Is this just me? Every year, when the Social Security department releases its list of most popular baby names, I, like, study it. Why do I care so much? I’m not pregnant. I probably won’t be pregnant ever, because men suck, and I’ll end up adopting a little Cambodian baby and naming it Maddox and waiting around on my couch for Brad Pitt to show up and leave Angelina Jolie for me.
The most popular girl names in 2007:
Come on, people! When are you going to start naming your girls “Beet”??? I’m waiting!!!
And the most popular boy names:
I, for one, am just grateful not to see “Perez” on that list.
For male twins, parents were most likely to combine Jacob with Joshua, Matthew with Michael and Daniel with David. The most popular combination for female twins was Ella and Emma. OMG that’s so cute! Okay, I have to have female twins now so I can name them Ella and Emma! Oh, who am I kidding? I’d totally name them Ashley and Mary-Kate.
The name “Shiloh” debuted on the list this year at #804. “Maddox” is at #226. “Jayden” is at #18. “Danica” is at #307. “Paris” is at #385. And “Miley” is at #278. My real name is at #350, which was very exciting for me. I beat out Paris!!! My little sister’s name made the list in both the male AND female categories. I am going to make fun of her for that. “Dakota” is at #239. “America” is at #462. “Rocco” is at #448, and “Melvin” is at #446 (Who is naming their kid Melvin?! Stop it!!!).
Thank goodness, “Apple” doesn’t appear to have made the cut. “Moses,” however, is at #464.
And the name “Elvis”? It’s at #676.
Man, you guys, I could do this forever. I’m obsessed with this stuff. I just want to spend hours and hours researching these trends. Someone asked me tonight what my five-year plan was, and I was like “Uhhhh. Probably to develop a five-year plan?” But if this whole celebrity gossip thing doesn’t pan out, I’m going to be a baby name expert! What the hell kind of degree do you even need to do that, anyway? I need to get it, stat!
For the full list, click here.