1The One Where Nicole Kidman Pees on Zac Efron and We’re All Supposed to Cheer

No wonder Zac has such a public hard-on for Nicole. It’s all coming together now! She pissed on his face, and he’s been sprung ever since!

From Contact Music:

The scene takes place after Efron’s character, Jack, storms off in a fury of teenage angst. He swims out to sea to calm himself down but gets stung by a jellyfish in the process. Kidman pushes aside a group of girls who are about to pee on his stings and does it herself.
Matthew Mcconaughey (‘The Lincoln Lawyer’), who plays Jack’s brother, insists that that is the correct way to treat a jellyfish sting, while John Cusack (‘Being John Malkovich’), who plays a prisoner in correspondence with Kidman, remarks ‘Of all the things in the movie that are shocking, that was kind of a light scene!’

People who protested to the screening at Cannes Film Festival included Empire’s Nick de Semlyen who posted on Twitter, ‘Did not wake up today expecting to almost instantly see Nicole Kidman p*ssing on Zac Efron’s face. Thanks for that, The Paperboy.#Cannes.’

See what happens here? Zac Efron gets a taste (um, literally) of the A-list and he thinks he’s all Don Juan DeMarco now. It’s the only other explanation for all of his silly little interviews talking about the simplicity of taking off bras and dropping MAGNUM condoms on the red carpet during photo calls … it’s all starting to gel for me, and I have to say—I couldn’t be laughing harder right now.

And the recent write-up in People makes this whole thing even funnier:

The movie, directed by Lee Daniels (Precious), is set in Florida in 1969 amid racial strife. Efron is 20-year-old Jack, the younger brother of a journalist (played by Matthew McConaughey) who has come back to his family’s small town to investigate whether a man was wrongly condemned to death row. Kidman’s character is fixated on the inmate.

In one early scene, Kidman tears off her pantyhose and has an orgasm while visiting the prisoner (played by John Cusack) on death row. Later, her character urinates on Efron on a beach after he is stung by jellyfish.

Of the film, Zac says:

“I don’t think I was supposed to feel comfortable,” he explained of the revealing [white underwear] shoot. “It’s like life. This character is supposed to be learning the ways of the world, and that can be very uncomfortable. But it’s also exciting.”

Oh, honey, of course it is. You’re twenty-four years old. Let’s just see how you feel about being peed on by a sixty-year-old when you’re forty, though, OK? Then we’ll go on and talk about the ways of the world, alright, sweetheart?

May 25, 2012 at 11:30 am by Sarah

1MORE Blind Items REVEALED: Liev Schreiber Punched Sean Penn

You guys, I almost totally forgot! The Entertainment Lawyer who scribes Crazy Days and Nights is finally “naming names,” as is his hallowed New Year’s Day tradition.

Emily hit on some of the year’s best, most salacious scandals, but you guys! THERE IS SO MUCH MORE.

- Now we know for sure: Lea Michele is starting to behave like a real diva.

- Chris Brown is kind of a dickwad—a “Don’t you know who I am?” kind of dickwad.

- Stars who hate each other: Rob Lowe and Amy Poehler, Evan Rachel Wood and Kate Winslet.

(more…)

January 2, 2012 at 12:30 pm by Jenn

3Love It or Leave It: Nicole Kidman Is Not OK

There is something wrong with Nicole Kidman, you guys.  You can tell because of this ensemble and also by what she’s doing to her face. Now, I could talk for a while about her face, but her face is neither here nor there (it is, in fact, lost in time and space*, floating through the cosmos in a place where it can never be seen again).  No, right now we are going to talk about the atrocity that she decided to put on her body for last night’s CMT Awards.  Gag me with a fucking spoon.

If you guys could analyze everything that’s wrong with this whole picture while I curl up in a ball and try to will myself to die, I would really appreciate it.

*And in meaning.  Rocky Horror, everybody.

June 9, 2011 at 11:30 am by Emily

0Nicole Kidman Figured Out How to Work YouTube

Whoa, girl. Just whoa.

Nicole Kidman‘s gone and joined the twentieth century by opening up a YouTube account (LOLZ) and sending candid, totally unstaged, unscripted messages to her fans for supporting her and appreciating her for all of these years and whatever.

I couldn’t really decipher a lot of what she was saying, since she’s got such a breathy, little girl voice and I don’t have the best hearing as it is, but judging by her facial expressions, she did a smart and avoided the Botox injections this week. Good on you, girl. I’m glad you’re opening up and talking to your fans, now, but let’s move into the current century and at least open up a Twitter if you’re going to do this sort of shameless self-promotion.

June 8, 2011 at 9:30 am by Sarah

2Quotables: Nicole Kidman on New Baby, Faith

“I wanted to be able to tell everybody because I was so excited about her. We just decided this was our thing together. It kind of just perpetuated itself … [And] it protects her and it protects everyone in the situation.”

So Kidman and husband, Keith Urban, had a child born via surrogate at the end of December, if you hadn’t already heard, and kudos to them for keeping something this big a secret, right? I guess, though, when you use a surrogate, or adopt, like Sandra Bullock, you don’t have to worry all that much about letting the cat out of the bag – it’s not as if you’re being spotted with a bump.

Also, Nicole and Keith named the new baby girl Faith Margaret, which I rather like. It’s old-fashioned, it’s sweet, and it makes me think of red-haired Southern belles baking peach pies in the kitchen. In addition?  I think the Kidman-Urbans have a deep appreciation for religion or church at the very least – their first child, Sunday? New baby, Faith? It speaks for itself maybe.

January 31, 2011 at 8:00 am by Sarah

19Nicole Kidman’s Plastic Surgery Transformation (1991-Present)

There’s no doubt that Nicole Kidman, who recently became a mom for the fourth time, is a gorgeous woman. There’s also no doubt that Nicole has touched up her face quite a bit over the years. As you flip through the gallery below, notice how her face seems to tighten up around the year 2000. Maybe homegirl got a facelift after seeing her slightly aging face in her 1999 Vogue spread?

And then there’s the occasional baggy spot on her face when everything else is tight enough to bounce a quarter off of. Usually when you see that it means that a lesser amount of Botox was injected into those droopy parts than in the rest of the face and the treatment has worn off.

Also, see that quirky dent in her upper lip in the “before” picture up top? Well, sometimes it’s there and sometimes it’s not. That probably means she’s been occasionally stuffing her lips with Restylane or another temporary filler.

There’s no shame in your plastic surgery game, Nicole, but don’t think we haven’t noticed.

January 19, 2011 at 12:30 pm by Molls