Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Kristin Cavallari

Surprise! ‘The Hills’ Was Pretty Much Scripted!

kristin cavallari brody jenner

If you’re a big enough idiot to believe that “reality shows” like The Hills are completely unscripted and present actual events, you’re an idiot. There’s literally no other way to put it. Literally no one with a working brain thinks that what they’re watching on these shows is real life. And yet here, at the end of 2013, we have Kristin Cavallari giving us all “revelations” on what filming the show (which went off-air in 2010, by the way) was really like. Lord almighty.

Here’s what she said on Bethenny Frankel‘s (LOL) talkshow:

“I had fake relationships, fake fights. I can tell you this, I don’t care anymore at this point it’s been so many years. Brody Jenner at the time was dating Jayde Nicole.

“On the show, they had us ‘dating’ for a few episodes, they pretended like him and Jayde broke up and I was dating Brody and then Jayde and I got in a huge fight because she saw us out at the club, which wasn’t real at all. They were together the entire time.”

I only have one thing to say here, and that is: DUH.

It’s exactly like The Only Way is Essex, Made in Chelsea, the Real Housewives of Whereverthefuck, Keeping Up with the Kardashians, etc are all like. The great thing is, I’m not watching to have some grand truth revealed to me. I’m watching to be entertained, just like I watch any other openly fictional show. One in the same.

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Ladies And Gentlemen: Celebrities In Bikinis

[Image removed upon request]

Bikini season is upon us. ‘Tis the time of year where we get to see “BEST AND WORST BIKINI BODS OF 2013″ splashed all over celeb magazines, along with hints of “HERE ARE 100 PEOPLE HOTTER THAN YOU ARE, F-CK YOU!” So let’s get it over with and take the wind out of our sails with this post of celebrities in bikinis and get to the inevitable who looks fat and who doesn’t and let’s cry into our pizza. Our delicious f-cking pizza. I think all these ladies look great, although I doubt some of their bikini choices, simply because some of these are ugly.

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Kristin Cavallari is Having a Baby!

photo of kristin cavallari pregnant photo pics
Well wow. Talk about getting your way by hook or by crook.

Kristin Cavallari is expecting a baby with her on-again, off-again boyfriend/fiance, Jay Cutler, and it looks like this time the marriage might be on. If you remember, Kristin and Jay dated for awhile before getting betrothed, and when push finally came to shove, engagement rings were given and Kristin had already picked out a wedding dress (oh, and gift-hopes were already registered, too), Cutler unceremoniously dropped Kristin like a hot potato. Let’s take a trip down memory lane, shall we?:

She got dumped,” says a … source. “She’s absolutely devastated. She can’t believe this is happening.”

The couple, who were planning a spring wedding, became engaged in April [2011], when Cutler popped the question in Mexico. They had been spending much of their time recently in Chicago, and Cavallari had planned to move there during the upcoming football season.

“She was planning her dream wedding, the date was set, the location – everything was set,” the source says. “She’s in shock that the dream wedding she was planning is going to end this way.”

Just a week ago, Cavallari Tweeted about her engagement party. “Thx to all my amazing friends for making my engagement party a blast last night!” she wrote.

In a quick change, however, after appearing as a contestant on Dancing With the Stars late last year, Kristin was said to have lured Cutler back into her life, confirmed that the engagement was back on, and after what may or may not have been a clever ploy to lock Jay into her life, Kristin ended up pregnant. In a joint statement issued to People, Jay and Kristin state:

“We are thrilled to announce we are expecting our first child together. It’s an amazing time in our life and we can’t wait to meet the new addition to our growing family.”

Awesome, right? Convenient, too! I mean, I’m not saying that she did this solely to marry into the NFL family, because guys, it’s just not 1812 anymore where you have to marry the chick you knocked up. And Kristin probably knows that. But it just seems awful damned convenient that after mourning her breakup publicly for months, that the two end up reconciling and within a matter of weeks, Kristin’s pregnant. But hey, who am I to judge. You’ve got super-couples like Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis, and Seal and Heidi Klum breaking up left and right. None of us know anything about the ways of love anymore, guys, seriously.

So, congratulations are in order one way or the other, girl. Even if things don’t work out with your token football player, you still have that darling little baby to keep you company for the rest of your days on earth. As for your re-engagement announcement back in November, way to get your man. But don’t get jump the gun and too excited – you’re not down the aisle yet. I mean, look at the other NFL star that knocked up a Hollywood lady: Superbowl-bound Tom Brady. He impregnated Bridget Moynahan and before she had a spare second to enter her third trimester, he’d dropped her and started shacking up with Gisele Bundchen. And then he had a baby with her and married her.

Don’t be caught unaware, girl.