18Quotables: Charlize Theron Judges You for Your Hello Kitty Fashion

“I’m pretty amazed by Hello Kitty. I see so many women in their 30s walking around in Hello Kitty shit and nobody is concerned for them. It’s the one iconic teenage symbol that seems okay for women in their 30s? The world seems to not have an issue with it.”

Charlize Theron reveals that if you’re an adult in a Hello Kitty shirt, you’re not ok.

I was going to say that she’s being really judgey here, but I actually kind of get where Charlize is coming from on this one. See, here in the South, and you other Southern people can back me up on this one or else alert me that this is a more national trend, people are really into Looney Tunes. I can’t tell you how many grown ass women I’ve seen in a Tweety Bird shirt, and I’ve honestly seen more than one person with a tattoo of that Tasmanian Devil. I don’t get it, I really, really don’t.

But what do you guys think? Does Charlize need to back off, or do you think there’s something a little off about adults obsessed with things like Hello Kitty?

December 18, 2011 at 7:00 am by Emily

3Makeup Tip: Don’t Apply Eyeliner Underneath Your Eyes

Sure enough! Charlize Theron can, and very occasionally does, look awful. No, I know. If I hadn’t seen photographic proof, I wouldn’t have believed it either.

What is going on here? Did someone in the New York Times building make Charlize cry? Because that eye makeup is horrible.

Here is a makeup tip from the pros: “don’t overblend eyeliner under the lower lash line.”

Unless you’re in a screamo band. In that specific case, your blatant misuse of guyliner might make you look like Jared Leto. (But under-eye mascara will only make you look like Ray Liotta. I’m sorry, but it’s true.)

There. You’re welcome.

Also. I have only a few pet peeves, and here they are: one, men in ponytails. Two, eyeliner-under-the-eye. Three, using a suit jacket as some kind of shawl. Did Charlize not have time to put both arms all the way into the sleeves? Come on.

Yes. Yes, I like those shoes. But it is 36 degrees in New York City today, so put those cute little toes away, Theron. Lady, this is sock weather.

I will accept your apologies, Charlize, but only if they are handwritten and delivered in-person.

(Images [obviously!] via Buzzfoto.)

December 11, 2011 at 10:30 am by Jenn

3Check Out the Red Band Trailer for Young Adult

So it’s totally frightening how uncomfortable Charlize Theron made me during the whole entire forty-five seconds of this (NSFW due to language) new trailer. Seriously, like, I know people who act like this. Frequently.

But enough about that. I cannot wait to see this movie. We’ve talked it up here enough, and now the ball’s in your court, folks – are you going to spend the dough to see this in theaters, or wait ’til it’s in the bargain rental section at Blockbuster?

November 29, 2011 at 3:30 pm by Sarah

2Quotables: Charlize Theron Has Never Been Single

“I’ve never been single,” she says in the December issue of Vogue magazine, regarding her split last year from Irish actor Stuart Townsend.

“This is the first time in my life. From the time I was nineteen, I’ve been in relationships, literally gone from one to the other within a month.”

—Charlize Theron talks relationships, via Radar (this month’s Vogue is just full of quotables!).

Why, hello, there, Serial Monogamy!

This is kind of a tricky quote, to be sure, but I really do feel for Miss Theron. I think I have managed to stay coupled for most of my young adult life, and whatever that quirk says about me, it doesn’t necessarily indicate a weakness in character. But losing your partner is so, so difficult, and for a long time you will not feel competent, and it can be awful to sit alone and try to take inventory of yourself. Of course Theron will use singlehood to develop a much more powerful sense of identity.

Meanwhile, Zoe Saldana—that’s right, Uhura herself!—is reportedly single for the first time in 11 years, having broken a lengthy engagement to Keith Britton. Ugh, sad.

November 17, 2011 at 4:30 am by Jenn

8Quotables: Charlize Theron Wants to Kill Kristen Stewart

“She just turned 21. She’s a child. When I think about myself at 21, I had just done The Devil’s Advocate, and Keanu [Reeves] had paparazzi following him and Al Pacino said this thing to me: ‘If I knew that my life would be under this kind of scrutiny, I would have never become an actor.’?” And I thought, Wow. I couldn’t comprehend it. And Kristen is just living this to the max and still has a sense of humor about it. There’s this really lovely quality about her that just doesn’t give a f*ck. A lot of people say they don’t, but then they go home and cry and pop a Xanax. Kristen actually doesn’t give a f*ck. That’s what’s so refreshing about her. I’m looking forward to killing her and taking her beauty. That’s what happens, right?”

- Charlize Theron describes her love and admiration and plans for the eventual murder of Kristen Stewart to Vogue.

Have I mentioned how beautiful and perfect Charlize Theron is lately? Because she really, really is. However, the idea that Charlize would actually suggest, however jokingly, that she wants to kill Kristen Stewart to take her beauty is appalling to me. I’m not saying that Kristen isn’t pretty, because of course she is, but … it’s Charlize Theron …

November 14, 2011 at 5:30 pm by Emily

1Watch This: the Trailer for Jason Reitman’s ‘Young Adult’ Is Here!

Oh man, oh man, oh man. This trailer looks so good, right?

Charlize Theron stars in Young Adult as Mavis Gary, an insufferable “young adult” fiction writer who returns to her Minnesota hometown hoping to make her old high school boyfriend fall in love with her (thanks, IMDb). And! It co-stars my dream man, Patrick Wilson, who plays the guy Mavis can’t have. And! Patton Oswalt plays the unwilling wingman, an acquaintance from high school who obviously puts up with Mavis’s ish because she’s so darn cute and catty.

I have totally high hopes for this one you guys—like, even higher hopes than I had for One for the Money. For one thing, anyone who’s watched Arrested Development or “Between Two Ferns” knows Charlize has done her career a major disservice, because she has mad comedic timing. Patton Oswalt I’m actually so-so on—I know it isn’t fair to hold King of Queens against him, but I just do—but since he is a Career Nerd, I have to stand with him in solidarity. Then there’s Patrick Wilson, whose filmography is a veritable Rosetta’s Stone of What? Hngh. Love him.

But most importantly, this flick is a Jason Reitman joint. It’s great to see him again paired with breakout screenwriter Diablo Cody (they made Juno together), and this movie could be infinitely more affable. Who wants to see a 15-year old act like she’s 35, anyway? I’d much rather see a 35-year old act like she’s 15. Now you’re speakin’ my language, Cody.

October 7, 2011 at 4:30 am by Jenn