Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin Cross That Line They Swore They Never Would



After swearing that they’d never walk a red carpet together, Gwyn and Chris are working on plans to appear together at the Oscars later this month.  And this has truly convinced me that all the “troubled marriage” rumors are false.  Because if you attend awards shows together, that is the number one sign of a strong union.  For real.

I could never be a part of a Hollyweird couple.  How do you think this conversation went?  “Listen, I know we promised we’d never be photographed together, but people are talking about the fact that we’re never on the same continent at the same time.  My publicist was talking to your manager and they feel that we really need to consider doing this project.  Our likability ratings are nil right now.  This could really help us!  Could you stop working on your stupid, fucking GOOP site for one second and talk to me?”

These two never really seem to be a couple except when cranking out biblically named children, but rumors of a rift strengthened last month when Martin was hanging with Brit singer, Aleesha Dixon.  He offered her a ride on his private jet.  I think that’s Britcode for blow job but I’m not sure.

The picture of the happy couple is from 2005.  Aleesha Dixon, just because.

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