Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Jennifer Love Hewitt: “Look How Skinny I Am!”

Sigh.

Remember when we were all calling Jennifer Love Hewitt fat, and she was all like, “I love my body just the way it is!” In fact, let me quote again what she wrote on her blog late last year:

I’ve sat by in silence for a long time now about the way women’s bodies are constantly scrutinized. To set the record straight, I’m not upset for me, but for all of the girls out there that are struggling with their body image.

A size 2 is not fat! Nor will it ever be. And being a size 0 doesn’t make you beautiful …

And like all women out there should, I love my body.

To all girls with butts, boobs, hips and a waist, put on a bikini — put it on and stay strong.

But now!

She’s lost 18 pounds!

And she’s gonna make DAMN SURE it’s cover news!

“SEE GUYS! I’M SKINNY AGAIN!!! YOU CAN SAY NICE THINGS ABOUT ME AGAIN BECAUSE I’M VALUABLE NOW!!!”

This shit pisses me off big time. Sending mixed messages like this is more dangerous than just coming out and being like, “Dude, I hate being fat and I feel disgusting when I’m fat,” like Jessica Alba did.

Shut. The fuck. Up. Jennifer.

Jennifer Aniston’s Toxic Rebound

Rumors has it that Jennifer Aniston’s new man is none other than Matt Felker — the guy from the “Toxic” video, and also Selma Blair’s ex. What is it with Jen and male models?

Also, sources are reporting that Jen dumped John — after the third time he’d cheated on her.

Apparently, Aniston gave Mayer a “three strikes and you’re out” ultimatum — after learning about his “quickie” flings with a cocktail waitress and a promoter’s assistant for his concert tour.

That was two strikes. Another dalliance, with a groupie, was the final straw for Aniston.

Uh, dude?

This is so fucked up.

What the hell are you saying about yourself when you tell your boyfriend, “Sure, you can cheat on me, but only twice.”

I mean, I doubt this is true, but if it is?

So stupid.

Behaving Herself

The once-again super-skinny Nicole Richie is hardly on the radar these days. The only time we seem to get new shots of her is when she goes to driving school. I wonder if that’s because she alerts the paparazzi when she goes to driving school so that we can all see she’s fulfilling her civic obligations, or because the paparazzi know her driving school schedule. I hate that I care.

Anyway.

Here’s Nicole going to driving school.

Is This Tommy Lee’s New Squeeze?

You might recognize this paragon of class as Daisy de la Hoya, from Rock of Love 2. It’s kind of hard to tell it’s her, because her middle finger is covering most of her absurdly Botoxed lips, which are her most recognizable feature. In fact, the lips on her face are almost better covered here than the lips between her legs. She’s just that much of a lady. But I digress.

Rumor has it that Daisy’s been dating rocker Tommy Lee recently, after previously being attached to Dave Navarro.

Meanwhile, Pamela Anderson has struck up a new relationship with a member of Abu Dhabi’s royal family. I wonder if she feels at all threatened by this new relationship. I doubt it.

Isn’t Abu Dhabi where Garfield was always trying to send poor Nermal? Also: that is the one and only thing I know about Abu Dhabi. Yup, that’s it. If someone were like, “Name one thing about Abu Dhabi or I’ll kill you” I would be like “IT WAS WHERE GARFIELD ALWAYS TRIED TO SEND NERMAL!!!” and then if they were like “Okay name one more thing about Abu Dhabi or I’ll still kill you” I’d be like “PAMELA ANDERSON IS REPORTEDLY DATING A MEMBER OF ITS ROYAL FAMILY!” and then if the mean person were like “If you can name a third thing about Abu Dhabi I’ll let you go, otherwise you die” then I would just have to die. Because we would have exhausted the list of things I know about Abu Dhabi.

Anyway.

Pamela should send Daisy to Abu Dhabi.

Quotables

“I don’t feel comfortable talking about this … because it is a complicated issue for the brand.”

The EVP of Olive Garden, when asked by the Wall Street Journal to comment on how Playmate Kendra Wilkinson has sort of made herself their unofficial spokeswoman.

I love love LOVE that the WSJ has an entire article about Kendra and the Olive Garden. They refer to her as a “rogue brand ambassador: a celebrity who is genuinely, publicly devoted to a product or service, even if he or she doesn’t quite embody the values that the brand’s managers may be trying to convey.” Ha ha ha! I love it so much.

More Trouble in Beijing!

A British journalist was dragged off and beaten up by Chinese police while trying to cover a pro-Tibet protest on Wednesday in Beijing.

This is NOT GOOD, China!!!

Police hauled John Ray, China correspondent for Independent Television News (ITN), from a park less than a mile from the Bird’s Nest stadium to a nearby restaurant, where they threw his shoes in the corner and sat on his arms. The police took this action shortly after foreign protesters unfurled a pro-Tibet banner.

“I wonder how this fits in with their solemn promise of free and unrestricted reporting,” Ray said shortly after his release. “This was a wrestling match.”

Ray, who is fully accredited to report in Beijing during the Olympic Games, said he was detained for 20 minutes and his equipment bag was confiscated despite repeated protestations – in Chinese – that he was a journalist.

He was thrown into a police van, his pants and shirt were covered in grime, and his hand was bruised from where a police officer stood on it, he said.

Cameraman Ben England was also manhandled and prevented from filming the protest by police.

NOT GOOD AT ALL!

It just raises even more questions about what’s going on in that country while the rest of the world’s not looking.

This Olympics thing may end up backfiring big time for China.