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38Joe Francis Is Going to Be in Jail FOREEEEEEEEEVER!!!

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Oh, happy day!

Girls Gone Wild founder/rapist Joe Francis has lost his bid to be released from a Nevada jail without fear of being extradited to Florida.

Joe’s in jail in Nevada for tax evasion. He’s wanted in Florida on charges related to filming underage girls on spring break, naked.

On Wednesday, U.S. District Judge Brian Sandoval denied arguments by Francis’ lawyers that would have freed Francis, but kept Florida prosecutors from jailing him.

Oh, Joe. Every day you’re in jail is a happy day for me.

March 6, 2008 at 12:30 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Joe Francis

4Michelle Williams “Didn’t Know Where to Go” After Heath Break-Up

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In an interview with Elle magazine just days before her former fiance’s death, Michelle Williams spoke about how she struggled through her break-up with Heath Ledger.

“I didn’t know where to go,” she said. “I couldn’t imagine any place in the world that was gonna feel good to me.”

She continues:

“I’m always aware of the whole. I have that feeling inside, like when something really tickles or delights me—it’s not singular. I recognize all the awful things in the world, and in spite of them, I can still laugh. For so long, I felt like a walking open wound everywhere I went. There’s this Joan Didion quote about being afflicted from an early age with a presentiment of loss. Did I come into the world like that? Or was I kind of gifted that?”

Aw, Michelle.

March 6, 2008 at 12:20 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Michelle Williams

54Cynthia Nixon Still In Love with World’s Ugliest Woman

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If Aishwarya Rai is the World’s Most Beautiful Woman, I’d like to put Christine Marinoni in the running for the World’s Ugliest.

She’s also Cynthia Nixon’s girlfriend.

And Cynthia isn’t, like, the most beautiful person on the planet, but she’s a cutie, and every time I see a pic of her with this chick I cringe a little bit. But, whatever, she’s happy. Says Cynthia to OK! magazine: “I’m in a fantastic relationship. We shop and cook and raise children…We both pitch in … I’m in love with her because she’s her. If she were a man, would I be in love with her? I don’t know.”

I’d make some joke about how she looks like a man, anyway, but that’s not true: she looks like an awkward 14-year-old boy.

The couple lives in Brooklyn, where they’re raising Cynthia’s two kids, Samantha, 11, and Charles, 6.

March 6, 2008 at 12:09 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Cynthia Nixon

15Jenna Jameson Might Survive

Jenna Jameson at Premiere of Never Back Down, Pictures, Photos

Jenna showed up with Tito to the premiere of Never Back Down, and I’m not going to go so far as to say she looks healthy, but she certainly looks healthier. She looks like she’s gained a few pounds. Not, like, in a she’s-getting-fat-way, just in she’s-15-pounds-away-from-being-able-to-menstruate-again sort of way. She looks okay here. I want you to be okay, Jenna. I don’t know exactly what you’ve been going through this past year, but from the looks of some of your pictures, it’s been rough. So hopefully this set of pictures is a sign that things are looking up for ya, girl.

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March 6, 2008 at 1:50 am by Evil Beet

26Caption This

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Katie Price — aka Jordan — launches her new lingerie collection in Britain.

March 6, 2008 at 1:36 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Katie Price

17Jamie-Lynn Spears is Pregnant and Acting

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The 16-year-old celeb sib will appear on the pilot of Miss Guided, a new series for ABC. The series stars Judy Greer — you know, that blonde chick with the skinny nose who always plays the principal character’s best friend? — as “a formerly awkward high school student who returns to her alma mater all grown up — and as a guidance counselor.” Ashton Kutcher is the executive producer on the series, and he’ll apparently also appear in the pilot.

The episode was taped in October. JLS announced she was pregnant in late December. Was she already preggers when the episode taped? It’s anyone’s guess.

March 6, 2008 at 1:33 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Jamie-Lynn Spears