Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Paris is PISSED

Check out this video footage of Paris Hilton demanding her sex video be removed from the shelves of an LA adult store.

Honestly, Paris, aren’t you like 5 years too late to start complaining about this shit?

They Did It!

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Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes finally managed to take a full-body shot where she doesn’t tower over him. She’s wearing flats and you’d better believe his shoes have lifts in them.

Jenna Elfman’s husband, Bodhi, wasn’t so lucky.

Is this a Scientology thing? Are they supposed to marry women who make them look short?

Sasha Cohen, Because It’s Cool That She Can Do That Thing with Her Leg

Sasha Cohen Skates at The Rink at Rockefeller Center, November 2, Pictures, Photos

The Olympic medalist showed her stuff off at The Rink at Rockefeller Center on Friday.

I just think she’s so adorable. And I wish I could do that with my leg. I bet I’d get asked out more often. I have double-jointed knuckles, but it just doesn’t create the same effect with men. Instead of “Oooooh,” it’s usually more like “Ewwww.” I need to stop trying to impress people that way.

Lashley Watch: Still Going Strong

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This is three nights in a row!

Ashley Olsen and Lance Armstrong were spotted partying at NYC’s The Box on Wednesday night, while “celebrity” chef Rocco DiSpirito couldn’t get in for half an hour. “The doorman kept ignoring him and pretending he wasn’t there. It was actually really sad. He kept watching celeb after celeb being walked in.”

Three nights in a row is a big deal among the Hollywood set, people!

I guess Ashley is convenient for Lance. I mean, he can just hang a basket on his bike and keep her in that.