Listen, blondie. We can still see you.
Try as you might to hide yourself behind your new boyfriend Ryan Phillippe, we can still see you.
I am sure that, ordinarily, you are great at hide-and-seek. You can hide behind things like trees and light poles and mailboxes and stop signs. You can probably fold yourself to fit into small compartments. You can shimmy into the narrowest crawlspaces. I have no doubt.
But if you really don’t want to look like you’re the girl currently dating Ryan Phillippe, I recommend just walking forward like a normal person, doing your very best to not duck and hide behind Ryan Phillippe. Because the ducking, that is what actually looks suspicious.
Worse, it makes you look like you’re embarrassed to be dating Ryan Phillippe—almost as if you wouldn’t be caught dead dating Ryan Phillippe.
Unless… whoa, wait a minute! Oh, no! Are you embarrassed to be dating Ryan Phillippe? Oh, hon! I understand. I do. In that case, go ahead and hide.
(Gallery via Celebuzz.)
December 23, 2011 at 10:30 am by Jenn
I could tell just how worried everyone was yesterday when you learned that Ryan Phillippe was ending his acting career. I was in the exact same boat – what, you think just any pretty boy can do the kind of work Ryan did in MacGruber? – but now we can file yesterday away as just a terrible, disturbing dream and go back to watching Cruel Intentions for the 57th time, because Ryan’s not going anywhere:
Despite a report that Ryan Phillippe is planning on quitting acting, a rep for the actor told Access Hollywood.com that is actor is, in fact, not retiring from Hollywood anytime soon. “He’s been talking about expanding his talents to producing and directing, but he has no plans to stop acting nor did he ever say that he was considering doing so,” his rep told Access.
I don’t believe I’ve ever let out such a sigh of relief. Whoever misconstrued Ryan’s original statement to make it seem like he was going to hide his light under a bushel basket should be very strongly reprimanded for causing such agony. Are you getting my heavy-handed sarcasm yet? Nobody cares about Ryan Phillippe, but he’s going to keep on truckin’ anyway. That’s what this has all been about, and, in a way, that’s the the saddest part of all.
April 26, 2011 at 12:30 pm by Emily
“I think I’m going to end my acting career. I’m so introverted. I’m ready to go behind the scenes. I’m 36 years old, but I’ve been doing this for 20 years. It’s so hard to go out in L.A. I’m going to move. I’m going to spend a third of my year in New York.”
Cue the sad and dramatic violin music as we all weep bitter tears that Ryan Phillippe will no longer be stunning us with performances such as that in I Know What You Did Last Summer, Crash, and his latest stint on WWE Raw.
Catch you later, boyfriend.
April 25, 2011 at 10:30 am by Sarah
Reese Witherspoon, who’s been dating that Jim Toth agent guy for awhile now, has confirmed to her fans that she, yes, is engaged. Toth apparently proposed over the Christmas break and Reese happily obliged.
Jim seems like a cool guy and what not, and he’s not hard on the eyes, but she used to wake up next to Jake Gyllenhaal. And she kicked him to the curb.
I’ll be honest – I heaved a humongous sigh of relief when the Witherspoon/Philippe marriage went belly-up, because ever since I Know What You Did Last Summer, I thought that Ryan Philippe was the height of deep-voiced pretentiousness and no one like that deserves to woo and win the heart of Miss Sweet Home Alabama. Except Jake Gyllenhaal.
And when she did move on to Jake, good old long-term relationship Jake Gyllenhaal, sparks of happiness were emitted from my cold, bitchy heart and I thought, ‘Yes, this is a celebrity relationship that I could really sink my teeth into.’ But you know what? It all comes to an end eventually.
So on that note, congratulations, Reese, Jim. But bear in mind my sage offering of advice that, indeed, nothing good on this earth lasts.
Can’t wait to see photos of your wedding!
December 29, 2010 at 6:30 am by Sarah
They shop at IKEA!
Abbie Cornish and Ryan Phillippe did some low-cost shopping for their gazillion-dollar Bev Hills home on Monday at the famous Swedish home store. Among the items purchased: a $99 standing mirror.
At least we know they can’t mount that on their ceiling.
Image via Bauer-Griffin
January 20, 2009 at 9:09 am by Evil Beet
Ryan Phillippe is in Australia to spend the holidays with the woman who broke up his marriage, actress Abbie Cornish. Ryan will spend Christmas with Abbie’s family in Sydney. His kids will be with their mom, Reese Witherspoon, and her boyfriend Jake Gyllenhaal.
And I doubt there’s any truth to the rumors that Abbie’s preggers, as the pic above was taken today in Sydney at the Calvin Klein show, where Abbie reportedly sipped champagne all night.