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9Jessica Biel’s Newest Movie Takes a Powder

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I am positively floored to hear this, but Jessica Biel’s new movie about the stripper with a heart, Powder Blue, is going direct to DVD.  I don’t understand how such a talent as Jessica can be put on the Blockbuster shelf over and over again.

She has another movie, Easy Virtue, that is set for limited release in May.  If it actually happens, this will be her first time on the big screen in over two years.

Personally, I maintain high hopes for Nailed, the cinematic (maybe!) masterpiece out for release later this year.  A fascinating plot in which the main character (Biel) has a nail lodged in her head that causes her to flirt with Jake Gyllenhaal.  How insulting is it to be part of a production where the storyline involves a woman who has to be impaled by a piece of hardware to show any interest in you?  Anyway, sounds like a blockbuster for sure.

May I suggest that Jessica needs a change of pace?  A stripper movie, a movie titled Easy Virtue, a movie titled Nailed.  We get it Jess-you’re sexy.  You’ve got to either go lesbian or get into a Holocaust movie if you want to advance this fledgling career of yours forward.

April 27, 2009 at 9:53 am by Wendie
Filed Under: Jessica Biel

9 Responses to “Jessica Biel’s Newest Movie Takes a Powder”

  1. lolly says:

    i think she should cheat on justin with joey fatone. that would get people’s attention again.

  2. hannah says:

    easy virtue came out here in the UK ages ago!
    it was really good :)
    shame she was in it haha

  3. Donkey Punch says:

    She was insane to the take the roll in the first place. Her massive ego actually thought she wouldn’t be making a “Showgirls” kind of movie?

    Who wants to see her plastic face and man arms anyways? Sorry but I don’t like women that have better biceps than I do.

  4. Donkey Punch says:

    Correction: role instead of roll, lol.

  5. Oxymoron says:

    Ugh. Good. I hope the rest of her movies to straight to DVD too. She is just awful.

  6. Oxymoron says:

    Whoa my avatar just changed.

  7. whysoserious says:

    fuk! Why so hateful? She actually has acting talent..I think it actually sux this movie isn’t getting a wide release. It has 3 Acadamy Award winning actors in it giving amazing performances.
    Bitches!

  8. whysoserious says:

    Hey! Where’d my original post go?!
    Basically, why are you all so hateful towards jessica?! I was looking forward towards this movie. It has 3 f’n Acadamy Award winning Actors in this movie!

  9. whysoserious says:

    oops..my bad.

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