Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Okay, So What Were These Medical Reasons?

If you’re awake, you probably already know that Paris Hilton was released from jail early this morning due to “medical reasons.” (You can read the press release from the LA Sheriff’s Dept here.)

Lars speculates that the “medical reasons” are because she wasn’t eating, which sounds like as good a guess as any.

However, publicist Jonathan Jaxson claims to have the real story straight from the Hilton family:

Paris was apparently suffering from severe panic attacks and depression, where she even became suicidal. Towards the end of her stay, Paris began, what others call, a nervous breakdown. Her psychiatrist was so concerned for her well being they did everything possible to get her to a place in which was comfortable for her and her health.

This isn’t exactly consistent with TMZ’s story that Paris was beginning to adjust to jail life, but it’s possible her improved attitude was due to her knowledge that she’d be getting out soon.

Regardless, none of these seem like acceptable reasons for her to be let out of jail. Poor baby, she doesn’t like it there. She’s not eating and she’s crying a whole lot. We need to let her out.

Nobody likes jail. That’s why it’s a punishment.

Sigh.

Paris Out Of Jail

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TMZ is reporting this morning that Paris has been freed after only three days in the clink.

TMZ.com quoted what it called “unimpeachable sources” saying Hilton left the Century Regional Detention Facility in Lynwood, California, early Thursday.

If these sources indeed can’t be peached then I’d say our long national nightmare is over.

**Update**

Paris Hilton has been fitted for ankle bracelet and put under house arrest, after authorities determined to release Hilton from prison due to medical reasons, this according to Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Dept. spokesperson Steve Whitmore.

Medical reasons!! So, she’ll be delivered back to the mansion where her servants can work her back into health. I bet this is due to her not eating. Now I totally know why the caged bird sings…

On the Lot Perhaps Moving Off

Despite enviably having the American Idol finale lead-in for its premiere, Fox’s On the Lot is averaging a mere 3.1 million viewers in its ever-changing time slot. I know my buddy MK over at popbytes likes the show, but I just couldn’t get into it. They keep switching up hosts (Is it Chelsea Handler? Is it Adrianna Costa? Any chance of Rosie O’Donnell next week?) and judges (I was initially promised a weekly Brett Ratner!) and formats (Weren’t they making a film in teams at one point?). There’s such a lack of consistency on the show that I honestly couldn’t even figure out whose picture I was supposed to use at the top of this post. Do not confuse the bloggers, Fox. We’re not big on solving puzzles — that’s why we have commenters.

And, frankly, there’s a very good reason why there’s not a large market for short films. Audiences don’t want to tune in to watch them for an hour. I’m not sure how that little tidbit didn’t arise in initial testing for the show. Anyway, if you are, against all odds, finding yourself a fan of the show, don’t get too attached. I doubt it’ll even make it to the end of the season, and none of these kids will get a job at DreamWorks, which is probably just the way Steven Spielberg wants it, anyway.

Thanks to Defamer for the heads-up.

Kate Bosworth: Still Eating!

Kate Bosworth at Whitney Museum picture

Yay! It appears Miss Kate Bosworth is continuing to eat like a normal human being, and she looks fantastic! It’s great to keep seeing pictures of her looking healthy and happy.

Kate showed up at the Whitney Museum‘s Art Party on Wednesday night, along with many other celebs. Sarah Michelle Gellar and hottie hubby Freddy Prinze Jr were there, along with Rosario Dawson, ousted Top Chef host Katie Lee Joel, who may or may not be leaving her grandpa husband Billy, Ivanka Trump, and the always fabulous Holly Dunlap, the designer behind the celeb-favorite Hollywould brand (I imagine her outfit is from her latest collection).

Kate Bosworth Whitney Museum Photo Ivanka Trump Whitney Museum Party Picture Rosario Dawson Whitney Museum Party Picture Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddy Prinze Jr Whitney Museum Party Pic Katie Lee Joel Picture Whitney Museum Holly Dunlap Hollywould Whitney Museum Party Pics Holly Dunlap Hollywould Whitney Museum Party Photo

Guess Who Winner!

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I waited a while for this…partially because of the random responses. Seriously. Doris Roberts and Ray Romano???

The winner of our guessing game.

Which married actress in a hit prime-time show has been propositioning her boyish co-star? She recently texted him while he was on vacation in Mexico, saying: “We have chemistry – I really think we could make it work.”

Is our reader lolly. your punch and pie is in the mail.

# lolly Says:
June 6th, 2007 at 1:33 pm e

i’m gonna guess jenna fischer from the office and bj novack!

I will be on top of this little item and hopefully figure out really who it is. My vote was always Jenna and either BJ or hottie John Krasinski.

Links Links Links

Lindsay Lohan’s mom lied about being a Rockette. For shame! [Cele|bitchy]

Cameron Diaz’s new boyfriend, magician Criss Angel, drops 40 feet in a closed box for a stunt in NYC. And just in case that didn’t make a loud enough thud, he proceeds to drops Cameron’s name, too. [Yeeeah!]

Meanwhile, the ever-groundbreaking Justin Timberlake signs a YouTube star to his new record label, because this Internet thing seems like it’s really going to take off. [IBBB]

Meanwhile still, Maggie Gyllenhaal’s bringing breast-feeding back. [The Blemish]

Sobriety hasn’t done much for Courtney Love’s tone-deafness, but it’s still kinda cool to watch her perform her new single, Pacific Coast Highway. [popbytes]

Kate Bosworth is totally making out with Liv Tyler. I know you don’t remember who Liv Tyler is — don’t worry, no one does — but the pics should jog your memory. [SOW]

This fabulous post is called “The Evolution of Joan Rivers’ Face,” which is kind of a misnomer, because it hasn’t changed a bit since 1970. [Celebrity Smack]

Christina Aguilera celebrates the 30th birthday of her total hottie husband. [Derek Hail]

Glamour named Victoria Beckham “Woman of the Year,” for reasons I cannot even being to imagine. Fortunately, she came to the awards ceremony dressed to prove without a doubt that she has a vagina. [Celeb Warship]

300 Premieres in Tokyo

Gerard Butler 300 Tokyo Premiere

Once your film has conquered North America in all its arguably homoerotic glory, what’s next? Where can you bring this film where the violent nature, the man-love, and the fact that it was released in the U.S. a full three months ago will all be deeply appreciated?

Tokyo, baby.

Gerard Butler and his penis were on-hand at the Meiji Shrine to premiere the film in Japan. Enjoy.

Gerard Butler 300 Tokyo Premiere Picture Gerard Butler 300 Tokyo Premiere Photo Gerard Butler 300 Japan Premiere Picture