Oh Robert Pattinson. Though I’ve never seen Twilight (and quite honestly, probably WON’T EVER), I still know of your sparkly, effervescent, vulva-swooning ways that are apparently appealing to those on both sides of the fence. And boyfriend? Though you were a total manly-man in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, your metro ways are slowly emerging, and I’m starting to believe the fuss that you, yourself, might be interested in those on both sides of the fence, too. There is, of course, nothing wrong wit hthis, but it definitely lends some credence to the rumors that Kristen Stewart is a lesbian, and you’re her cover. And if she is? Boy oh boy I will be, too. (For her, guys. Just for her. And maybe a few choice others – HAVE YOU VOTED?)
Patty on Twilight mania and the afterglow:
“When this is over, the media will lose interest [in the relationship]. There’ll be nothing to say. It won’t fit into a headline anymore. It won’t fit into a template.”
On his real-life love, Kristen Stewart:
“Kristen is very focused on being an actress. I mean, that’s what she is—she’s an actress. Whereas I—I just don’t really know. … She’s cool. Even before I knew her I thought she was a really good actress. Like, I saw Into the Wild, and I thought she was really good in that. I still think there are very few girls in her class that are as good as she is.”
On his favorite co-star of all time, the namesake elephant in Water for Elephants:
“She was the best actor I ever worked with in my life. I cried when the elephant was wrapped. I never cried when anyone else was wrapped.”
On becoming anonymous in the public eye while visiting a random bar in Texas:
“No one recognized me or anything. And I was like, Ah, this is really cool, sitting there eating chicken wings and stuff.
On his really fucking awful taste in sitcoms and televised shows:
“I never change the channel in my trailer. I just watch reruns of House of Payne and Two and a Half Men. I love Cops—I think it’s my favorite TV show… God, I sound like such a loser.”
My parents are big Cops fans. And I? Am not. Whenever I talk to them on the phone and they – for some reason – think that I need to know that they’re watching Cops, I totally cringe. Though I love my parents, they’ve got really fucking awful taste in television, too.
Congratz, Patz – you’ve slipped a notch or five on the hotometer – just because of that whole Cops thing.