Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Kristen Wiig

Kristen Wiig Is Headed to ‘Arrested Development’, Yay!

Kristen Wiig is amazingly funny. Arrested Development is sardonic, irreverent and also hilarious. Mix the two together, and genius is sure to ensure. Execs at Netflix – who is promoting the upcoming revamp of the series online – had that very idea, and Kristen has signed on to play a young Lucille Bluth. Seth Rogen will take part in the show, as well, but no one really cares about him.

Via Vulture:

Word’s out that Kristen Wiig and Seth Rogen filmed a little somethin’ for the upcoming season of Arrested Development, premiering on Netflix in May. But who will the Bridesmaids star be playing? Stop reading now if you don’t want to be spoiled, but it’s a good one … Vulture has learned exclusively that Wiig will be playing young Lucille Bluth (Jessica Walter)! Makes sense: Wiig and Jason Bateman are presumably pals after having co-starred in the comedies Extract and Paul (in which they spent their down time inventing the rule-less game “Stop, Stop the Robber’s Coming”).

This is great news all around. No word on how many episodes she’ll appear in or how big the role will be (here’s hoping she gets at least a multi-episode arc), but I’m getting more and more excited for May – and maybe even the return of Franklin:

Quotables: Kristen Wiig Talks Bowel Movements

A photo of Kristen Wiig

“I do want to say something from the heart, something actually kind of serious and truthful. I have not pooped in four days—four days! I’ve been travelling. I’m nervous. I’m getting concerned. I’m wearing a tight dress.”

- Kristen Wiig discusses bodily functions while making a speech at Elle‘s Women in Hollywood dinner.

I’m sorry, guys. I know it’s real early, and I know not everyone loves talking about poop. But I do love hearing from Kristen Wiig, and it did make me giggle, so this is what you get.

In the comments, we can discuss such things as poop, other things the human body does regularly (does anyone else’s arm pop out of its socket regularly? Because mine does. Weird?), how awesome Kristen Wiig is, or how I just saw Whip It for the first time a few weeks ago and it made me want to try roller derby for about two minutes before I remembered that I’m a total wuss. All of these are relevant topics. Let’s get to chatting!

Who Is The Highest Paid Actress in Hollywood?

A photo of Meryl Streep

Oh, you guys, I’m sorry. When I asked the question of “who is the highest paid actress in Hollywood?” and then put a picture of Meryl Streep right up there at the top, that made it look like Meryl is the highest paid actress, didn’t it? I’m sorry, but it’s just not true. Meryl is on the list, but she’s not at the top. She deserves to be at the top, but she’s not.

Before I let you know the richiest rich lady in Hollywood, let me just show you the top ten list, all right? I’ll go ahead and tack on the amount of money they made in the past year, just so you can cry while you balance your checkbook like I do.

10. Jennifer Aniston – $11 million
9. Kristen Wiig – $12 million
8. Meryl Streep – $12 million
7. Sarah Jessica Parker – $15 million
6. Julia Roberts – $16 million
5. Charlize Theron – $18 million
4. Angelina Jolie – $20 million
3. Sandra Bullock – $25 million
2. Cameron Diaz – $34 million

Ok, but who do you think landed in the number one spot? Who do you think made nearly three times as much as the beloved Meryl Streep? Who do you think made a few million dollars more than Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Aniston combined?

A photo of Kristen Stewart

1. Kristen Stewart – $34.5 million

Yes, thanks to them Twilight movies and Snow White and the Huntsman, Kristen Stewart is the top-earning actress in all of Hollywood. Does anyone else feel physically ill?

Kristen Wiig Did the Tanning Mom Last Night on SNL

Oh man, did you guys see this last night? Because if you didn’t, you really need to watch this video.

You guys remember we talked about the Tanning Mom the other day, right? The lady that made Snooki look like a Botticelli blonde with a milky-white complexion? Also the lady who’s in trouble for making her five-year-old daughter go tanning? Well SNL spoofed Krentcil last night and mocked her prior comments of “people hate me because they’re fat and ugly,” and not, you know, because she damned near forced a near-toddler into a tiny capsule filled with ultraviolet rays of artificial sunlight in order to bronze her skin just like mommy.

Kristen Wiig, you did such a good, good job, but damn. There’s no one nasty-looking enough on that show, or even homeless on the streets of New York City that could even try to compete with Patricia Krentcil’s unique look and that lovely, lovely tan she’s rocking these days.

Which Cast Members Are Leaving Saturday Night Live?

A photo of Kristen Wiig

Ok, guys, this is not good news. You know how everyone always says that Saturday Night Live pretty much sucks these days? Well, it’s about to get a lot worse. Do you recognize that lady up there in that picture? Sure you do, that’s Kristen Wiig! She’s extraordinarily funny, and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard that she carries the whole show. If we had to pick a current star of the show, I’m sure there would be little debate that it’s this lady.

Yeah, she’s gone:

Two sources tell the new Us Weekly (on stands Friday) that several key Saturday Night Live players are following in the footsteps of SNL alums Jimmy Fallon, Tina Fey and Amy Poehler and ready to move on.

“Kristen Wiig, Andy Samberg and Jason Sudeikis are all leaving after the end of the season,” says one insider. “It will be a huge blow to the show. Without Andy’s video shorts and Kristen saving every skit, they’ll need help!”

And though a rep for Wiig, 38, and Sudeikis, 36, refutes this — telling Us, “No decisions are made until the season is over” — an insider says the timing is right, especially for the Bridesmaids star.

“Kristen was talking about leaving a while ago,” says a Wiig pal. “With her movie success, it’s no surprise.”

Meanwhile, Sudeikis has a new movie in the works, Relanxious, where he will star opposite his real-life love Olivia Wilde. In the flick (which also features SNL pal Fred Armisen) Sudeikis will play an agoraphobic looking for love.

Andy Samberg too?! The man who is partially responsible for many of my very favorite SNL skits ever? Say it ain’t so! What else, NBC? Who else could you possibly take away from us to hurt us any worse?

Oh yeah, right, there’s Jason Sudeikis too. Um, oh no! Please, don’t!

But wait, let’s think about who else we’ll still have on board. There’s Keenan Thompson and Fred Armisen, who are on their eighth and tenth seasons, respectively, and it looks as though they’re there to stay, at least for the foreseeable future. Seth Meyers is on his eleventh season, and he’s pretty good, and then there’s the fabulous Bill Hader, who has been there for seven seasons. Bill Hader could carry that show – Stefon, right? I also usually enjoy Abby Elliot and Vanessa Bayer, on their fourth and second seasons. So I guess all isn’t lost, right? There will still be some good stuff to look forward to (again, Stefon).

Besides, it’s not like Saturday Night Live will ever actually get cancelled. It won’t ever get cancelled, will it?

The Best Entertainment of the Weekend: SNL Kristen Wiig’s Lana Del Rey Impersonation

So, a lot of you guys had some pretty strong opinions on Lana Del Rey‘s Saturday Night Live performance a few weeks ago, and while I don’t think she did as poorly as some previous performers had in the past (the ones Kristen Wiig named in the above skit, and including my own personal favorite, Ashlee Simpson), her performance will definitely go down as one of the more memorable ones, and whether that’s a good thing or a bad thing is definitely subjective. Lana’s very … unique.

In the clip above, Kristen Wiig (as Lana) chats with Seth Myers about her infamous performance, and though her impersonation was spot-on and definitely poked fun at the odd singer, she made a bunch of really good points that, yeah, maybe we should be laying off Lana, her music, and her eccentric-though-maybe-staged persona because really, who’s business is it if she’s genuine or put-on or, you know, whatever?

mean, she’s already not considering doing another album and she claims it’s because she’s already said everything she’s got to say, but we all know the probable real reason why: because people are bullies, right? But again, from Lana’s point of view, who’s business is it anyway?

Oh, of course, that’s right: it’s everyone’s business.

What do you guys think about Lana Del Ray, and do Kristen’s good points masked as mockery change your opinion even a little bit if you’re one of those who do feel negatively about her?

View Results

Also, check out the clip via YouTube if you can’t view the above player.

Could Bridesmaids Win An Oscar?

Judd Apatow did an interview with Variety, and it’s basically about how hard comedies are shafted during awards seasons. He says there’s this big misconception that comedies are much easier to make than dramas or action flicks, so comedies rarely, if ever, get nominated for big awards, and I agree. I think it’s sad that well-made comedic films with great scripts and solid acting don’t get more recognition, but this year might be different. This year, Bridesmaids could win the Academy Award for Best Picture.

Bridesmaids just burst into the Top 10 list of predicted nominees for Best Picture, according to a poll of Oscarologists by Gold Derby. At this point it’s unknown how many nominees there will be, though. It will fluctuate between 5 and 10, depending on the strength of support behind the films.

The sudden awards surge for Bridesmaids is fueled by its recent performance at the Golden Globes (nominations for Best Comedy/Musical Picture and lead actress Kristen Wiig), SAG Awards (nom for supporting actress Melissa McCarthy and an unexpected bid for best ensemble) and American Film Institute (10 Best Films of 2011).

Pretty much everyone I’ve ever met, including myself, absolutely loved Bridesmaids. And hey, everyone loves Melissa McCarthy too. Those facts, along with all the award nominations should, in a perfect world, at least make for a nomination, right? Please?