Before I even try to discuss this interview with you (which, to be honest, is pretty self-explanatory if you simply read the headline, as it’s basically all about Ben Affleck‘s relationship with Jennifer Lopez, or, you know, The High Point of Ben Affleck’s Career), I have to ask you something: is it me (and it very well could be; I made my Thanksgiving grocery shopping list a few minutes ago and my eyes are still all f-cked up and agog at how long the bitch is) or does Ben Affleck kind of look like what Fred Flintstone would look like if a) Fred Flintstone were a person and b) Fred Flintstone were twenty pounds thinner than Fred Flintstone normally is? Because I look at the photo above, in particular, and all I can think is FRED FLINTSTONE FRED FLINTSTONE FRED FLINTSTONE. And it’s kind of crazy, to be honest. FLINTSTONES. MEET THE FLINTSTONES. Damn. Sorry about that.
Anyway, here’s the part that you probably care about, because it’s the reason you skimmed through all of the Flintstones nonsense (THEY’RE THE MODERN STONE-AGE FAMILY) to get to this point.
Here’s Ben Affleck, to GQ, on how people hated him when he dated J. Lo:
“At the time, I knew on some level, ‘This is insane,’ What was that guy’s name who killed his wife and dumped her off the side of a boat? Peterson. I remember thinking he actually gets slightly better treatment than I do in the press. At least they had to say ‘alleged killer.’ Unfortunately there’s an aspect of that that’s like one of those fights you see on YouTube where one of them falls down and then a bunch of people who were standing around come over and kick the person. They don’t know them, they have no involvement in the fight, but they recognize a moment that they can get a free shot in, and for some people it’s just too much to resist. And that was definitely me at that point. I was the guy. I was the designated person to loathe.”
Yawn. Yes, everybody hated Ben Affleck just because he was sleeping with Jennifer Lopez. I’m sure it totally had nothing to do with the smug smarminess emanating from Ben that Ben himself was oblivious to.
Moving on—Ben comparing Jennifer Lopez and her massive fame to test-driving a luxury car:
“There were ways I did contribute to it, still kind of naively. Like these car dealerships would often say, ‘Hey, do you want to drive around a car? Go take it as long as you like. You can drive this Rolls-Royce for nothing, for free.’ The Boston kid in me thought, ‘This is great! What a deal! I can just drive this car around. Let my friends drive it.’ But then this image of a young guy in a Rolls-Royce was very off-putting to people. Probably be off-putting to me now if I saw it. And I didn’t quite have the wherewithal to be smart about that at the time.”
“Let my friends drive it”? I sure hope he’s kidding about that bit.
And last, how Ben Affleck recovered from the beating he took from the public after test-driving the very sleek, very hot luxury car that ultimately ended up with a younger, hipper driver who’s an undeniably better dancer:
“I think I just ran away. You can only handle so much. I moved for a while to this place in Georgia that I have, was able to get away, by and large, from stuff. Come up with a plan for how to do something with my life that doesn’t put me in the crosshairs of this sort of thing.”
So. Who out of you *still* dislikes Ben Affleck for his smug, smarmy disposition? Because I know that I’m still part of that club, and it didn’t even take a relationship with Jennifer Lopez to put me there.