Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Liv Tyler is No Longer Liv Tyler

photo of liv tyler on the cover of tatler magazine

The fuck happened to the girl’s face? It looks like it could be one of the following things: a) She’s gotten some kind of jaw-reduction surgery, which resulted in a really unfortunate case of what I call “weak chin-ness,” b) She hasn’t washed her nose, mouth or jaw since Armageddon was released, or c) Really bad photoshopping ensues once again.

I’m going to have to go with option C here. But option B still sounds pretty palatable, considering that’s exactly what it looks like.

The always-refreshingly-beautiful Liv recently appeared on the cover of UK’s Tatler magazine, and she should be pissed at what the photo editors have done to her lovely, impish face. She also claims that she’s a really poor dater and doesn’t do it that often at all:

After separating from her husband Royston Langdon of the band Spacehog seven years ago, Liv Tyler seems in no hurry to get hitched again.

“I fall in love once in a blue moon,” the 32-year-old actress and model wistfully informs Tatler.

She adds that her friends have tried to persuade her to go out on dates, but she will have none of it. “I wouldn’t be capable of having a casual fling,” she says. “I’m far too sensitive, and I just wouldn’t have any pleasure from it.”

Looks like you also wash your face once in a blue moon, too, lady. What’s your addy? I’ll send you some of this really fabulous soap I made a few months ago. You’ll totally dig it, although I’m totally kidding. About me making soap.

More photos in the gallery of Liv not looking like she dove face-first into a bowl of chocolate ice cream and dust.

Well … Kind of.

23 CommentsLeave a comment

  • it seems that you’re constantly writing about how people look. it’s pretty trite and misogynistic, especially considering that this blog is the sister site of a feminist blog. please think of new topics, try to write in complete sentences, and stop cursing so much. it is distracting and it is not good writing.

  • Mary – bravo – I have long been confused with these folks running a feminist site with one hand and trashing women on looks and weight with the other. Totally creepy.

      • Agreed!

        This critical writing concerning appearance is so tiresome and catty. Liv Tyler is and always will be a beautiful woman. This style of writing is boring, uninspiring, and downright juvenile. Yet another disappointing post from Evil Beet today.

  • I agree as well, but I’m not that surprised. Zelda Lily is an example of wikipedia feminism. If the writers have any training in feminist theory, it is not apparent, as they seem to have no idea what they’re doing. They don’t engage critically with issues, they just get misguidedly dogmatic about things that piss them off and cover that shit in a cloak they call ‘feminism’. It’s an embarrassment.


    It seems that Emily is following in Sarah’s strong tradition of using words without knowing what they mean. Case in point: “[r]eally bad photoshopping ensues once again”.

    Dear Emily: “ensues” means ‘results’ or ‘terminates’. Sub either of those synonyms into the sentence above, and you’ll see that what you’ve written doesn’t make sense.

    • Once again, H calls it wrong again. H has got all answers when it comes to being a snarky, unwanted bitch, but doesn’t have basic reading comprehension skills. If you read, Sarah clearly wrote this post. Secondly, nowhere in this article did the writer rip Liv Tyler. The whole thing had to do with bad photoshop attempts. Read, asshole before you comment. It’ll make you look far less stupid.

      oh and subbing your halfassed definition would make sense – really bad photoshopping (ensues) results once again.

    • I should qualify that — it doesn’t make sense in the context of the sentence structure employed above, but it could make sense if ‘results’ is the intended usage and part (c) was re-written to stand alone. It’s still hella-awkward in any case.

      • Dear Anonymous, thank you for pointing out that it was Sarah, and I apologize to Emily for mistakenly attributing this piece of garbage of a post to her.

        I find it ironic that you took the time to tell me I don’t have “basic reading comprehension skills” and then immediately assumed that I was commenting on Liv Tyler getting “ripped” in this post.

        Where did I say that? I was agreeing with the general sentiment as stated by those commenting before me – it’s quite sickening that this site is so focused on superficial aspects of the presentation of the female form all while calling itself the sister-site to a supposedly feminist blog. The truth is, the editors here get to choose what to post, and they choose to focus on women’s appearances. To say that this is a threat about photoshop is to ignore that this gimmick allowed Sarah to justify poking fun at Liv’s appearance whether it be due to photoshop or not.

        Finally, for someone who posts anonymously you seem quite emotionally invested in this post. Interesting.

  • ohmigod. you guys are TOO much.

    i have complained on this site prior, but these complaints about this post are STUPID. firstly, remember where you are. you’re not reading some granola publication full of love for all mankind – you’re reading a GOSSIP site. by its nature, superficial.

    liv tyler DOES look like shit on the cover. its fairly obvious someone got a little too excited with the blend tool. they did such a poor job of it, it DOES look like liv hasn’t washed her face – i don’t see the issue. i’m realizing there are some of you who just post to bash and utilize some of that fabulous vocabulary from your english course last year.

    i think you should find a more pure, and at least nominally serious website. perhaps politically slanted. i think you’d have more fun competing with your holier then thou statement in the comment section with like minded folks.

  • sorry. i didn’t take an english course last year …. lack of foresight on my part.

  • like she looks totally like dissgusting on the cover of that mag….and she is one hot momma in real life

    we should not allow ourselves to be mutated by photoshop it ain’t cool her publicist needs to be shot!!!

    hope you notice the hint of sarcasm and poor english…..hehehe
    do i get an c minus????…snort

  • Back to the original point – her face looks odd because of the uneven light and the camera angle – they just didn’t do a good job of photographing a very lovely woman. You’d think that the pros could do better than this.

  • I’m inclined to believe it’s airbrushing– which she has no control over. She has always seemed to be an incredibly strong woman who refused to bend to Hollywood standards. I remember reading a gossip post- not sure what site, may have been here- where she flat out refused to lose weight to gain more movie roles. She said she had a healthy weight (and she did) and she wasn’t going to torture herself over some director’s idea of beauty. I’ve loved her ever since.