Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Tila Tequila Will Fuck Anything

Tila Tequila to Star in Bisexual Dating Show on MTV

Everyone’s favorite MySpace slut is coming to MTV in the country’s very first bi-sexual dating show.

Is it the world’s very first bi-sexual dating show? I’m not sure. Perhaps another country beat us to the punch. Leave it to France, I bet.

Anyway, the show will be called A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila, and debuts October 9.

It’ll work like any other dating show, except 16 of the contestants will be straight or bisexual men, and 16 will be lesbian or bisexual women.

Her singing career didn’t work out so well. So it’s nice to see Tila returning to her roots: whoring herself out for publicity.

Want more? Be sure to check out our nip slip gallery and our crotch shot gallery.

Fashion Rocks

I have to say thanks first and foremost to the random ladies who got me and my friend into the afterparty for Fashion Rocks. For some odd reason I ended up dancing next to Cuba Gooding Junior…who ended up spilling a drink on my friend.

I’m wildly hungover yet I wanted to share my lovely time with our readers. I’ll post pics tonight but in the meantime here are the highlights of the evening….

Carrie Underwood is the smallest person I have ever seen. She walked past me and literally I feel as though she has lost even more weight. Girl can SING though.

Jennifer Lopez still has got it. Watch the show tonight. Seriously.

Michelle Trachtenberg, Lydia Hearst and Levin Rambin seem to be besties. They were downing glasses of champagne even though Miss Rambin is 17. She is on “All My Children” and for some odd reason I have run into her about 4 times this week. Michelle also looked seriously strung out. She smokes parliments…and really needs a tan. I kind of was so shocked they were all hanging out.

Cuba Gooding Jr., for some odd reason wasn’t in the VIP room and he was at the party late into the evening when most of the really famous people had already left. He was dancing up a storm with an older blond lady. He is quite the dancer but it was a little odd that he stuck it out and didn’t end up at Marquee or the after parties to the after party. I mean seriously…isn’t he famous enough to get into Tenjune?

Once again…pictures will be posted in a bit. I also would like to thank the two random men that had a dance off at the Rainbow Room.

The Office Convention?

The Office Convention in Scranton, PA

Don your uniforms. Set your phasers to stun. And chart a course at Warp 6 to …

The Office convention?

I guess this stuff isn’t for Star Trek nerds anymore.

The Office is holding a convention — in Scranton, PA, of course — October 26-28.

Here’s the pitch:

The time has come for The Office fans to unite, and what better place to do it than the city that’s home to Michael Scott and the rest of the Dunder-Mifflin staff – Scranton, Pa. “The Electric City” is celebrating the best comedy on TV by inviting Dunder-heads to converge on Northeast Pa. for a full weekend of pretending to hang out with other peoples’ co-workers. Think of it like a Star Trek convention but with nerds wearing Dwight Schrute glasses instead of Spock ears.

One of the event sponsors is the Jesuit University of Scranton. I love it.

JENNA FISCHER IS SINGLE!!!

Jenna Fischer Getting a Divorce From Husband

The start of this week looked like it was all good news for the women: both Heath Ledger and Shaquille O’Neal announced their upcoming divorces. I mean, I guess it’s good news for the men if you want to have sex with Michelle Williams, but, really, who wants to have sex with Michelle Williams? She looks like a 12-year-old boy these days.

But Jenna Fischer?

She looks like the 12-year-old girl next door.

And she’s getting a divorce! From her husband! Some screenwriter you’ve never heard of!!!

As Hollywood’s elite become increasingly dissatisfied with their publicists, Jenna has, like so many others before her, turned to the Publicist Formerly Known as MySpace to break this exciting news:

We (James and Jenna) need to announce that we have chosen to separate. We are sorry for any pain this causes family and friends. The enthusiasm we have expressed for each other’s lives, spirits, and careers is real – we have been each other’s cheerleader and friend during the past six years and continue to be so now and in the future.

And a special note for our MySpace fans – We appreciate your support over the years, and would be overjoyed to have you continue supporting us both. You might be tempted to make one of us “feel better” by putting the other one down in a post. Please don’t – we still have the utmost respect for one another, and we’d have to delete you. We aren’t taking questions or doing interviews about this particular aspect of our lives. We’re also avoiding reading any press on the subject, so don’t send us any clippings or links about the split. Thank you in advance for respecting our privacy.

Okay, guys, this is your big shot. Hurry on over to Jenna’s MySpace page and post a comment reminding her of what a loser cocksucker wash-out her husband is, and, if you live in the LA area, remind her that you have a screenplay, too. It’s kind of like Entourage meets The Sopranos, right? And you totally know someone who can get it into a studio, don’t you?

Get on it, kids! This won’t last long!

Update: I feel obliged to mention that, in June, Jenna Fischer was our best guess for the married prime-time star propositioning her boyish co-star. Hmmm.