Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Oh Hells Yes: Michael Lohan Weighs in on Living Lohan

The folks at OK! magazine have done something truly genius: they are getting Michael Lohan to write a weekly blog about Living Lohan.

Oh, oh, oh!!!


Sooooo wonderful.

I enjoyed the premiere on Monday night. Heh, I loved how Dina Lohan called that blogger and was all like “I’ve already talked to my attorneys” when the only person she’d talked to was Lindsay. Angry managers are so full of shit. And I like how Ali’s so ridiculously trusting of everyone and is totally going to get burned and then get drunk and then go to rehab.

Anyway, here’s what Papa Lohan had to say:

Soooooo, you want a comment on the first episode of Living Lohan?

Well, let’s see… If I were to look at things from a wordly perspective, I would probably have a lot to say about exploitation, hypocrisy and even deception — and maybe at a later date, I might just do so.

For now, let’s just say I’m still trying to figure out if this show is about managing Ali’s career and being a “real” mother, or reading tabloids.

I’ve had a sneak peek at some future episodes and I will say that some of the people Dina surrounds the kids with still concerns me — again, I can address that when they appear on the show. I just hope Dina takes the high road — like a Lohan would — and rights these wrongs.

If this show is about the being a mother and a manager, the most important thing is to set a good example by instilling positive values, and doing what’s right for the kid’s sake. Not for our own!

I wish Ali, Cody and Dina the best on the show and pray that they get what they want out of it.

NOT Filming!

So I don’t usually run them, but there are normally like 8000 photos of Gossip Girl filming on the photo services on any given day. That’s just what happens when you film on the streets on NYC. So I see this photo, I figure it’s from filming, and I’m like “Holy shit, Serena and Dan end up getting back together!” and I was all excited, and then I was like, “Wait, isn’t the show on hiatus?” and then I checked the caption and learned that this isn’t from the set and then I was REALLY excited!

This is just Blake Lively and boyfriend Penn Badgley walking down the street in New York together. How freaking cute are they??? And how freaking cute is her skirt??? I WANT!

[Image via Splash]

Work Out Much?

Melanie Brown shows off her rock-hard abs on Miami Beach, while on vacation with hubby Stephen Belafonte.

So my trainer is always talking about getting me my “Gwyneth legs,” since I’m so obsessed with how great her legs look. I’d like to add that I now also need my “Mel B stomach.” I guess that means I will have to stop stuffing my face with avocados and stop whining when we do ab exercises. And every time I take Leo for a walk and we go uphill for any period of time I’m like, “Yay, I did my cardio,” and that probably won’t cut it either. Getting in shape is hard. :(

[Image via Splash]

Happy Birthday, Kingston!

A very pregnant Gwen Stefani hangs out with son Kingston at his second birthday party. Guests included Kate Beckinsale and Courteney Cox. And apparently some manner of huge blow-up jumpy machine. Those are the best.

Seriously I want a kid just to throw the birthday parties. And what I plan to do is buy a ton of those fun jumpy machines, those little pools filled with colored balls, and especially those awesome Velcro machines where you wear the suit and jump off a trampoline and stick to a Velcro wall. And there will be like five different cakes, and ice cream, and hot dogs, and hamburgers, and lots of Cherry Coke, and then what I will do is get a babysitter for my kid that day and invite all my adult friends to enjoy the party. Kids don’t remember that shit at that age, anyway.

[Image via Splash]

Not Divorced Yet!

Mariah and Nick looked every bit the happy couple, as they arrived at Narita airport outside of Tokyo. Mariah’s in town to do the MTV Video Music Awards Japan later this month. I hope they make her say stuff in Japanese. That would be funny.

Awww … so cute!

Jessica and Tony: Spotted on a Date

I wonder how much Papa Joe paid him to do this.

Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo were spotted at N9NE steakhouse in Dallas on Saturday.

“They were holding hands, in a good mood and happy,” says a source. “They looked like they were on a date together.”

They shared a corner booth and left together. Tony then dropped Jessica off and went to Papa Joe’s house, where he was slipped a manilla envelope full of hundred dollar bills.

Happy Memorial Day!

It’s super exciting to have the day off from work and all the varied stresses that come along with following Lindsay Lohan’s every Sapphic move — I’m on my way out to meet a friend for brunch and then watch the Jon & Kate Plus 8 marathon on my DVR for the remainder of the day — but let’s take a second and remember all the lives that were lost so that we could have a Monday off from work.

Seriously, though, while you’re out there getting wasted, or laying on the beach, or BBQ-ing, or watching TV, or shopping, or whatever, keep in mind what this holiday is about in the first place.

Thank you to all who risked and lost their lives in service to their country.