Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Late-Night Links

BREAKING! BRITNEY SPEARS RUSHED TO THE … dentist? [Perez]

Prince Harry reminds us once again that he’s not going to be King of England. [Ninja Dude]

Naomi Campbell leaves the Department of Sanitation in a couture evening gown. Now that is how a supermodel cleans a toilet. [Gone Hollywood]

Is Kate Moss banging David Beckham? Nah, probably not, but that Pete Doherty fellow sure is a heroin addict. [Agent Bedhead]

Wait, remind me again why anyone would cast Winona Ryder in anything these days? Oh, right. [The Blemish]

The funny old man from David Letterman died (no, not David Letterman). [Tabloid Whore]

Piper Perabo!!! You’re alive!!! Hey, remember that one movie you did? Yeah, me neither. [TBYLTH]

Paris Hilton takes a cab, probably because she was too drunk to remember where she put her car keys. [IBBB]

Grease- Who Did America Want?

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I will admit, with a bit of reluctance, that I watched the entire season of “Grease- You’re The One That I Want.” I have to say, that as someone who is involved in the world of musical theatre, this show is totally contrived.

These people aren’t the best of Broadway…but singing and dancing makes good TV and the Broadway production of Grease has already grossed 3 million in early ticket sales. Even if this wasn’t a winner in the ratings the producers of the show will be making a lot of money.

The Finale is a bit overly dramatic but the dream of being a Broadway Star is a lofty goal. For those who have been following the show we are down to Max, Laura, Ashley and Austin.

After a whole lot of filler we learn that our new Danny and Sandy are:
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And our non-winners:
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If you are a big “Grease” fan the show will open this summer on Broadway!

Miss USA 2007

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This year, like always, we had some beautiful girls but only one could take home the title of Top Model…I mean Miss USA. Since Donald Trump has taken over the pageant it has been sex and scandal! Tara Connor’s recovery from drug and alcohol abuse is huge part of the show tonight. Going to rehab I guess is part of the new American Dream.

I am a bit upset because Tara got these awful bangs and seems a bit boring. Maybe all of her charisma came from the coke? I was a big Tara Connor fan because I’m a huge pageant freak.

I love the fact that this year there is an awesome smattering of Dlist hosts, which includes Vanessa Manillo, Kimora Lee Simmons, Jonathan Antin (“Blow Out”), and Jerry Springer. The bathing suit competition is full of girls with shockingly amazing bodies. I am starting to understand why this competition is way more popular than Miss America. The evening gowns are the usual tacky pageant fare with lots of sparkles. Really the best part of the evening gown competition is when Rhode Island almost fell down the stairs. That would have been awesome.
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We Are Crazy About Knut

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The cute three-month-old polar bear Knut has become a star in his native Germany. Some crazy animal rights people want to have Knut killed after his mother abandoned him but the Berlin Zoo will keep him in captivity. They believe he will grow big and strong and will be well taken care of at the Zoo. Polar bears are generally loners so his human bonding won’t be detrimental to his well-being.

Today was Knut’s hotly-anticipated debut to the world. They are making stuffed Knut polar bears outside of his enclosure and over 200 journalists showed up to take his picture. I can’t get over how cute this little bear is. If you are having a bad day take a gander at these adorable photos.
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What a cute Knut!

Everyone is Honoring Tom Cruise

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The happy (and maybe preggers??) Ashton-Demi couple made an appearance at Mentor LA’s Promise gala honoring Tom Cruise. I think Demi Moore looks absolutely stunning for a woman her age, but if you look closely at her legs in the hi-def versions of these pics, she definitely is getting old-lady knees. That makes me happy because it means I still have something on Demi Moore, and it also makes me sad because it is proof that, no matter how much time, money and effort you put into it, you can’t totally pass for 20′s when you’re in your 40′s. Heh. Well, I still have fifteen years or so for plastic surgery to improve. It is nice that Mentor LA is “a nonprofit organization dedicated to revitalizing the schools and neighborhoods of some of the most disenfranchised communities in Los Angeles,” but maybe we need to be investing our time and energy in things that will allow me to have hot kneecaps when I’m 40.

Also, just to be a bitch, it’s nice that these people can piggyback off Tom Cruise’s fame in order to try to do something good for the world, but I can’t really figure out just what Tom did for these people. Their website briefly calls him their “supporter,” and talks a little about how much his movies make, but I get the sense this is more like “We want to thank Tom Cruise for lending us his name and face so that everyone will write about our event,” than “We want to thank Tom Cruise for his generous donations and his vocal support for the fact that real problems require real solutions, not horror stories about aliens and a backlash against the science of psychiatry.” But whatevs. Among the gala’s chairs were Ron Meyer (that’s the daddy of Spiderman’s baby mama, Jennifer Meyer), Terry Semel (the Yahoo guy and dad of Courtenay Semel, Paris Hilton wannabe and world-class but-her-face), and Paula Wagner, Cruise’s producing partner.

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Have We Solved the Mystery of Anna Nicole’s Death?

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Who needs a medical examiner when you have Star magazine? While the Broward County coroner is scheduled to make an announcement with the cause of Anna Nicole’s death on Monday morning, Star and National Enquirer (in a “joint newsgathering operation,” because they’re both owned by AMI and Star couldn’t find a celeb scoop with two hands and flashlight) are claiming to have already solved the mystery: Anna died of an overdose of chloral hydrate, a sleeping medication, which she was probably taking in very high doses because she was suffering from a blood infection, which would have eventually killed her not long after the sleeping pills did.

That good enough for ya? Honestly, that’s pretty damn good. So we’ll back up a little and give you some choice quotes from Star’s article.

[J]ust before she left the Bahamas for Florida on February 5 … Anna Nicole received an injection in her left buttock. Tests did not reveal what that substance was. “As she boarded the plane for Miami, Anna Nicole developed a painful abscess at the site of the injection,” said a source with knowledge of the case. “The needle wasn’t sterile. The pain kept getting worse as the abscess got larger and larger very quickly.”

Anna Nicole, unaware that her blood was being poisoned by infection, had also developed a second infection from a virulent form of norovirus, which causes intestinal problems.

Anna Nicole — and her entourage — made a fatal mistake. She refused to go to a hospital, a decision that would have saved her life. Instead, Anna’s people gave her an ice bath to control the fever, administered the antibiotic ciprofloxacin by mouth and gave her an over-the-counter flu medicine. As the needle-caused infection took over her body, she began vomiting, had severe diarrhea and could not urinate.

Anna just wanted some respite from the pain, so she took way too much chloral hydrate (this is the same stuff you see in suspense movies when the bad guy puts a cloth over the victim’s mouth and they pass out — that’s how intense this stuff is). She fell asleep, and never woke up.

Is it true? I’m going with yes. First off, it’s a fairly complex story to have been invented. I mean, a septic abscess? You can’t make that up. You just wouldn’t. There’s nothing glamorous about it. It’s a fantastically plebian way to die. Perhaps most importantly, AMI is so confident they’re right that they pinned both Star and National Enquirer‘s name on it. When these mags are not sure, they hedge their bets and have their titles run different stories. So my guess is we’ll hear a very similar story from the mouth of the Broward County coroner on Monday morning, but only time will tell.

Dancing With The Stars

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So I understand that this show premiered Monday but I am a little slow on the uptake this week with my reality TV…thank my lucky stars for TiVo…sweet TiVo.

“Dancing with the Stars” is back for its 4th Season! Dancers won’t be leaving us until next week so really this first week we are just getting to know how bad these d-listers really are at the Cha Cha. We get to meet the professional dancers first and they are hot as always…lots of babes and Russian hotties. The production number with the real dancers is always my favorite part of the show because they are always so good.

Ian Ziering/Cheryl Burke Ian is lucky to have Cheryl as his partner as she is a two-time champion of DWTS. She is a sick dancer and really does make her partners look good. Ian is really hot. I am a huge 90210 fan and it is awesome to see that is has aged quite well. He and Cheryl make a great couple and he is pretty good with his energy and footwork. The judges want a big more sex from Ian but are pretty impressed.
Score: 21
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