Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Joan and Melissa Rivers Go CRAZY on The Apprentice

FINALLY, something interesting happened on Celebrity Apprentice.

Check out the CRAZINESS that ensued after Melissa Rivers was fired by Donald Trump last night. HOLY CRAP. It’s just a game, you guys. They really took this personally. I gotta admit, though: It’s good TV. You’d think Joan and Melissa would be a little more media-savvy by now, and that they’d know how bad something like this would make them look. Then again, maybe it was a coordinated PR stunt. Nah. They’re not that good at acting.

Anybody have a link to a clip of what actually went down in the boardroom? I couldn’t find one on YouTube but I really really want to see it now!!!

Update: Here’s a clip of Melissa’s exit interview, with more stuff from the boardroom.

People Doing Things That Don’t Suck: Jay Leno

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I just adore Jay Leno. He’s such a hard worker and such a nice guy. And this story is especially heartwarming. Jay Leno is doing a free comedy show in Ohio, a state that’s been hit particularly hard by the economic crisis.

More than 2,000 people picked up tickets Monday to next month’s free comedy show by Jay Leno, who is bringing his act to southwest Ohio as a morale booster.

People in shorts, sunhats and baseball caps sat in lawn chairs or on the ground to form lines that stretched out from four entrances to the Roberts Centre, where Leno will hold his Comedy Stimulus show May 10.

Penny Tapp, 57, of Highland, arrived about 7 a.m. Monday, more than four hours before the distribution of 4,000 tickets began.

Tapp, who lost her freight delivery job in November, said Leno has a big heart for doing the show.

“It’s like stretching your arms out and hugging the community and saying ‘It’s going to be OK,’” said Tapp, who began to choke up with emotion. “I think it’s tremendously important.”

I just LOVE being able to write a story about something like this. It’s refreshing to see a celebrity do a good deed that doesn’t also reek of being a publicity stunt.

And if you like this story, you should read about the mystery donor who’s been giving millions of dollars to women-run colleges all over the country while remaining completely anonymous to everyone. Another fantastic and heart-warming story (even though I’m secretly pretty sure it’s Bernie Madoff).

Your Daily Lohan

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Some stellar shots of Lindsay, sis Aliana and their friends relaxing in the Hawaiian sun this weekend.

How high do you think Lindsay was when she did that spray-on tan? It’s practically a Rorschach test. (Side note: I think this is the first time in my life I spelled ‘Rorschach’ correctly on the first try. Applaud me.)

Let’s play a game here: What do you see in the inkblots of Lindsay’s spray tan?

What the Heck Went on with Casey Aldridge This Weekend?

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Kelly reported this weekend that Jamie-Lynn Spears’ boyfriend (and baby daddy) Casey Aldridge was in the hospital after a serious car accident in Louisiana. Casey’s been charged with careless operation of a motor vehicle (a misdemeanor). TMZ has more info about the accident, and it’s all a little fishy:

Cops tell us while Casey was heading north on the 606 in Louisiana early this morning, he swerved off the right side of the road and into a ditch, then over-corrected his turn back onto the pavement, causing the car to flip. During the flip, 3 people — including Casey — were ejected from the car.

The two others who were ejected refused medical treatment at the scene — and as we previously reported, Casey was taken to the Riverside Medical Center in Ferriday, La. due to what cops called “moderate injuries.”

As for whether alcohol was a factor, cops tell us they didn’t speak to Casey for nearly four hours after the crash — due to his hospitalization — and when they did, they found no reason to suspect he had been drinking.

Casey was charged with careless operation of a motor vehicle — a misdemeanor — and is currently recovering from his injuries at the University of Mississippi Medical Center in Jackson, Miss.

Um … what the hell went on over there? Why was Casey swerving all over the road? Why were these people not wearing their seatbelts? Why did two of them refuse medical treatment at the scene???

I want ANSWERS.

Something tells me Jamie-Lynn Spears does, too.

Jessica Biel’s Newest Movie Takes a Powder

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I am positively floored to hear this, but Jessica Biel’s new movie about the stripper with a heart, Powder Blue, is going direct to DVD.  I don’t understand how such a talent as Jessica can be put on the Blockbuster shelf over and over again.

She has another movie, Easy Virtue, that is set for limited release in May.  If it actually happens, this will be her first time on the big screen in over two years.

Personally, I maintain high hopes for Nailed, the cinematic (maybe!) masterpiece out for release later this year.  A fascinating plot in which the main character (Biel) has a nail lodged in her head that causes her to flirt with Jake Gyllenhaal.  How insulting is it to be part of a production where the storyline involves a woman who has to be impaled by a piece of hardware to show any interest in you?  Anyway, sounds like a blockbuster for sure.

May I suggest that Jessica needs a change of pace?  A stripper movie, a movie titled Easy Virtue, a movie titled Nailed.  We get it Jess-you’re sexy.  You’ve got to either go lesbian or get into a Holocaust movie if you want to advance this fledgling career of yours forward.

Can We Just Conclude That Carmen Electra Is Pregnant?

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Listen, there have been no announcements, confirmations or baby talk of any kind from Carmen Electra’s camp but let’s face it:  When Carmen Flipping Electra is wearing muumuus, and there’s a reason why those dresses make the same sound as a cow, she is sperminated.  Or recovering from an aggressive lipo session but I still vote “baby.”  After all, she did get engaged to her guitarist boyfriend (who isn’t relevant enough to get a mention on her Wikipedia page) last week.  Why did I think they already got engaged eight months ago?  I swear this already happened.

If this unfortunate dress coupled with the impending betrothal isn’t enough to convince you, how about TMZ video of Carmen refusing to wear a bikini in public?  Come on…isn’t that the equivalent of her posing with a plus sign on a pee stick?

I’d like to be the first to offer my congratulations to Electra.  Either congratulations on her upcoming bundle of joy or congratulations on her upcoming flat and perfectly sculpted tummy.  Either way.  Congrats.