You know, I’m kind of really torn between whether I think Kate Upton’s totally hot, or whether Kate Upton just has a totally hot body. Because she’s gone and scored a spread in Vogue Italia, and to do that, one really must be extraordinarily beautiful, and Kate … well, she’s cute. With a banging bod. And she doesn’t really do high fashion all that well, because she doesn’t really have a Cocaine Kate kind of face, you know?
Take these photos, for example. They’re hot. They’re completely and totally hot. But are they seriously for real? I mean, in one of the pictures (you can check them out in the gallery), Kate’s entire tit is hanging out of her dress. I mean, f-cker is OUT. It’s not a demure little nipslip, and it’s not a “Woops! I’m trying to keep it all in, here!”—her TIT is OUT of the DRESS. And in another photo, she’s reclining on a chair, in a leather all-in-one, and she’s spread-eagle.
So in short, OK. If gangly tits all hanging out of clothing is the new high-fashion, then yes. These photos of Kate Upton for Vogue Italia are right on the money. But if not? Well. The joke’s on somebody; I just can’t, for the life of me, figure out who.