Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Betting on Heather Mills’ Leg

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I know this is in poor taste, but Heather Mills keeps talking about her leg falling off when she is competing in “Dancing With the Stars” and it keeps making me laugh.

Talking with Extra, Mills said, “It’s very very unlikely my leg’s going to fly off even though it would be quite funny to knock one of the judges out.”

Because of all of this leg talk, www.bodog.com has started to take bets on if the leg will or will not fall off in competition. They made “no” a heavy favorite and the rules stipulate that the leg “must fall off, not be purposely taken off, during a dance routine for all Yes wagers to be graded a win.”

Omg! Can you even imagine if she took her leg off on purpose during a dance? It is going to be interesting to see how long she lasts on the show. I don’t know if she is too popular with Beatles fans but I think she is a great role model for those who are disabled. If she dances well, she will be able to show those out there who are suffering from disabilities like hers that they too can ballroom dance.

I’m glad she’s allowed us to laugh at this, because otherwise, if her leg did fall off and it gave me a chuckle I would feel really bad.

Salma’s Baby Clock Was Ticking

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So this isn’t much of a shocking story, but according to Us Weekly, Salma Hayek pretty much used her uber-rich slightly uggs hubby-to-be for his sperm.

“Salma and Francois haven’t even been dating a year. They were friends for awhile,” says a source. “The truth is that Salma is 40 years old and really wanted a baby. She’s gotten to the point where she really wanted a baby. Francois treats her amazingly and she knew he would be a good father. Most of her friends barely know him! They’re just really happy for her because this is what she’s wanted. She’s spent years with the wrong guys, but she finally found someone that treats her really well.”

He not only treats her well but owns PPR, which makes Gucci and YSL handbags. A baby, rich husband, and free bags. Girl’s gotta be in heaven!

Naomi Watts Back in Love with Love

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Two and half months ago Naomi Watts said:

“I look at those romantic comedies, and I see actors with perfect hair and six-packs, and I feel myself being numbed, and I get angry because I see so much money spent on these things. I don’t mean to sound righteous here,” she continues. “There is need for it, because there are times when I am in a hotel room and need to be numbed.”

“I want a big paycheck, so put me in some dumb romantic comedy any day.”

And now:

Naomi Watts will top line First Look Pictures’ adaptation of Amy Sutherland’s “Kicked, Bitten and Scratched: Life and Lessons at the World’s Premiere School for Exotic Animal Trainers.”

Kristin Hahn and Dana Adam Shapiro will produce the project, developed as a romantic comedy.

Yay! She got her wish! I hope this project is a super duper big paycheck and mind-numbingly dumb on all counts. I hope it is a true affront to humanity so Naomi can rest easy. To recap the issue was not that rom-coms were bad; the issue was that no one had cast her in one yet. You got your wish princess.

This Gal is Not Ugly at All

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We reported back at the end of January that Leo was fair game but I’m sad to report that seems not the be the case. He’s back with the girl who we thought had dumped him.

Jerusalem AP took a quick time-out from being bombed to report:

Leonardo DiCaprio arrived in Israel with supermodel Bar Refaeli this weekend, creating a paparazzi storm… They apparently hoped to slip into the country unnoticed on a night flight from Frankfurt, Germany, on Sunday, but the plane was also carrying a group of Israeli entertainment reporters on their way back from a press junket in Ireland.

Well that’s just bad luck. And it would be hard to hide the fact you were Leo DiCaprio and you happened to be chillin’ with a 21 year-old supermodel. Even with a ballcap on.

Jennifer Hudson Gets Free Burger King FOR LIFE!!!

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I am so jealous. Burger King has just given Oscar winner Jennifer Hudson free Burger King for the rest of her life! I truly believe I could live on BK’s chicken sandwiches alone. I think it has all the food groups, right? And it’s yummy. I need to win an Oscar.

You see, when Jennifer responded to Simon Cowell’s complaints that she didn’t thank American Idol in her Oscar acceptance speech, Hudson responded by saying: “If I’d been any better at my job when I was at Burger King in my middle teens, I wouldn’t be here either, so should I thank them, too?”

Burger King responded with the following statement:

“…In response to Jennifer’s recent comments in which she asked if she should be thanking Burger King, we say thanks, but no thanks are necessary. Burger King Corporation is proud of Jennifer’s success and while we never like to lose employees, in this case, our loss is the entertainment industry’s gain … To further show our support for Jennifer, and make sure she never has to sing for her supper again, Burger King Corporation is giving her a pre-paid BK Crown Card that will be automatically reloaded for life.”

Burger King is only the latest fast food chain to grab free publicity from a celeb’s controversy. In late January, when Kevin Federline took heat from the fast food industry for a Super Bowl commercial, Taco Bell responded by offering K-Fed a one-hour shift, complete with free food for the patrons during that hour.

I Need Cleansing Too

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We don’t delve into politics very often around here and when we do I like to think we delve with an open mind. This is a great story no matter what though:

Mayans to ‘cleanse’ Bush site.

For our foreign readers you should know we’ve got this guy over here named Prez. Bush. He is visiting Guatemala (which means “bad female Guat”) this week and evidently the Mayans aren’t too thrilled. He’s visiting Iximche which of course was the main city of the Kaqchikel Maya people. If you didn’t know that already I can’t help you. C’mon man, read a book. Anyhow:

Mayan priests say they will purify the sacred archaeological site to rid it of any “bad spirits” after Bush is there.

Nice! When our Prez visited Columbia:

About 300 to 350 demonstrators threw rocks and charged a line of about 200 police clad in riot gear. The demonstrators ripped up metal barricades, smashed concrete barriers and used the resulting fragments as projectiles.

Well that’s just innovative. I’m not even mad, I’m impressed.

The protesters smashed the windows of financial institutions as they retreated.

Screw high interest rates! The Prez. Central/South American Tour: It’s Faaaaantastic!

For the Last Time: No One is Taking Britney’s Kids Away from Her Because She Makes out with Chicks

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Or because she flashes her cooter or dresses in skimpy clothes or goes to nightclubs. I’m sorry, America, but that’s just not how it works. The kids are fed, they are warm, they have clothes, they have adult supervision, and no one is beating them up, and I assure you that Los Angeles Children and Family Services are going to deal with all the families who don’t meet one or more of those criteria before they show up to take Britney’s kids away, and that’s gonna take them at least the next year or twenty.

I guess there are new nudy pics of Britney from that night she was traipsing around some NYC nightclub, bonding with the go-go dancers. Everyone’s bidding on them right now (bidding’s at around $150K). But there’s also a tape, caught by security cameras, of Brit-Brit and some of those dancers engaging in a little more hard-core partying (it’s not clear from the article whether we’re talking drugs or sex or both). “If that thing goes on the Internet, there’s going to be big trouble. It might be what they need to take [Spears'] kids away from her,” says a source. Ugh. Once again: might Kevin win at least partial custody of the kids in a custody battle because he’s their father and he can take care of them? Yeah, maybe. But no one is going to come a-knockin’ on Britney’s door like, “Hey, remember how you ate out that go-go dancer in New York a few months back? It’s on tape. Yeah, we can’t have you doing that and raising kids at the same time. Mm-kay?” Not gonna happen, people.