Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Sammi Giancolo

Snooki’s Friends from Jersey Shore Are So Happy for Her

A photo of Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi

Of course those lovable guidos and guidettes are happy for Snooki! Why wouldn’t they be? She’s having a baby! What could possibly be wrong with that?

First, Pauly D spoke up about how excited he is for Snooki’s new arrival:

“Crazy! I’m real excited,” Pauly told MTV News about his pal’s impending motherhood. “You want to know why? I love babies! I love everything about them, when they’re not yours. So I’ll take care of it, spoil it and then when it’s crying, give it back to Snooki.”

It seems that Pauly isn’t the only one excited by the “Shore” crew’s first baby; the mama-to-be is also pretty stoked. “She’s excited,” he shared about Snooki. “She loves it. She’s always wanted kids. I want to be at the delivery room.”

While the baby’s daddy is most definitely Jionni, Pauly laughed that Snooki’s fling with Vinny had him worrying he might be a dad in the near future. “He’s counting the months,” Pauly joked about Vinny doing the conception math. “At first he was, but then he’s like, ‘It’s no way in the world, it’s no way. It’s gotta be Jionni’s. It’s gotta be.’ Aw, man, congratulations Vinny!” Pauly laughed.

Oh God, what if it is Vinny‘s kid? Or worse, what it the baby comes out looking just like a tiny little Situation? That’s a horrible, horrible thought, so I’ll just start thinking about how good the Snooki Delivery Special will be when it airs on MTV. Pauly will hit on nurses and other pregnant ladies, and Deena would try out something in an IV somewhere. It will be such a glorious piece of art, it really will.

But before we get too far ahead of ourselves, let’s also check out what good ol’ Sammi Sweetheart had to say about her friend’s pregnancy and engagement, and, of course, the wedding:

“I think for Nicole, I can see her having a cheetah or zebra print-themed wedding because she loves animal print,” roomie Sammi “Sweetheart” Giancola told us today while promoting the upcoming season finale of Jersey Shore (airing March 15 at 10 p.m. on MTV). “I’m excited for them. I just can’t wait to party for the wedding and do all the fun things she has coming in her life now.”

Sammi already has some GTL-inspired baby gifts in mind.

“If it’s a boy maybe some hair gel,” she laughed. “If it’s a girl, maybe some baby bronzer. I think it’s definitely going to be Jersey-themed.”

“Snooki is going to be a fun parent,” Sammi added.

And for any Snooki haters out there, Sammi’s got some words for you.

“It’s not like she’s 16 and pregnant,” she said. “She’s doing her thing, she’s living her life and I just think she’s blessed. I can’t wait to see a little guido or guidette running around. I just think it’s going to be so exciting.”

Yeah, it’s not like she’s 16 and pregnant, ok? It’s just that she’s 24 and probably an alcoholic, that’s what’s worrisome.

How are you guys feeling right now? Are you settling in to a world that will soon contain Snooki’s offspring yet?

Quotables: Sammi from Jersey Shore Posing for Playboy?

A photo of Sammi Giancola

“My boobs are real, they will sag to the floor. I just feel weird about my boobs. … But I don’t know. I don’t know if that’s the right direction you want to go in.”

- Jersey Shore‘s Sammi Sweetheart responds to the timeless question “would you ever show them boobies in a nudey mag?”

You know, Sammi said that she wasn’t sure if she would ever do something like pose for Playboy, but I think she would in a heartbeat. For one thing, I think that whenever somebody gets all jokey and wishy washy when asked a question, then they’re lying. For another, it seems like Sammi is just flat out fishing for compliments about her weird, real, saggy boobs, and if she got the right amount of sweet-talking, she’d show anything. And for another thing, I kind of just want it to happen.

I know! I feel really gross for thinking this, but I think Sammi is a really attractive lady, and if given the chance to see her in Playboy, I would definitely look. And it’s not because I’m a perv! Ok, it’s not just because I’m a perv, it’s also because she’s always so awkward and uncomfortable in any situation that isn’t getting into a domestic dispute with her boyfriend on camera, and I’d be interested to see how that pans out in photographs.

Does anybody understand where I’m coming from on this one? Please? I’m welcoming you to creep here, so I’d grab this opportunity if I were you: would you want to see Sammi “Sweetheart” Giancola do a spread for Playboy? What about J Woww? No, I know, Snooki! You want to see Snooki strut her stuff in the buff!

Which one will it be, folks? And don’t say Deena because then I’ll know you’re just fibbing.

The 5 Best (and Worst!) ‘Stars Without Makeup’ of 2011

photo of miley cyrus pictures photos pics
Ah, how often we forget that celebrities are actually “real” people, much like we are, and how grafitying it can be to see them doing normal things like going to the gym, buying coffee, and wearing hats to try and disguise just how normal they are.

Here’re the 5 Best Celebrities Without Makeup of 2011:

#5 – Sammi Giancola
photo of sammi giancola jersey shore no makeup hot pics
So, right, I realize that she’s not technically without makeup, but compared to what she *usually* looks like, this is as bare-faced as it gets, guys.

#4 – Miranda Kerr
photo of miranda  kerr no  makeup pics photos
This one is kind of a given, because if you’re a Victoria’s Secret supermodel, you’re contractually obligated to look like this. OF COURSE she’s going to show up on the “good” side of this list somewhere.

#3 – Khloe Kardashian
photo of khloe kardashian no makeup pics
Some of you probably think that it’s a joke, or a mistake, that Khloe ended up on this side of the post, but compared to her older drama queen sisters, Khloe-sans-makeup is refreshing enough to make you forget that she doesn’t look all that great in comparison to what she looks like with makeup. So in the paradox world of the Kardashians, that makes her look AMAZING in the real world.

#2 – Kirstie Alley
photo of kirstie alley no makeup pictures photos
Here’s another one that might have you scratching at your head, but Kirstie here is included on the ‘Best’ list because she looks her AGE. And she goes out in public not really giving a f-ck about what people think about her face, and that’s probably more attractive than most of the plasticky people we talk about overall.

#1 – Jennifer Love Hewitt
photo of jennifer love hewitt pictures no makeup photos
Bitch please. Did you think you were going to escape 2011 without at least one more “I LOVE JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT” post?

Jump in for the worst!

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Stars Without Makeup: Sammi “Sweetheart” Giancola

photo of sammi sweetheart giancola pictures photos pics
Oh. My God. Oh my God. Look at this, will you? There’s a chick from Jersey Shore that’s *actually* a natural beauty. I could seriously just fall all over myself and die. No weird, sculpted facial augmentations, no diarrhea diets to enhance the cheeks (both of them), no plaster of Paris injections to look like a weird work of “art” … I’m kind of at a loss for words.

Sammi Giancola is actually, legitimately pretty, and just might have a chance of rising above the trashiness of her reality show. If, you know, she could lay off the douchebag pencil-dick boyfriend and quit hanging around with twits like Deena Cortese, Nicole Polizzi, and Jenni Farley. And learns some proper grammar and stops talking like a gutter rat. And stops …

Never mind. You’re right. Girlfriend doesn’t stand a chance.

She sure is something to look at though, huh?

Sam and Deena from Jersey Shore Did A Commercial!

Have any of you seen this? Because I haven’t. Apparently this commercial for those shady energy shots premiered a couple of weeks ago, but it still needs to be officially shared.

Have I mentioned lately how much I love Jersey Shore? I’ve been rewatching it from the beginning because I’m sick so pretty much all I’ve felt like doing for the past little bit is lay in bed, catch you guys up on the world around us, hang out with my little guinea pig, and watch the uncensored episodes of Jersey Shore. And trust me, I feel like a queen for it.

But anyway, who’s going to buy these energy products based on Deena Cortese and her many talents?!