A source at the Global Grinder spoke out earlier this week to acknowledge rumors that Kim Kardashian is the latest celebrity vying for the part of Lara Croft in the Tomb Raider series. The source states:
“Kim is wanted to play a far more comic-strip version of Lara, which would be shot in 3-D and aimed at a teen audience.”
Whoa. 3-D Kim Kardashian tits and booty? I’m not sure the world is quite ready for something as amazing as that … it’d be like looking then sun in its face, or talking one-on-one with whoever your maker is. Retinas would be burned out by the sheer magnitude of such ostentation, third-world countries would crumble, and the governments of mega-magnate nations would founder.
And you. Are you ready to see such amazing sights at such an early juncture in your mere mortal life?