Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Mila Kunis

PHOTOS: Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher Aren’t Hooking Up, No Way, No How

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Because there’s absolutely nothing to be said about two “friends” sucking face at one of those friends’ film wrap parties, Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher are absolutely not hooking up.

Now that we have this out of the way, I can tell you—this is Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis sucking face and generally grinding all over one another at the wrap party for that Steve Jobs movie, in which Ashton Kutcher plays the role of late Steve Jobs.

Nothing to see here, folks (except what’s in the gallery). Let’s just keep the line moving, shall we?

WATCH THIS: The ‘Oz the Great and Powerful’ Trailer is Here and James Franco’s Head Did Not Dominate, Thankfully

Alright, so, all James Franco aside, this movie looks like it’s going to be phenomenal.

But don’t take it from me—take it from Sam Raimi, who’s (Sam Raimi is a demigod in some circles, being that he was the mastermind behind ‘Evil Dead’, which, if you haven’t seen it, GO NOW) directing the flick. From the movie’s Comic Con panel:

Sam Raimi on ‘Oz’: “This is a very straightforward family picture. I would say it’s a very classically Disney type of movie. It’s all about these characters and their interactions with each other, the friendships they make. How some characters are sinners, how they hurt others, how those sins can grow. It’s about finally recognizing the things you do in this world have consequences, and how to be the best person you can be is really the story of this film. That’s the most exciting kind of story for me, the ones that have character growth, and I think James Franco’s character has a little bit of character growth in this film.”

Mila Kunis on working with Sam Raimi: “Listen, Sam is fantastic. I don’t know where to begin. I would do craft service for Sam if he asked me to.”

Michelle Williams on Sam Raimi, also: “I had never made a movie like this before. I’ve never made such a big movie before. I didn’t know what it was going to be like. I didn’t know if the things that concern me, Sam would have time for, or patience for. Not only did he have time and patience in the beginning when we were rehearsing, he had patience for them on the 17th hour of the sixth day. For me it was a very holistic experience; it was a real melding of my work life and my personal life. My film family and my real family.”

Raimi, on James Franco: “He’s a great collaborator. James was much less collaborative when I first worked with him. He was a real serious actor, I think he still had his James Dean hat on; he was doing it his way. I worked with him with certain limitations. We couldn’t communicate about everything as deeply as we did on this picture. [In this movie] there was a great sense of openness, collaboration, and patience. Now that James is a filmmaker, he understands all the things that go into a shot. He’s developed that patience.”

On the flying monkeys in ‘The Wizard of Oz’, and whether they will have a part in ‘Oz’: “The teaser they showed today, the Wicked Witch has an army of flying baboons. We’re actually still developing them, but the teaser demanded that they come out right now. There is also a flying monkey in the story, different than the baboons, a nice flying monkey, so don’t worry.”

On whether the book Wicked was thrown around in the idea of developing this movie: “No. We were just using Baum’s books as a road map. We stayed with the thesis: who is that guy behind the curtain?”

So. Are we all in agreement that this movie’s going to be pretty darn fabulous? Because duh, it is.

Mila Kunis Evades More Questions About Ashton Kutcher

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It’s funny that we were just talking about Mila this past weekend and the potential that she’s dating Ashton Kutcher (well, no, I guess it’s not all that funny or uncommon or anything, because we *are* a celebrity gossip site on which we *do* gossip about celebrities) because look oh look—there’s another Mila Kunis interview in which she defends her “hanging out” with Ashton Kutcher and claims that she’s definitely, definitely not doing anything that’s not on the up-and-up with him. Ha. Up-and-up. HA.

Here’s Mila‘s latest interview with Elle, where it’s pretty much more of the same—”I’m not sexy,” “I’m not dating Ashton Kutcher,” “I’m socially awkward,” and of course, the obligatory, “I don’t even try.” Check it out!

On what she does to get ready for public:

“How much effort do I make? Well, I had a shower… before I came here! I apologise that I didn’t bother to wash my hair. I am really, honestly, not good at sexy.”

On forgetting who she really is:

“There’s a part of me that wants to be like everybody else and just adopt a persona that I think people would like. But I am who I am. I’m too lazy to try to be something that I’m not and that’s the truth. Otherwise, I would be perfect and sweet and ladylike and all the things that I want people to perceive me as. You lose all sense of yourself in that process, though. All these actresses constantly playing the part of themselves; they end up forgetting who they really are. I didn’t realise how many people go on talk shows and act a certain way, then you meet them and you’re like ‘What?’ As though it’s two different people, day and night. Aren’t you exhausted doing that for a living?”

On being famous:

“I want someone to tell my why I should play the game. I would get where I want to be easier and faster, but I think I would lose all respect for myself and I would lose all sense of reality. What’s the point of doing that? To try and play the game makes no sense to me because I don’t even understand what the hell the game is. Why bother? Because, at the end of the day, what is it that I’m fighting for? Fame, money, recognition… these are all things that make me sick.”

On celebrity—in case that last quote wasn’t clear enough for y’all:

“I don’t need this attention to be happy. It’s actually a whole industry of rejection. People want the shiny stuff that comes with the job, but it can be rough. That’s the truth; I’m just the first to say it. It’s important that what I do and who I am are not the same thing.”

On why she never talked about Macaulay Culkin:

“Being settled so young really helped. You know, I wouldn’t take anything back in my life, not one thing. I think it all shaped me to be who I am today. There are things people know about, and there are things that the press doesn’t know about, and everything that did occur 100 percent shaped who I am. My ex-boyfriend, my family, my friends, everybody… The reason I’m able to have relationships is because I don’t talk about it.”

On Ashton Ktcher:

“We hang out. We’ve known each other for 15 years. We have mutual friends. We’re comfortable with one another. That’s it, there’s no crazy love story, nothing more. I am very private and I’ve never commented on my personal life… I really am single. I don’t go out because when I do, everybody sees me. It’s not like I’m having illicit rendezvous because there’s no such thing as secret in my life. And by the way, Justin Timberlake is one of my best friends, to this day, okay? Friends, nothing else!”

Interesting how she throws Justin Timberlake in there at the last minute, huh? Do I smell LEAKED JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE NUDES? JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE PENIS, EH?

Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis Are Still Dating if You Care

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And if the continuous stream of Mila-and-Ashton pictures haven’t convince you that there’s definitely something more than friends happening here, then I don’t know what to tell you. Maybe a full-on sex tape might convince you otherwise. I think that’s what I’m holding out for, anyway.

We recently saw Mila and Ashton on vacation together, and despite Mila’s vehement protests that the two are not totally sleeping together, they were photographed another six or eight times hanging out with friends, going to dinner, riding in cars together, and now wrapped around one another in a restaurant. But no, they’re not dating. They’re not sleeping together, and honestly, they really can’t stand one another. Isn’t that what we’re about to hear?

What I don’t understand is why the two just won’t own it. A dating-Mila admittance would do wonders for Ashton’s reputation, because almost everybody loves Mila, and it’d almost (but not really) redeem Ashton from the whole cheating-on-Demi thing, because it makes a hell of a lot more sense for Ashton to be with Mila rather than a woman twice his age with whom he has absolutely nothing in common with other than being famous.

Also, it’d be kind of nice for Mila to get her married with kids thing going. If you guys read her last interview, you know that’s all she really wants anyway:

This isn’t the right time for me to have one, but I do want a family. I’d rather be in love and have a baby than have a movie.

So does she mean “this” isn’t the right time for her because she’s dating a douchebag whose sole purpose is hot sex, or does it mean that she’s just not interested in settling down right now with anyone in particular? I don’t know. These two make me tired. Either they are or they aren’t, because it’s almost getting to the point where things are getting boring and stale now. Let’s just get things moving along here, now, OK?

Mila Kunis Evades the Ashton Kutcher Question in This Month’s Glamour

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Who knew someone who’s casually-or-not-so-casually having sex with Ashton Kutcher, extra-marital sex beast, could be so down to earth and likable? Not this girl, that’s for sure. Mila Kunis interviewed with Glamour magazine for their August ’12 issue and covered pretty much everything you could want to talk about—with the exception of obviously discussing what’s going on with Ashton Kutcher. She talked online dating, weight loss, ‘Black Swan’, and but no iron-clad confirmation of Ashton Kutcher-sex was in sight. DISAPPOINTMENT.

Here’s Mila on helping her friends find dudes on the internets:

One of my really good friends met her fiancé on an OkCupid-style website. OkCupid’s really popular—all my girlfriends have joined. I love those sites. I go on and I pick the guys for my friends. I think it’s great. It’s online shopping! We all get together with our laptops and have a glass of wine. Then we message the guy. [My approach is] just very honest and blunt. My girlfriends end up canceling half the dates anyway. Yeah. I’m really good at [editing] “About Me” [for my friends]. I feel like I could never write anything about myself, because that’s like a therapy session. But about your girlfriends? You just write what you love about your friends. If I didn’t do what I do, I would do Internet dating instead of going out to bars. In two seconds I would. It makes so much more sense.

Mila on actually considering an online profile for herself:

No. Because, ultimately, what’s going to happen? I show up to coffee.… I’m OK in my personal life. I’ve never dated. I can say this honestly: I don’t know what it’s like to date. But also, how am I going to date? I’m not in one state long enough.

On having a baby and a family:

This isn’t the right time for me to have one, but I do want a family. I’d rather be in love and have a baby than have a movie.

On evading Ashton Kutcher questions:

Ninety-nine percent of [the tabloids] is bulls–t. That is the biggest form of bullyingever, the paparazzi. Printing lies, making accusations, it’s just bullying.

On gaining 25 pounds to return to her normal weight after ‘Black Swan’:

This is my normal body. It’s not 98 pounds. God, I’m probably 25 pounds heavier in muscle mass and weight at this point. What was crazy was, when I was shooting Black Swan, everyone was like, “Gosh, you’re really too skinny.” Then my weight started bouncing back and they’re like, “She looked better when she was anorexic-looking.” You can’t please anyone! It was just for work. I didn’t do it because I had issues. Now this is my normal weight that I started out with. [I felt] Flat, flat, flat. [She gestures to her chest and hips.] There was no shape, no form, nothing, nothing.”

So come on. They’re totally doing it. All this baby-and-family business? It’s totally happening. I give it eighteen months, max, and we’re going to be hearing about Mila and Ashton settling down and having babies of their own. You mark my words.

Maxim Magazine Debuts Their Hottest Women of 2012

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There were a hundred, but we’re just going to talk about the Top 5, because that’s always the most important part of the list, when you’re “ranking” people, right? The higher echelon? Because the rest of the list wasn’t all that impressive (really, Maxim? You really felt the need to put J Woww at slot number 74, higher than Christina Hendricks and Kat Dennings? Because come on), we’re going to feature the top five, and if you really feel the compulsion to find out who the other 95 women were, you can mosey on over to Maxim‘s site and check them out there. I don’t even know who some of the women were.


#5 – Olivia Wilde
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#4 – Katy Perry
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#3 – Mila Kunis
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#2 – Olivia Munn
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#1 – Bar Refaeli
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First, who made this list? A fifteen-year-old boy? Second, is said list from 2009, because I can think of a zillion other hot chicks that should be in the Top 5 list for 2012, and not one of these ladies (hot as they are) should be in the top 5. Third? The “world’s most beautiful women”? I know lots of people go crazy for Katy Perry and her fabulous rack, but I thought “most beautiful” generally meant “faces,” and not “bodies.” I don’t know.

Who belongs? Who doesn’t? Who thinks that the staff should be flogged with a herpe-infused cat o’nine tails for even including J Woww on the damn list?

Mila Kunis Pulled A Ryan Gosling

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But in what way? Did she become amazingly gorgeous, the object of so many desires? Nope, she’s always been that. Did she start dating someone that everyone hates, both because he was a dumb person to begin with but also because he’s dating our Mila? Nope, she’s already got that one covered too. So what could she have done?

Oh, yeah, she just saved someone’s life. No big deal.

From TMZ:

Mila Kunis just pulled a Patrick Dempsey and may have saved a man’s life … TMZ has learned.

Sources tell TMZ …  a 50-year-old man — who works in Mila’s house — collapsed Saturday in her L.A. home.  He suffered a violent seizure … choking, coughing up blood and vomiting.  He had bitten through his tongue.

A person on scene tells us … Mila came running, had her friend call 911, then rushed to the man’s side.

We’re told the 28-year-old actress grabbed the man’s head … turned it to the side so he wouldn’t choke … while another person stuffed a wallet in his mouth so he wouldn’t swallow his tongue.

Law enforcement sources tell us … paramedics arrived on scene, rushed the man to the hospital, and he’s since made a full recovery. We’re told Mila volunteered to ride in the ambulance, but it wasn’t necessary.

Mila had quite the week.  The day before, her alleged stalker was taken away in cuffs after he showed up at her gym.

Have any of you guys ever saved someone’s life like this? Because I haven’t, and off the top of my head, I can’t think of anyone I know who has. Well, there was that one time that I was a camp counselor and I helped a little girl with a severe peanut allergy. I was in the pantry, and I somehow managed to knock a gigantic jar of peanut butter off the shelf, and my pants were absolutely covered in peanut butter. Like, I could scoop gobs and gobs of peanut butter off of my pants, it was gross, and that much peanut butter could have definitely hurt that poor girl if my legs got anywhere near her. My friend washed my pants while I took a shower (to get the peanut butter residue off my legs – it was so, so gross), and the girl never knew what happened. So maybe, in a small way, I pulled a Ryan Gosling too.

Do you guys have any neat stories?