Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Roseanne

Quotables: Roseanne Got Roasted

“In 1985, Roseanne went on Johnny Carson, which is every comic’s dream back then. She killed, he laughed his ass off, he gave her a thumbs up and he invited her to sit on his couch. She got validation from the king which can never be taken away from her. And I just want to say, Rosanne, you were my Johnny Carson. And thank you for...

Stars Without Makeup: Roseanne Barr

Roseanne recently posted a self-portrait on Twitter and captioned it ever-so-gracefully, “Fat old Jew,” when in actuality, I think she looks pretty good for turning sixty this year. Yeah, you know, it’s not the most flattering of photos, but then again, unless you’re ninety-five pounds soaking wet, anyone‘s going to...

Roseanne for President: For Real This Time!

I say “for real this time” because way back in August, I told you that Roseanne had announced that she was running for president. Back then, she insisted that she was serious about running so that she could “speak on behalf of the taxpayers of this country who r dissed 2 the max.” Before that, in 2010, Roseanne went to...

Quotables: Roseanne Is Such A Hero

“I am old now: gray, wrinkled, tired, and bloated, and my joints ache, too. But I am ready to come into my full destiny—as my childhood dreams predicted—as a Neo-Amazonian Pirate Queen of my own vessel: firing cannonballs at the worldwide culture of patriarchy in the name of all that does not suck. I no longer fear moving on to a better...