Because, you know, when it was just one sex tape and one DUI, it was kind of funny to leave these two alone with small children and farm animals. But now we’re dealing with multiple recorded hours of drug use, racist rants, probable herpes infections, pregnancies out of wedlock, three DUIs and two jail sentences, and all of a sudden no one really wants their kids on TV quite that badly anymore.
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Did Jessica Alba dump her boyfriend because he wouldn’t marry her? [Derek Hail]
Jamie Pressley goes for “Pirate slut chic” on her birthday. [Drunken Stepfather]
Check out Lindsay Lohan’s Jill Stuart ads. [POTP]
Heidi Klum sluts it up for Arena magazine. [Fatback & Collards]
Faith Hill doesn’t want anyone else grabbing her husband’s balls. [Jordan]
So I’m flipping through a bunch of photos from the Stardust premiere in LA, and I can’t help but notice that Miss Claire Danes has a distinctly man-like quality in all of them. Is this just me? Has she always kind of had a mannish facial structure? Or has all that homewrecking just given her an extra dose of testosterone recently? What do you guys think?
Remember the good old days, when the worst thing we had to say about Britney Spears was that she married Kevin Federline? Back when we thought he was the problem? Oh, how very wrong we were!
Another disastrous chapter in Britney’s life (and, by extension, all of ours) has come to a close, as her divorce from Kevin was finalized today.
It looks like Kevin’s getting $15K/month in child support as well as $20K/month in spousal support, but the spousal support will come to an end in November. The custody arrangement is currently a 50/50 split, but neither party is happy with that arrangement. Kevin, who’s not even on speaking terms with Britney right now, wants full custody, and word on the street is that he plans to go back to court as early as this week to fight for it. Last I heard, Britney’s mother and father are backing up Kevin’s fight for full custody, because they recognize what a train wreck their daughter’s become. Hey, at least they’re not enabling Britney’s insanity, a la Dina Lohan.
From the big house to the big screen, Paris Hilton’s lined up yet another movie role.
Hilton will star in 2008′s Repo! The Genetic Musical, which appears to a be a futuristic, sci-fi musical centering around the demise of the human race. Paris calls it a “unique project,” and she’s right; it’s unique in that they hired her. “I’ve been rehearsing every dayâ€”seven hours a day,” said Hilton. “We’re just in the studio. We’re doing dance and singing. We go shoot next month in Toronto.” Paris mentioned she was looking forward to the Toronto shoot, because “I hear Greece is just beautiful in the fall.”
The film’s director, the same guy behind the Saw franchise, backs up his decision to cast the heiress, stating, “I have auditioned at least 30 actresses for this roleâ€”Paris came in and owned it. She is this role.”
Paris isn’t limiting her in-studio activities to the film world. She’s also been working with Scott Storch — who worked with her on her debut album — to create a sophomore release, and has been spotted around LA recording studios. I hope this album focuses on rapping about doing hard time, because that’s about the only way I’ll find it interesting. The novelty’s gone, Paris. It was funny the first time. Now it’s just unnecessary.
From Page Six:
WHICH actress’ weight gain is being blamed on her scoundrel ex-boyfriend who knocked her up? She only started shedding some of the weight when he forced her to terminate her pregnancy.