Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Turns Out There’s One Bitch Cesar Millan Can’t Tame

Ceasar and Wife Split

Sad news for fans of love: The Dog Whisperer Cesar Millan and his wife Ilusion have decided to call it quits. Ceser let his rabid following of weirdos, housewives and Kathy Griffin in on the unfortunate news via his website:

We are sad to announce that after 16 years of marriage we have decided to file for divorce. The decision was made after much consideration and time. We remain caring friends, and are fully committed to the co-parenting of our two boys.

Well, this is like Al and Tipper all over again! But hey, if they’re not happy, then it’s the best thing to do. But I do have one little gripe here: Why do people always use “we are sad to announce…” as the intro to their divorce announcement? It’s like… No you’re not sad. At least you shouldn’t be. You’re officially ending a failed marriage. I’m sure that that had to suck, but shouldn’t you be psyched you’re getting a divorce? Who cares! Don’t be sad! You’ll move on, the public will move on, this is a great thing. I mean, it’s not like you’re Lamar and Khloe. If those two split up, that would be devastating.

28 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Even though I love Cesar Milan and his ways with dogs, I’ve got to give it to you, Great Headline!

  • Agree, great headline. But the announcements don’t bother me too much — it might be a relief, but it’s probably still sad.

  • Agreed! I love reading your website esp for the headlines. This is one of your finest! You rock

  • I’m the lone one out, the headline sucks… but what can I say, at least you’re staying true to form.

  • clever headline and all but seriously divorce is sad. Most marriages, you like each outher at some point and sometimes even when you can’t stay married, you care about each other. I know several couples who still love each other but they aren’t in love with each other. Divorce is the end of one of the most important relationships in your life. it’s sad that it’s ending at least a little in most cases.
    Not trying to hate, I think you’re great (see what I did there)

  • Headline was brillz, Molly, but I’m a little disappointed in you for skipping the obvious “I guess their love was just an Ilusion.”

  • Yes, funny headline. But Molis, sounds like you have never been married or divorced. A divorice is so horrible it’s like a death. Especially when there are children involved, as these two have. And celebrity kids. Imagine being the kid of a celebrity and having your classmates showing you all this stuff about your parents’ online. Speaking from experience, even when you are the one who desperately wants out, a divorce is still one of the worst things that can happen to you in life, period. Hope you’ll never have to experience one.

  • I bet Ilusion had it with his scruffing her neck and going, “SSST!” every time he came and found dinner not ready.

  • … Every time he came [home] and found dinner not ready.

    Good heavens.
    I apologize.

  • There’s One Bitch Cesar Millan Can’t Tame


    Because she’s the pack leader and Cesar is her follower.

    Guess what? the follower is gonna missing the pack leader.

    Now the leader took away his kids, he’s left alone and will probably suffer from separation anxiety.

    He should have put his head low to her, showing his soft belly in the most respectful & submissive way. One day in the future, the pack leader would give him a chance to re-join the pack again… maybe…

  • she was a bitch in a bad way. saw her on episodes and she had no joy and she is fat.
    they started dating at her insistence, not the way its supposed to start for a person like cesar.
    and i dont like his new girlfriend either. too dumb and nervous. and i saw him treat her bad in a show so that one wont last either.
    cesar i love you. get an american down to earth woman.