Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Kate Hudson’s Single So We Get to See Pictures of Ryder Again

Has anybody else noticed this trend?

When Kate Hudson has a boyfriend, you hardly ever see pictures of her with her son. Once she goes through a high-profile break-up, there are like 1000 pictures of her with Ryder everywhere.

It’s not that I don’t think Kate is an active, involved mother when she has a boyfriend — I think she is — but I don’t think she alerts the paparazzi every time she leaves the house with Ryder until she has a high-profile break-up. It’s like her way of saying, “See? I’m fine. I do have a man in my life. And he’ll never dump me for being too desperate. He won’t even realize what a problem it is for another 15 years or so. How jealous are you now, Lance???”

Well Look Who’s in Chicago

Lindsay Lohan made the trek to the Windy City with gal pal Samantha Ronson for Lollapalooza, where SamRo was playing DJ. Also there: Mark Ronson, Slash, Perry Farrell, and Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz.

Please make sure to click through the thumbnails. There’s a picture of Samantha Ronson, Slash and a pack of cigarettes (and his young son!) and Perry Farrell. If you look at it long enough, you can actually get a contact high.

That John McCain Ad: Worth Every Penny

I’m telling you, whatever John McCain’s campaign paid for that ad comparing Barack Obama to Paris Hilton, it was well worth it. This is by far the most that the anyone’s talked about the Republican candidate since Heidi Montag graced him with her ringing endorsement.

Up now, we have Kathy Hilton — who had previously donated to the McCain campaign — releasing this statement to the Huffington Post:

I’ve been asked again and again for my response to the now infamous McCain celebrity ad. I actually have three responses. It is a complete waste of the money John McCain’s contributors have donated to his campaign. It is a complete waste of the country’s time and attention at the very moment when millions of people are losing their homes and their jobs. And it is a completely frivolous way to choose the next President of the United States.

Silly Kathy. If America were in the habit of choosing someone for a position based on his or her merits, we never would have made Paris a celebrity, now would we?

My Adorable Mother!

As most of you readers know, my darling mother is in town visiting me for a few days. This evening, we decided to take the ferry to Bainbridge Island to have dinner. We ate at an INCREDIBLE restaurant called the Four Swallows. I know, it sounds like cheap porn, but it was actually a very, very fantastic restaurant with amazing food, service and ambiance. We absolutely adored it. I also had the opportunity to hear my mother’s opinions on table manners for the first time in soooo many months. Oh, how I’d missed hearing her musings on the way I consume my food! Apparently, I do not cut the lettuce in my salad correctly. Nor my green beans! And I will never find the kind of man I am looking for if I eat green beans like a piglet. You can all breathe a sigh of relief, though; by the time we’d finished the meal, I had mastered the art of green bean consumption to my mother’s standards.

On the ferry ride there, we kind of proved that we were tourists by standing outside on the front of the boat taking pictures while all the locals slept in booths inside.

As revenge for 26 years of listening to her bitch about the way I eat my food, I considered just being anorexic for awhile and making her pick up the hospital bill and then being like “SEE MOM? YOU SHOULD HAVE JUST BEEN HAPPY THAT I WAS EATING AT ALL!!!” But I can’t really go thirty minutes without eating, so instead I took embarrassing video of her on the ferry — dancing! — and I’m posting it here for all the world to see.

I love you, Mom!

Tomorrow, we are going to take a little road trip to Friday Harbor, so there is a chance I will not have Internet access when the photos of the Brangelina babies arrive on at 7 pm EST. This is kind of devastating to me, and I considered telling my mom to come back some other time, but, as you can see from this video, she is old and decrepit and I’m not sure how long we’ll have her around. So we’re going to take the road trip, and I’ll get the pics posted by tomorrow night. And on Monday I’ll scan in the entire 30-page spread for ya’ll! Hooray!