Ha! So, so bad, right? Don’t worry, though—it’s not what Winona’s rocking in real life, it’s for a movie role.
Funny thing is, though, that I saw the trailers (like, the literal abode-ish trailers) for the film’s stars. The movie takes place in New Orleans, and that’s where I was for the last four-and-a-half days. I happened to look over and noticed that the trailer said “Star Waggon”, which is a big studio trailer rental company, and immediately thought, “Hmm, wonder who’s in there today?” Well, I apparently have my answer. Winona Ryder. And Jason Statham. Oh, and James Franco, too.
The film itself is called ‘Homeland’, and it’s about … well, this:
A former DEA agent moves his family to a quiet town, where he soon tangles with a local meth druglord.
It was written by Sylvester Stallone, and Winona plays the role of a drug dealer. The lord in question, I believe, is James Franco, because of course he is.
All I know? Is that Winona‘s extensions need to make sure they stay on set when girlfriend is through wrapping the film. Because wow. How terrible are they?
As you may have heard, Tim Burton is making a sequel to Beetlejuice. Seth Grahame-Smith, the screenwriter behind Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is working on a draft at the moment. Michael Keaton will be returning. Some of us are cautiously optimistic, and the majority of us are terrified at the impending ruin of our childhoods. It seems like those involved in the original might be with the majority of us.
At the Frankenweenie press junket in Anaheim on Sunday, a reporter enthusiastically told Winona Ryder that she was very excited for Beetlejuice 2 and hoped that Ryder would be in the movie. Ryder had just spent the fifteen minutes prior gushing about her emotional connection to all of her roles in Burton’s movies, with a particular emphasis on Lydia. Given that, you’d think she might be pretty enthusiastic about the new movie, or at least somewhat optimistic. Instead, her response was a heavy sigh, a roll of the eyes, and a “Yeah, that would be … great.”
Tim Burton himself seemed more optimistic about the project, but was surprisingly hands-off about the whole thing. When asked about the project, he sounded somewhat uncomfortable and gave a non-answer. “Somebody’s writing a version, but I’m sort of … not making any preconceived ideas about it, and…not over-thinking something that I haven’t seen, so I’m just kind of keeping an open mind about it and seeing what comes.” Burton said that he is passionate about every project he goes into, so he could just have his mind on other work, but it seems odd for him to be quite as distant as he is.
Well, I’m not all that sure that I want this to happen, anyway, truth be told. I mean, even if they did bring back all of the original key players (except Otho, because he’s dead), would it be as good as the first? Also, Jeffrey Jones, who played Lydia’s father, is a convicted sex offender. Remember all that? Don’t know how keen Tim Burton would be to bring in a known pee-pee toucher to what he probably hopes to be an epic installment in the Beetlejuice series.
So, as someone born in the eighties, and a definite product of the nineties, I love Winona Ryder. I, like Johnny Depp, would tattoo “Winona Forever” somewhere (discreet) on my body, and I could probably watch Edward Scissorhands, Beetlejuice, Heathers, Great Balls of Fire!, and Welcome Home, Roxy Carmichael (among many others) on loop for the rest of my life and never get sick of it. OK?
That being said, Winona-girl really needs to start owning this red carpet thing if she’s ever going to fully resurrect a career, because this skitzy, mousy “Eek! I’m here and I’m going to just clutch my clutch like it’s going to save my life” presence is really, really bad. I still love the wide-eyed innocence that Winona is so good at exuding (unless that’s Xanax, and in that case, Winona … let’s try some uppers for a change, eh?), but she really, really needs to come a bit more out of her shell so we can begin, again, to fully appreciate how amazing Winona Ryder really is.
What do you guys think—Winona Ryder’s recent red carpet appearance?