Today's Evil Beet Gossip

He’s Alive!!!

George Clooney and Injured Sarah Larson on Crutches attend Michael Clayton Premiere in NYC

George Clooney and his gimpy girlfriend, Sarah Larson, seem to have survived last week’s motorcycle accident. The injured couple showed up at the premiere of Michael Clayton in NYC on Monday night.

“I’m a little dinged up – lots of Neosporin,” he told reporters at the event. “I’m definitely not jogging or doing jumping jacks.”

He also mentioned that the incident may not have gone over so well with the producers of Burn After Reading, the film he’s shooting in New York.

“I’m not supposed to be on a motorcycle,” he said. “I think I am in trouble now.”

My Job Will Never Get Boring

Chloe Moretz on the Red Carpet at Dirty Sexy Money Premiere

Chloe Moretz Poses at the Red Carpet Premiere of Dirty Sexy Money in Los Angeles

10-year-old Chloe Moretz works the red carpet at the Dirty Sexy Money premiere in LA.

So what if Lindsay Lohan’s getting sober?

So what if Paris Hilton’s behaving herself?

So what if Britney Spears is going to die soon?

They are all replaceable.

Welcome, darling Chloe. Have a beer.

Things You Guys Should Know

1) We are still having intermittent server issues due to increasing traffic levels. I love you guys for this. Unfortunately, it means we’re still having a lot of down time. I PROMISE you guys I am on top of this — I have not abandoned you (but thank you for the concerned emails) — and we’re getting it resolved as fast as the little server mice can run.

2) I’m now writing for, so go over there and check out my recap of Tim Gunn’s Guide to Style.

3) Mediabistro ran an interview with me today, so I guess it’s time to play Meet Your Editor.


Check Out the Curves on Nicole!

Nicole Richie Baby Bump Photos in Bikini on Hawaii Beach

Miss Richie hit the Hawaii beaches to celebrate her 26th birthday. Fiance Joel Madden was there, too. She’s actually looking quite good these days, and I’m impressed with her for spending her birthday on the beach in Hawaii instead of in LA — even though she probably did invite the paparazzi along.

Nicole Richie Pregnancy Bump Photos in Bikini on Hawaii Beach Nicole Richie Baby Bump Photos in Bikini on Hawaii Beach

Lindsay Lohan: Still in Rehab

Lindsay Lohan Smoking Outside Cirque Lodge Rehab in Utah

I love it when we get new shots of Lindsay at the Cirque Lodge (where Richie Sambora joined her this weekend) because I’m just so happy that she’s still at the Cirque Lodge. Maybe — just maybe — this girl is actually going to get her shit together for real.

And I’m in no rush to have her back out partying anymore. Between OJ and Britney, I’m plenty busy. And by the time Britney actually manages to take her mental health seriously and check into rehab for real, I’m confident Hayden Panettiere will be drunk and half-naked all around L.A. Ah, the circle of life.

Britney’s Bodyguard: Britney is a REALLY BAD MOM

Alli Sims, Britney Spears and Bodyguard Tony Barretto, Picture, Photo

Ugh, I can’t even deal with all of this (so I don’t know how the hell Britney’s coping), but Britney’s former bodyguard, Tony Barretto, spoke to News of the World about her frightening, drug-addicted behavior. This is after he agreed to testify against Britney in the recent custody hearing. I really don’t understand the legality of this — didn’t Britney make him sign an NDA? I understand that may not prevent him from speaking in court, but shouldn’t it prevent him from speaking to the media? How the hell did she let this happen?

“With her drug and booze issues, her home is no place for children to be raised,” he is quoted as saying. “I am a dad and what I saw shocked me so much that it has forced me to take this measure.”

He talks about Britney partying with Howie Day in a rehab just days after she was released from rehab (Day checked back into rehab soon after) and overdosing on cocaine and crystal meth. “We were panicking,” he says. “We thought she was going to die.”

He talks about how Britney keeps the kids up late so that they’ll sleep through the morning and not wake her up. “She speaks to them in weird, creepy, baby voices, in made-up languages, which they just don’t get. All it does is unsettle, upset and scare them. Often she would scream and cry uncontrollably. Imagine what that is like for young children.”

There’s a lot more there if you wanna read the article yourself.

I always think it’s a riot when News of the World — a British publication — “quotes” American sources.

Here’s what Tony Barretto was “quoted” as saying about Brit’s relationship with K-Fed:

“They would just have massive rows on the phone all the time. She would scream at him, and it would deeply distress her. I saw her throw her mobile out of her car during one of their shouting matches. I never saw mum and dad together with their kids.”

You can hear a video of Barretto talking on their website, and this guy is obviously 100% American. Americans don’t say “row.” They say “fight.” They don’t say “mobile,” they say “cell.” And they don’t say “mum,” they say “mom.” So take this article — and its supposed quotes — with a healthy serving of salt, kids.

Happy Couple?

Djimon Hounsou and Kimora Lee Simmons Leaving Koi, Picture, Photo

Kimora Lee Simmons and boyfriend Djimon Hounsou hurried past the photogs this weekend after leaving Koi.

Kimora recently divorced Russell Simmons, who she’d been dating since she was a teenager.

I don’t know much about this woman, but every time I see her in an interview I’m like “Oh my God that woman is such a pain in the ass.” Maybe Djimon’s just bad-ass enough that she’s nice to him. Anyway, he’s a total hottie, which is the main reason I’m running this pic.

Photo credit: Buzz Foto