It’s a slow news day, so we’re gonna talk about breasts around here for a little while, and I just ran across these pics of Brittny Gastineau from last night.
They’ve been that size for awhile — I was just looking through old photos from Gastineau Girls and they’re about that large, but I can’t decide if they’re real or if she had a boob job. What do you guys think?
Singer/songwriter/trainwreck Amy Winehouse isn’t going to rehab anytime soon — The Sun got ahold of her rider for her recent Glastonbury show, and it’s all liquor all the time. According to the British paper, Winehouse’s wish list includes the following:
2 bottles of red wine
1 large bottle of vodka
1 bottle of champagne
1 bottle of brandy
1 case of lager
40 Marlboro Lights
3 “good quality” HOT pizzas
Winehouse also requested “two competent, sober local crew,” and noted that if the pizzas are not hot, “the band will refuse them.”
Apparently there was a shortage of condoms in Hollywood last October. It turns out Julia Roberts wasn’t the only one to pop out a kiddo recently. Tiger Woods and his wife, hottie Elin Nordegren, welcomed a daughter, Sam Alexis, on Monday. Keri Russell, who I guess did a show called Felicity but who will always be, to me, a member of the MMC, gave birth to her first baby with husband Shane Deary, a son named River Russell. Not to be left out, King of Queens star Kevin James welcomed his second daughter, Shea Joelle, with his wife on June 14. Congratulations to all!
For the first time in recent memory, Nicole Richie really, really doesn’t want to be more like Paris Hilton. The tiny starlet announced today through her lawyer that she will fight her most recent DUI charge, and a court date has been set for July 11. Richie was formally charged with a DUI in February, after driving the wrong way on an L.A. freeway last December as she was leaving boyfriend Joel Madden’s house at 4 in the morning.
Nicole has a previous DUI, so if she’s convicted, she faces a minimum of five days in prison, and a maximum of one year. All this happens to coincide with Internet rumors that Nicole’s preggers — with photographs of Richie’s supposed “baby bump” circulating. At first my reaction was, like, you say “baby bump,” I say “distended belly.” But these rumors have persisted for several weeks now, and the photos are becoming more convincing — I wonder if Nicole’s hoping a pregnancy will keep her out of jail.
Here is an excerpt from the manuscript of OJ Simpson’s failed book “If I Did It.” Now this sounds to me like him actually confessing to killing Nicole Brown and Ron Goldman.
I know double jeopardy and all…but can’t OJ get in trouble for confessing? It makes me so sick he didn’t get locked up forever for this.
Then something went horribly wrong, and I know what happened, but I can’t tell you exactly how. I was still standing in Nicole’s courtyard, of course, but for a few moments I couldn’t remember how I’d gotten there, when I’d arrived, or even why I was there. Then it came back to me, very slowly: The recital-with little Sydney up on stage, dancing her little heart out; me, chipping balls into my neighbor’s yard; Paula, angry, not answering her phone; Charlie, stopping by the house to tell me some more ugly shit about Nicole’s behavior. Then what? The short, quick drive from Rockingham to the Bundy condo. And now? Now I was standing in Nicole’s courtyard, in the dark, listening to the loud, rhythmic, accelerated beating of my own heart. I put my left hand to my heart and my shirt felt strangely wet. I looked down at myself. For several moments, I couldn’t get my mind around what I was seeing. The whole front of me was covered in blood, but it didn’t compute. Is this really blood? I wondered. And whose blood is it? Is it mine? Am I hurt?
LOCK OJ UP! I bet his kids are really happy that this got leaked to the internet. Way to be a responsible parent OJ.
The Vatican has come up with the “Drivers 10 Commandments.” Got road rage? The Catholic church wants to help you through it. I have to say that after visiting the Beet in California I would need these to deal with SoCal highway traffic. Thankfully I live in New York so I just yell at people on the subway. But here are the commandments if you need a little bit more Jesus in your daily commute.
1. You shall not kill.
2. The road shall be for you a means of communion between people and not of mortal harm.
3. Courtesy, uprightness and prudence will help you deal with unforeseen events.
4. Be charitable and help your neighbor in need, especially victims of accidents.
5. Cars shall not be for you an expression of power and domination, and an occasion of sin.
6. Charitably convince the young and not so young not to drive when they are not in a fitting condition to do so.
7. Support the families of accident victims.
8. Bring guilty motorists and their victims together, at the appropriate time, so that they can undergo the liberating experience of forgiveness.
9. On the road, protect the more vulnerable party.
10. Feel responsible toward others.
I bet the Pope also wouldn’t be down with teenagers losing their virginity in motor vehicles…but “don’t do it in the back of your dad’s Taurus” just doesn’t sound elegant does it?
How cute are Katie Holmes and Suri? I have to say that the alien baby is really growing up to be a beautiful girl. They are a cute pair with Katie and her new mommy haircut.
Sources keep saying that Katie is knocked up with another alien spawn. I hope, for her sake, that she isn’t so she can get out of the grip of creepy Cruise soon.
For more pictures of this adorable pair click [here]