Today's Evil Beet Gossip

I Was Going to Get Sober, But Then I Got High

Lindsay Lohan at Winston’s 5/21/07

Part II in today’s series. Lindsay Lohan shows up at Winston’s last night looking — well — not sober. Click the thumbnail for a close-up of her face. This girl is twenty years old. She looks like she just walked off the set of some sort of Lifetime Movie of the Week, in which she stars as a 35-year-old housewife whose husband kicks her ass regularly. Which is, you know, exactly the parts she’ll be getting in a couple years if her box office record keeps up like this.

Lindsay Lohan’s Face Looks Like Shit

Photo credit: Buzz Foto

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Joe Francis Didn’t Sexually Assault That Girl, Either

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Joey Boy pleaded not guilty to yet another charge stemming from his sexual misadventures, this time involving a teenager in L.A. who claims Francis repeatedly fondled her, even after she repeatedly asked him to stop. He’ll be in court June 26 for a pre-trial hearing in the matter. He faces a maximum of six months in jail if convicted.

Francis’s lawyer made the following statement:

The allegations made by the alleged victim claiming she was “touched” are ridiculous. There is absolutely no merit to these charges. Mr. Francis is a successful man in a high profile position, and unfortunately, that makes him a target of people who hope to benefit in some way from attacking him. Mr. Francis isn’t going to sit by and put up with these types of baseless attacks. He will vigorously defend himself and take whatever action necessary to clear his name. We believe that the Court or the City Attorney’s office will ultimately be convinced to dismiss this matter.

Francis is currently being held in Oklahoma, and will soon be moved to Nevada to face federal tax evasion charges. He just wrapped up a stint in a Florida prison after pleading guilty to contempt of court, where he managed to rack up even more charges for himself by trying to bribe a guard for bottled water and smuggling prescription drugs into his cell.

And, it wouldn’t be a Joe Francis article if I didn’t take a moment to remind you all of the L.A. Times piece in August of last year in which the reported accuses Francis of raping a young girl. I’m just saying.

Okay, I Think I’m Ready to Talk About Paula Abdul and This Chihuahua

Paula Abdul Could Have Stepped Over the Chihuahua, Just Like This

It’s not that I’ve been ignoring this story, per se, it’s just that, like, what do you really say? She broke her nose when she tripped over her chihuahua.

This is not the sort of thing one does sober.

I mean, far be it from me to point fingers or accuse someone of being an addict. All I’m saying is this: sober people do not trip over chihuahuas.

I have three cats in my apartment. It’s a small apartment. It’s a one-bedroom. There are three cats. They are all approximately chihuahua-sized. I have had three cats for two years now. I have never — never – tripped over any one of them, let alone broken my nose in the process. I’m just saying.

Sober people don’t trip over chihuahuas.

And that’s all I have to say about that.

Fox News brings us this interview with Paula after the fact, wherein she looks pretty damn wasted and generally displeased to be forced to recount her chihuahua-tripping incident. TMZ has video (here) of Paula on the way to the interview, crying her eyes out. I’m sure this has not been a fun process for her.

Paula will appear on the American Idol finale tonight — in fact, they probably start taping in LA here in just a few hours — and I look forward to watching her defend this look to Simon.

Is Rachel McAdams Lying About Her Age?

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From Radar:

Rachel McAdams is too young to lie about her age—or is she?
The star of Wedding Crashers and The Notebook claims she was born in October 1978, making her 28. But imdb.com puts her birthday in 1976—and those who’ve looked into the matter believe the earlier date may be accurate.

In a November 2005 profile, Details listed McAdams’s age as 29, prompting her then-publicist, Ame Van Iden, to complain vigorously. (McAdams later fired Van Iden, reportedly because the flack booked her to appear nude on Vanity Fair’s cover without her consent.) A Details source says the magazine agreed to run a correction only after Van Iden assured them that IMDb had been notified of its error.

As of yesterday, however, the site was still listing her as 30. When Elle wrote McAdams up for its April cover, it got around the problem by saying, “IMDb states [she] is 30, but [she] is really, truly, ask her mother, 28.”

What’s the truth? “Her birthday is inaccurately reported,” says her rep. “She is 28 years old.” But a source involved with one of her recent films says it’s “no secret among the producers” that she shaves a couple years off her age in interviews—only to add them back on when she’s up for a part that calls for a more “mature” actress.

Wikipedia, for the record, lists her age as 28, but notes that “her exact year of birth is unknown. Some websites list it as 1976 and some websites list it as 1978. This means that she could be between the ages of 28 and 30.”

OMG. How is this such a problem? Someone went to kindergarten with her. Time to come out of the woodwork, people.

Eh, really, though, whether she’s 28 or 30, at least we can all agree that she’s old.

Shit

ORAL sex increases your risk of getting throat cancer, experts warned last night.

They said that it can pass on the human papilloma virus, which also triggers cervical cancer in women. And they claim oral sex is an even BIGGER cause of throat cancer — which kills 1,700 people a year — than smoking or drinking.

A study found men and women who had oral sex with more than six people in their lifetimes were 8.6 times more likely to develop the disease.

But smokers were only three times more likely to get it and drinkers were just two-and-a-half times more at risk.

The researchers compared 100 men and women with throat cancer to 200 healthy people, taking into account their sex lives.

They found that having oral sex does not always mean you get the HPV virus. But those who do catch it are 32 times more likely to develop throat cancer, which also affects the tonsils and the back of the tongue.

Surprisingly, people who already have HPV do not boost their risk of throat cancer if they also smoke or drink.

Until now, experts thought cigarettes and booze were the biggest causes.

[source via A Socialite's Life]