Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Disney to Miley: I Can Wait to See You Again

Miley Cyrus has pulled out of her first scheduled public appearance since those Vanity Fair photos hit the web.

Miley had been scheduled for weeks to participate in the Disney Channel Games, a charity competition taking place in Orlando on Friday.

No reason was given for her pulling out of the competition, but word on the street is that Disney is trying to keep her out of the spotlight until this I’m-a-good-role-model-if-you-want-your-fifteen-year -old-to-have-bedroom-hair-and-no-clothes thing blows over.

It’s Moving Day!

That’s right, bitches! Today is the day that me and Leo are finally free of Chez Eggplant, and get to move into our own apartment, which we will get to decorate in colors and patterns that don’t suck.

We are going to be very busy today with the move, so I probably won’t be checking in much until tomorrow.

I got the keys last night, and Leo and I went to play in the new (empty) apartment for a few minutes, during which I made a little video of Leo and me being dorks.

More pics of Leo are after the jump.

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Beyonce Pregnant?

The girls over at Hollyscoop are claiming they have it on good authority that Beyonce Knowles is “100% pregnant, which is why the couple rushed their wedding.”

Man, I love it when people say things like “100% pregnant.” The alternative is something like “Beyonce Knowles is 75% pregnant. The other quarter of the fetus is in Jessica Simpson’s uterus. Long story.”

Anyway, the source goes on to claim that everyone at Beyonce’s (still unconfirmed) wedding was well aware that she was pregnant, and that she was rushing the wedding due to her strong Christian beliefs.

If it’s true, Beyonce, we wish you all the best.

Florida Is the New Ethiopia

Sopranos star Edie Falco adopted a baby girl named Macy from Florida in February.

From Florida? In February?

Um, did I miss the major tectonic plate shift that resulted in Florida being a part of Africa? I mean, it’s not like I ever read non-celeb news, so it’s possible it just never came across my radar, but that seems unlikely, because doesn’t Jennifer Lopez own a home in Miami? I definitely would have heard about Jennifer Lopez’s Miami home and the tectonic plates beneath it moving to Africa. I’m just going to go ahead and assume that Florida is still a part of the United States, like it was the last time I took geography.

So let me get this straight, Edie. You adopted a child from America? And you didn’t immediately issue a press release?

What kind of a fucking celebrity are you? I get it, I get it. You’re embarrassed that your adopted kid isn’t from Africa. It’s kind of like when you get a new pair of jeans at Express and you like them, you really do, but you don’t really want to advertise that you got them from Express because, like, all the cool kids are wearing Paper Denim. I feel for you, Edie.

Enjoy the kiddo.