on motherhood:

I believe in allowing your child to be who they want to be—as long as they want to be something great.”

That piece of parenting wisdom, she says, comes courtesy of Kardashian, with whom she’s traded tips on “everything from breastfeeding to how a stroller works.”

“You don’t know your child until they get here, you don’t know their personality,” Ciara says. “There is a lot of learning to do. I loved that advice.”

Oh, brother. I mean, yeah, it’s good advice, but it’s KIM KARDASHIAN we’re talking about.

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Billy Crystal, WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO YOUR FACE??

Billy Crystal, WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO YOUR FACE??

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pharrell-hat

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Lady+Gaga+2013+MTV+VMA

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vampira plan 9 outer space

She looks so pretty. So sane. Please let me like you again, Gaga. Please. (Note: this was written before her performance. Who knows how I’ll feel after I see that.)

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