Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Which Actor Has a Crazy Small Penis?

Although this supposedly had nothing to do with their recent breakup, this A list movie actress told many of her friends that when she was dating her A list movie actor boyfriend that he had the smallest peen she had ever seen on a guy. Like so small that when he did not trim that she had trouble seeing the stump in the bushes if you know what I mean.

This one comes from Crazy Days and Nights, and while a slew of recent break ups in Hollywood points to several different possibilities, you gotta hope that the allegations our subject has a particularly tiny wang aren’t true.

From CDAN:

Although this supposedly had nothing to do with their recent breakup, this A list movie actress told many of her friends that when she was dating her A list movie actor boyfriend that he had the smallest peen she had ever seen on a guy. Like so small that when he did not trim that she had trouble seeing the stump in the bushes if you know what I mean.

The obvious guess is Bradley Cooper, what with his recent split from Renee Z. and all, but I’m one of those people who kinda believe that she never saw his penis. Like, ever.

Other possible options are Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel (although that all depends on whether or not you think Jess counts as A-list) or even Mila and Macaulay. I would actually buy this blind as Scarlett and Ryan, but they were married and the folks in question supposedly never got past the BF/GF stage.

Any guesses? Any personal experiences with Bradley, Justin or Mack that can help us disqualify them?

12 CommentsLeave a comment

  • When the hell did Macaulay become an A-list actor? And I wouldn’t give a rat’s tiny ass if Bradley Cooper or Ryan Reynolds had a tiny peen, i’d still do em both

  • My first thought was immediately Bradley Cooper. Or could be Justin. His penis is defintely small if you remember Britney making that hand gesture showing how big it is.

  • Hopefully, it was in the flacid state at the time. It still could be Cooper because it seems that men don’t care who sees them naked. If he spent the night at Renee’s making cookies and having pillow fights, he’d still probably take his clothes off at some point and walk around whether it be at shower time or something. Or wacking off to hot man-on-man docu-dramas for grown-ups. (The censor wouldn’t let me use the word that starts with a “p” and ends with an “n” and contains an “o” and “r”)

  • My sister Lydia briefly dated Bradley in New York years ago, it would never have worked out because my sister’s a bitch. But she did tell me when I was drooling over some photo of Bradley that he has a very nice, very thick penis and he knows how to use it. So I guess it’s not tiny…(she would have told me because that’s kind of mean girl that she is…lol)

  • I wonder if any of the celebs can dwarf Jack Morley In the tiny dick department. Jack has a whopping 3 inch erection. You’d have to be doing Kegal’s on steroids to feel that bad little boy. GOOGLE “jack morley penis” and see for yourself.

  • it obviously taylor lautner i mean come he went out with taylor swift, selena gomez, and bella won’t even go out with him soo he’s my guess

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