Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Mariah Carey

5 Best Transformations of 2011

photo of lindsay lohan before and after drugs pics
Yesterday we did the Top 5 Douchebags of 2011, so I thought it only fair to give credit where credit is due (even if the aforementioned “credit” is only on temporary loan, like most credit is and then the person in slot #2 shoots back to complete grossness, and not just partial) and acknowledge those celebrities who have done some good for themselves, yes?

#5 – Evan Rachel Wood
photo of evan rachel wood picture photos before and after pic
Amazing what not sleeping next to Marilyn Manson can do for a girl, huh? She’s almost attractive these days, if you can forget that she posed naked and bloodied while eating cake. And participating in sodomy.

#4 – Mariah Carey
photo of mariah carey pictures before and after photo
A lot of people thought that Mariah’s figure, at almost forty-two years old, was all but gone, and after having twins, most said that was the nail in the coffin. She sure showed them, mmhmm girl.

#3 – Jennifer Hudson
photo of jennifer hudson before and after pics
Unbelievable, right? Now if she can stop losing weight for five minutes, things might continue to be OK. Girlfriend doesn’t have another ounce to lose.

Jump in to see the top 2 transformations of 2011!

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Love It or Leave It: Mariah Carey’s Confusing the Holidays Again

photo of mariah carey pictures christmas 2011 photos jedi knight coat pics
Girl, it’s not Halloween – it’s Christmas. You know, the Christmas that you and another little shithead ruined for me. Anyway, why are you dressed up like a Jedi knight? Am I going to see you whip out a silver hand? Have you gone to the dark side? Are you channeling Yoda?

All I know is that, while, yes, you look completely amazing and I’m still having a hard time remembering that you birthed two kids at once and blew up like a zeppelin in the process, the weird samurai winter coat’s gotta go.

Images courtesy of Celebuzz

Welcome to DOOM: Here’s the Video for Justin Bieber and Mariah Carey’s Christmas Collab

See, now, if I close my eyes for the first few seconds, it’s not so bad. But then I hear that awful, whiny “Baby” voice, and I’m brought back to the reality of what’s seriously going on. Also, does Mariah Carey just not dance anymore? Is her majesty above having to move on the set of a music video? She’s just content to pick up a tibia and toss it behind her every now and again, is that what this is?

Finally, the whole thing just sounds so damned auto-tuned. It’s not even real. It’s a bad dream, and I’m going to wake up any minute now.

… Any minute now, right? OK?

All The Divas Gossip About All The Divas

Did you ever want to hear the likes of Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston, Madonna, and Christina Aguilera dish about each other? Did you ever wonder if Celine Dion has a kickass Cher impression up her sleeve? Did you ever wonder if Britney Spears has had a longtime habit of referring to herself as “retarded”?

Then this video is for you, friends. Happy Saturday!

Love It or Leave It: Dem Babies’ Nursery!

A photo of Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon's baby's nursery

Is it any surprise that Mariah Carey designed this nursery? The glamour, the opulence: it really just screams Mariah, doesn’t it?

Here are all the details on Roc and Roe‘s fabulous nursery:

Now, Life & Style brings you inside Moroccan and Monroe’s (nicknamed Roc and Roe) luxurious NYC nursery filled with Roberto Cavalli designed matching outfits, plush stuffed animals and AFK cribs worth $3,594 a piece!

“I wanted to create a beautiful, tranquil, cozy environment,” Mariah tells Life & Style of their two beautiful nurseries in their Bel Air Mansion and Tribeca penthouse in NYC.

“Designing the nurseries with Gail Sedigh of AFK Furniture and Mario Buatta was so challenging because I had such specific ideas I wanted implemented,” she tells Life & Style. “I feel like I’m bringing two individuals into the world, so I wanted to do more than cookie-cutter styles in blue and pink.”

So the singer made sure to encompass everything she desired.

But no gift is greater than being a mom. “I feel so doubly blessed to have such a perfect start to our family,” Mariah gushed. “It’s perfect — it couldn’t be better.”

Personally, I’m torn between being all “Way to spend like a zillion dollars on stuff these babies will only use for a year or two” and being all “OMG where are my giant stuffed animals?! Why am I not Mariah Carey’s kid? Why is the world so unfair? YOU FAILED ME, MOM!” Where are you guys on this?

Watch This: Mariah Unveils Her Twins (No, Not THOSE Twins) on National Television

Photo: Babs, Mariah, Nick Cannon, and DEM BABIES!

At long last! Meet Moroccan and Monroe, Mariah Carey‘s babies with husband Nick Cannon. Well, OK—in the preview clip from 20/20 you really only see the backs of the babies’ heads. (But! The full interview is embedded below! BABIES!)

The happy foursome sat down with Barbara Walters to talk about love, marriage, and baby-makin’. And although it’s old news, I sincerely did not know about Mariah’s miscarriage. Ugh.

If you have time, do watch the whole interview, which first aired last night. I’d always wondered what makes this couple tick, and the way Mariah Carey is always on the verge of snapping at Nick Cannon is kind of adorable. It really is! She can’t stop messing with him, and he’s totally into it.

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Highlights:

- Mariah’s L.A. home has a huuuuge chandelier. (Lady, I’d expect nothing less.)

- The happy couple has indeed nicknamed the twins “Roc and Roe,” which is just, oh, no.

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My Christmas is ALREADY RUINED

photo of justin bieber santa claus pictures photos pics

Did you hear? Maybe, but probably not. I know a lot of you guys don’t go cray-cray over Justin Bieber, nor do you flip your shit over Mariah Carey, so you just may hear it here on Evil Beet first: Mariah Carey and Justin Bieber are – sob – teaming up to ruin one of my favorite Christmas songs, ‘All I Want for Christmas (Is You)’. I know, I know; it’s a Mariah Carey song and you probably think I should know better than that, but let’s put it into perspective: this song originally came out in 1994, when I was eleven years old. And I was a Mariah Carey fan back then, because come on. Who wasn’t? Um, hello, ‘Fantasy’? Jeepers. Anyway, even though I grew up and out of Mariah Carey, this is a song that stayed close to my heart Christmas after Christmas, and even when I hear it to this day, I’m brought back to shopping at the mall with my mom for friendship bracelets for my BFFs (with my own allowance, what what!) and hoping that my mom’d slyly try to buy something for me without my seeing (OF COURSE I’D SEE). It makes me think of Trapper Keepers ’round the holidays, Christmas breaks that seemed to go on for months, and dreaming about my crush, counting the days ’til I’d see him in Social Studies again. It makes me think of cheesy adolescents cheesily waving “See you next year!” on the last day before holiday break, handmade mittens, and the smell of turkey roasting and cookies baking.

But now? Mariah’s bringing Justin Bieber into the mix? This is probably a dream come true for today’s eleven-year-olds (who probably don’t even know who the crazy lady singing on Bieber’s new Christmas album is), but for me? My heavens.