I’m usually all about letting Rolling Stone dictate the choices of what’s in and what’s out in the music world, but lately I feel like they’re turning into the print version of MTV: shitty music, glamorized shitheads like Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi, and articles about, well … What are supposed to be Important Musical Icons Like Rihanna and Katy Perry. Win, RS win.
This time around, they’ve gone and compiled a list of the worst songs of the nineties, and I have to say that a lot of the songs featured on the list were probably some of the better songs of the nineties, especially if you weren’t into Soundgarden, Pearl Jam, or the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
The list, according to Rolling Stone:
#10 – 4 Non Blondes, What’s Up
Yep, I definitely love this song. It’s an epic karaoke song (like you don’t like karaoke) and it was a huge hit of the nineties. Everyone loved 4 Non Blondes, even if they didn’t want to admit it. Also, almost two decades later, it still kicks ass and gets people going. That’s got more staying power than some vapid Jersey Shore twat.
#9 – Right Said Fred, I’m Too Sexy
Please. Who doesn’t adore this song. Gay men, straight men, gay women, straight women … it’s all relative and the song fits really any occasion. I dare you to go into any club around the world (or at least in the States) and not see an overwhelming positive reaction when the first few bars of the song plays.
#8 – Baha Men, Who Let the Dogs Out
I agree with this – this song is positively horrible and should never have been let out. But also, this song came out in 2000, not in the nineties, so I’m calling null and void. Even though it was written in 1998, it wasn’t a single ’til the millennium. So there.
#7 – Celine Dion, My Heart Will Go On
Yeah, this is a pretty bad song, and I flip the knob on my car radio rather forcefully when it has the audacity to appear on my programmed favorites, but it was also the song for an epic film, Titanic, and if that doesn’t give you some good memories of being a pre-teen or a teenager, then your heart is a piece of cold, hard stone. Either that, or you never saw Titanic.
#6 – Hanson, MmmBop
I’m not going to lie – this song was one of those songs that you either loved or hated; there was no middle ground. I was a huge Hanson fan even now, when I hear this song play softly as grocery store muzak, tingles of joyful
childhood teenage reminiscing run down my spine. It’s either that or after-effects of the epidural that I got during delivery of my daughter four years ago.
Jump in for the rest of the friggery: