Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Spencer Pratt

Heidi Montag’s Mom Mourning The Spiritual Death Of Her Daughter

Heidi Montag’s mom has been talking to People about the destroyed relationship between her and her daughter and honestly, I can’t blame her. If something came out of your vagina and then twenty-three years later it had a new face, I think you’d be experiencing feelings of loss, too.

According to Heidi’s mom, Darlene, Heidi has refused to speak to her since she and the rest of the family gave her such a hard time regarding her major plastic surgery. Darlene even flew to Los Angeles to try and reconcile with her daughter, but Heidi actually called the police on her. The girl called the police on her own mom!

The loss of her daughter has been as hard as you would imagine it to be.  Darlene told People, “I haven’t slept in months. I had to go get a prescription for sleeping pills just to be able to go to sleep at night to the point that I didn’t even know how I would even make it another day. I’ve been mourning the loss of a child and, yeah, it hurts. It hurts more than I thought it could hurt.”

It’s hard to feel bad for these MTV famewhores, but at the same time, it’s easy to imagine Heidi’s mother’s pain. Can you imagine if you sent your 18 year old daughter to college just outside of San Francisco, and within six months she dropped out, was living with a former Laguna Beach castmember, dating Brody Jenner’s best friend who she would wind up marrying just a year and a half later and then she comes home with a new face? And boobs for days!? I don’t know what kind of reaction Heidi expected from her mother, but I think a mix of shock and horror is the absolute least she could have planned for.

I hope now that Heidi and Spencer are divorcing that Heidi will reconcile with her family. With no friends, no man and no original part of her body still in tact, what does this girl have left?

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt Let Their Dogs Shit All Over Their Home

‘Cause that’s not fucking disgusting or anything. Jaysus. Some might automatically associate celebrity (even the lowest form of celebrity) with cleanliness or godliness or something, but it’s clear that these two don’t have a clue as to how to manage a career, let alone a hygienic home.

According to Life & Style magazine, the power-couple are collectively hardcore “hoarders,” not so unlike Lindsay Lohan, but instead of hoarding unused expensive shit, they hoard dog shit. And Spencer forces Heidi to clean it up:

The insider shares frightening never-before-seen photos of their actual home far from Hollywood in LA’s Pacific Palisades area. The kitchen and living room are filled with Spencer’s crystals, stacks of his screenplays and junk everywhere. “Their four dogs aren’t housebroken,” an insider tells Life & Style. “They go to the bathroom all over the house. Heidi is sometimes near tears at the dogs’ mess, but Spencer just orders her to pick it up.”

Heidi’s probably used to picking shit up, as it were. Spencer seems rather rabbit-like in his appearance and we all know how those fuckers just drop shit behind them after every sudden movement they happen to make.

Dude, I’ve met people like this. They walk the walk, they talk the talk and wear (and buy) the nicest stuff. You’d think they’ve got it all together, but in reality, they’re a dead mess. Their countertops are stacked with week-old dirty dishes, there’s empty food containers shoved under the sofa and all they have in the fridge is old soy sauce packages — maybe a few duck sauces if they’re lucky. Laundry’s left in piles that one can only decipher clean from dirty by taking a deep whiff of the fabric. Gross, man. Just gross.

I know these two don’t have two brain cells to rub together (and could you imagine the nuclear fallout if they did?), but come on. It’s not so hard to understand that when things start to stink, they should be thrown away.

Spence, you’re going to make some big bucks off of your newest protege, Slimy Salami or whatever Snooki’s ex’s name is, hire a damned maid or something.

If I Told You Spencer Pratt Was Producing a Show Called Fist Pumping 4 Love, You Would Think I Was Kidding, Right?

Yeah, well. I’m not.

Spencer Pratt is indeed shopping around this reality show that he’s developed with Emilio Masella. You know, Snooki’s ex-boyfriend that she dumped over voicemail?

The trailer is laughable and not in the way that they’re going for. The production quality and editing are so budget and this Emilio character not only fails to leave me wanting more, he leaves me hoping that I never see his face again.

It’s no wonder Spencer’s attracted to working with him, though. Emilio gained his fame by sponging off a hugely successful MTV reality star… Sound familiar?