Today's Evil Beet Gossip
North West

Kanye West let North West ruin an Hermes purse for Kim’s birthday

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Kim Kardashian recently turned howeverthehellmany years old, and for her birthday, she got a one-of-a-kind gift from husband Kanye West and more importantly, from their daughter North. They gave her a very fancy, artist-designed Hermes bag that cost thousands and thousands of dollars… only really it was North who had painted all over it and Kim is just dumb.

From People:

“Kanye had a box, a purse, this Hermès purse, and I opened it and I thought it was so cool. It was all painted really cool and then there was my computer and it said, ‘Press Play,’ ” Kardashian shares.

“I pressed play and my daughter was sitting outside painting the purse,” she explains. “I thought it was an artist that painted the purse, some custom thing. I thought it was some new artist, and it was my daughter. It was amazing and I have it all on video.”

Yes, you read that right. Kim Kardashian is unable to tell the difference between a custom designed bag from a real designer and something her 1-year-old threw some paint all over. God bless us everyone.

Also, only the Kardashian/West family would ever think it’s wonderful to deface a four figure bag with an infant’s art skills.

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Kim Kardashian Says She’s Gonna Make North West Get A Job

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Kim Kardashian loves to spoil her daughterNorth West, but she claims that she’s gonna make her get to work as soon as she’s old enough. Yeah, right. I’m not buying this bullshit for a goddamn second. But anyway, here’s what she said, via E!:

I was saying that earlier to my friends, ‘I wonder what [North's] first job is gonna be.’ And they were like, ‘What? She’s gonna have a job?’ and I was like, ‘Are you kidding me? Of course she is. She will have to work for what she wants.’

Maybe she’ll be a designer. Who knows? It’s too early to tell.

Are you rolling your eyes yet? Want to roll them harder? Here she is claiming that her parents made her work for everything in life:

I saved up for this Dolce & Gabbana dress I really wanted, or like in high school these Prada shoes that my parents wouldn’t buy me. And I remember they were $400, and I had to save for the entire year to get them. We didn’t get anything, we had to get a job if we wanted it. So I was working in a clothing store and I would save and save.

What is this revisionist history bullshit? What is she even talking about? I’m not buying this goddamn story for one goddamn second. Am I annoyed? Yeah, absolutely. I don’t believe any of the shit she’s saying. Does anyone else?

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North West plays with dolls of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West

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Kim Kardashian and Kanye West get bored of parenthood often enough that they leave daughter North West at home with doll replicas of themselves to play with since they can’t be bothered to be there and play with her themselves.

Some people might think this is pretty cute, but I think it’s ridiculous and narcissistic and everything that’s wrong with this entire family. Your daughter needs her parents, not cloth doll version of them and a handful of nannies to watch her while you swan off to get your tits out in Paris in the name of “fashion” or rant on stage, or whatever the hell it is they do. I seriously fear for this child’s future if this is the kind of people she’s being raised (or not raised) by.

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North West is already following in the Kardashian family footsteps

north west CR fashion book

Surprise! Kim Kardashian is already putting her 13-month-old daughter North West out on the Hollywood ho stroll, just like Mama Kris did to her all those years ago. You see, Kim and Kanye are super private people who are protective of their daughter and want her to choose whether or not she wants to be famous and in the spotlight when she’s old enough to do so… which is why they’ve had her modeling in Caroline Roitfeld’s fall issue of CR Fashion Book.

So what on earth is this miniature human wearing? Well, she’s donning a Chanel brooch, Lorraine Schwartz diamond studs and her picture has a classic Karl Lagerfeld quote next to it: “It’s never too early to start caring about fashion!” Some would, of course, disagree.

This poor, poor child. Every time I see her, I feel worse and worse for the life she’s destined to live.

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Kanye West is afraid North West will get electrocuted by a drone while swimming

kim kardashian kanye west house

Kanye West‘s testimony at his Los Angeles assault trial against a paparazzi is just too fucking rich, man. While yesterday we heard that he claimed he’s the smartest celebrity there is, today we hear of his deep-seated fears: that paparazzi will fly drones over his house, lose control of said drones and then crash them into the pool while his 1-year-old daughter is swimming, thereby electrocuting her to death. Uh…

From TMZ:

In the depo … Kanye sarcastically asks the photog’s lawyer, “Is your daughter stalked by like drones? Are there drones flying where she’s trying to learn how to swim at age 1?”

Kanye goes on … “Wouldn’t you like to just teach your daughter how to swim without a drone flying? What happens if a drone falls right next to her?  Would it electrocute her?”

As for how that could happen, Kanye says, “Could it fall and hit her if that paparazzi doesn’t understand how to remote control the drone over their house?”

Oh, dear. I mean… what? I suppose this goes a ways in explaining why he and Kim just abandoned the house they were renovating to buy a new one for $20 million in Hidden Hills, California. It has its own vineyard, two spas, two swimming pools, two barbeque centers (JEALOUS) and is set on 3.5 acres of land. More money than sense, I’ve always said.

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Kanye West has a special guest in the studio

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Okay, as much as I can’t stand her parents, you have to admit that little North West is absolutely adorable. And she’s getting so big! Kim Kardashian posted this photo of his special guest with Kanye West in the studio online over the weekend in an attempt to prove that he and Kim do actually spend time with their child. I do have a slight concern that poor North never seems to be smiling, but would you?

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North West learns how to walk so she can get away from Kim Kardashian

kim kardashian north west

North West recently celebrated her first birthday – they grow up so fast, don’t they?! – and she’s learning how to walk. Apparently after a swim lesson yesterday, she took her first steps, prompting Kim Kardashian to post the above photo on Instagram to share her happy news and say how proud she and Kanye are of their daughter.

I’m actually surprised Kim didn’t miss North’s first steps because she was too busy taking pictures of her own ass. Small miracles.

Now that North can walk, however, that means she’ll be able to run, soon. Once she can, I recommend she runs straight out the front door of their house and as far away from her insane parents as possible.

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