Today's Evil Beet Gossip

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Mick Jagger used to let bees sting his penis so it would get bigger. [DListed]

I guess it’s Small Penis Day. Enrique Iglesia says his is tiny, too. Small Penis Power! Small penises have been discriminated against for far too long!!! Small penises unite!!! Rise up and penetrate this social injustice! [Celebslam]

Sharon Stone chugs some wine at Cannes, because she’s all class like that. [CityRag]

Some genius 18-year-old adopted the name Katee Holmes and now plans to lose her virginity on camera. Because, you know, this bitch is totally a virgin. [The Blemish]

Dennis Quaid and his wife are expecting twins. [Glitterati]

John Mayer tries his hand at stand-up. [SOW]

Heidi Klum calls her breasts “Hans” and “Franz.” Seriously. [Cele|bitchy]

Watch Lady Sovereign’s on-stage nervous break-down. [Celebrity Puke]

Yet another Bai Ling nip slip. [The Grumpiest]

Eva Longoria hits up the dance studio. [Drunken Stepfather]

Um, Amy Fisher and Joey Buttafuoco are dating again. And he still hasn’t changed his last name. I don’t understand it, you guys. [Holy Candy]

Angelina Jolie’s taking a year off to focus on family. I’ll believe it when I see it. [Daily Stab]

Keeley Hazell wallpaper downloads. Because some of you will care. [Geno]

Thank you to an EB commenter for pointing me toward Kendra Wilkinson’s incredible fashion line, K Dub. [K-Dub Clothing]

Pics from the Knocked Up premiere party. [LAist]