Kim Kardashian isn’t expected to be a good mother by anyone’s stretch of imagination, but prepare for your percentage of faith to plummet into the triple negative digits when you realise that she’s going to be approaching motherhood using skills learned from… Kris Jenner. Momager extraordinaire Kris is the most batshit insane parent on TV and probably one of the most batshit insane off-screen, as well. Of all the adjectives to describe her parenting style, I don’t know that “good” would come in the Top 100. And yet…
Let us have it, Kimmy’s blog:
Mother’s Day is one of my favorite holidays because it’s a special day to honor my role model and best friend. As I’m counting the days until I finally get to be a mother, I’m a bit nervous and anxious but also excited knowing that I learned from the very best. My mom is a strong and ambitious career woman that despite her busy schedule and the millions of things she has going on, she still manages to put family first and continues to look out for us every day. Motherhood is a gift and I know after watching my mom do it, it’s not easy especially when trying to balance a career. I’m honored to follow in her footsteps and make her proud like I am of her.
Oh dear… Kim also says she’ll look to sister Kourtney for some help, which is, I suppose, fractionally better, but not by much. She hasn’t even given birth to this kid yet and it’s already shaping up to be a disaster. Her perfect romance with Kanye going awry? Check. Momager Kris trying to take over the whole affair? Check. Kim WANTING her to? Lord help us all.
May 16, 2013 at 9:30 am by Jennifer
Kanye West, dodger of Kim Kardashian and street signs, is concerning Kim’s family and friends by trying to spend as little time with her in Los Angeles and as much time in Paris as possible. Why is no one getting the hint?
A “close friend of the family” told Radaronline,
We just do not understand why she is traveling to Paris to see him. She is the pregnant one. Kanye will fly in to see the editors of Vogue, but he won’t fly in to see the lady carrying his child. The only way they have a future is if Kim continues to do whatever he says.
LOL at “the lady carrying his child.” Continuing on,
Some of the greatest records that have ever been recorded have been recorded in America. I am sorry that the US recording studios are not good enough for Kanye – they were good enough for Elvis, Sinatra and Michael Jackson, but not Kanye!
THIS IS A VERY COMPELLING ARGUMENT. I mean, wow! I am convinced. KANYE, GET YOUR ASS TO THE UNITED STATES IMMEDIATELY.
Another source gave us insight to Kanye’s new war against street signs, saying,
He told [Kim] that she should have guided him out of the way. He treats her like his assistant. She is putting up with it at the moment but eventually she will say enough!
LOL again, because the street sign thing reminds me of this:
She will never say “enough”. Kanye is her ticket to the A list. Not that she will ever be truly A list, but she’s now so many more levels above other reality stars. Whatever Kanye sees in her and whatever he wants to do with her and their child, she will agree to and cling onto for dear life.
Which sound a lot like this blind item from Blind Gossip…
She really, really wants you to believe that their relationship is so strong that the couple is making all their decisions together.
Ha! Not even close! He has totally gone off the reservation and is now making decisions without her… while she is scrambling to keep up and pretend that these are her decisions too!
This far-away house is not going to be her permanent residence too. Los Angeles is her home. She may travel or stay somewhere for a few months, but she will never really leave LA. Her fame is contingent upon her being followed by the paparazzi, so to think that she would seriously move to a place where they are so restricted is illogical.
It is also an incredibly clever move on his part. He will buy a house, and let her stay there occasionally so that she can pretend that she is a sophisticated, international star. But he knows that she can’t stand being out of the spotlight long, and will high-tail it back to LA every chance she gets.
On the other hand, he will stay there frequently. That way he can be far away from her… and closer to his boyfriend.
I don’t think Kanye is actually gay, but I do think it’s clear this blind item is about them.
May 15, 2013 at 3:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives
Kanye West has been remarkably restrained considering he is going to be the father of a medica circus’ future little media circus. (I’m referring to Kim Kardashian, in case you have mistakenly time travelled from the 1800′s and stopped long enough to get your gossip fix.) He’s mostly been dealing with it by living in France, where paparazzi laws are very strict. Living there allows him a little more freedom and also gets him far away from Kim Kardashian, her annoying fame hungry family and her entire reality empire.
So when he flipped out today at a paparazzo, I’m on his side. Kanye and Kim were strolling around, trying to avoid the paparazzi when he accidentally hit his head on a sign. (My favorite part is that the sign read “WRONG WAY.” So true.) It looked like it really hurt. He lashed out, blaming the photographers, shouting at them to stop taking his photo. I get that. When I stub my toe or do something like that I will shout at anyone near me and blame them. “YOU ASKED ME WHAT TIME IT WAS AND I STUBBED MY TOE, THIS IS YOUR FAULT, YOU DISTRACTED ME.” It’s stupid, but I do it. I think sometimes we all do. We’re having a rough day and we’re annoyed.
But Kanye wasn’t done. He went back and then raged at a different paparazzo. He’s really, REALLY upset. It’s hard to tell if he was violent with the video guy but he was definitely angry, using a string of curse words. It’s kind of intense.
The thing is, Kanye, you chose this life. You know Kim wants to be in public 24/7 if she could, you know she’s going to attract paparazzi, and you know she’s not going to change.
But I hope your head feels better.
Video (from TMZ), in which he completely freaks out.
May 11, 2013 at 8:30 am by Catherine St. Ives
Ah, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West – a love story for the ages! Kim’s going to be popping out Kanye’s progeny any day now, and it’s terrifying to think of these two as parents. Turns out if Kanye had his way, we wouldn’t even HAVE to think about them, because they’d be raising baby Kimye in Paris as a sophisticated French kid – something Kim is trying to put a stop to.
From Life & Style:
Life & Style can reveal that although Kim wants her kid to be born in LA, a source close to the Kardashian family dishes, “Kanye wants the baby born in Paris,” explaining, “He would love the baby to have dual citizenship.”
“Kanye is absolutely insistent that the baby will be raised in France, but Kim’s refusing to let that happen,” the insider details in the new issue of Life & Style, on newsstands now. “It’s so important for her to be near her family and have the baby grow up around its aunts, uncles and cousins. There’s no way she’ll stop fighting Kanye on this.”
Despite Kanye’s luxe Parisian penthouse the couple could be living in, the insider says of their previous agreed upon arrangement, “They were supposed to spend just three months in Paris. Now he wants to move them permanently to Paris.”
This is Life & Style we’re talking about, so chances are this story had as much thought put into it as a fart. Still, Kanye might just be that insane. Too bad we’ll never know, because Kris Jenner will NOT BE HAVING THAT.
And while Kanye is pushing for his first child to be raised abroad — reportedly a baby girl due in July — Kim has taken measures into her own hands. “Kim is against the idea and wants the baby born in LA with the family doctor who delivered Mason and Penelope,” the source tells Life & Style.
A family friend says Kim, has a strong ally on her side in momager Kris Jenner. “Kris is adamant that this happens and has already reserved the suite at Cedars and paid the deposit.”
But if Kanye knows what’s best, he’ll take this one as a loss. “Kanye isn’t happy,” the insider says. “But he doesn’t think he can win this one.”
Kanye’s ego may have the power of the Abominable Snowman, but it’s no match for the monster that is momager Kris. Doesn’t he know this by now?
May 10, 2013 at 2:30 pm by Jennifer
Kim Kardashian wore a horrendous dress to the Met Gala earlier this week. It was so bad that Robin Williams tweeted her a photo of him in a scene from Mrs. Doubtfire wearing a similar dress, with “I think I wore it better.” (Kardashian did not respond. She made sure, however, to tweet a link to a Celebuzz post celebrating her “gorgeous” dress. Guess which company manages her website?) And rumor has it that her scowling beau Kanye “I’ve Made A Huge Mistake” West didn’t approve the dress, or rather, Kim’s take on it.
Which makes it utterly hilarious that on Vogue’s website, in their slideshow of best dressed guests, Kanye West is included but Kim Kardashian is not. And not only that, but she’s actually cropped out of the photo.
So what you have is Kanye holding a disembodied hand, and Kardashian MIA in the photo and in the entire gallery. Other couples photographed together remain intact. Kardashian was the only one cropped out.
LAUGH WITH ME, AMERICA. AND WORLD. WE ARE ALL ONE TODAY.
Thanks to Fashionista for pointing this out.
May 9, 2013 at 4:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives
Anne Hathaway actually blew me away with her punk transformation for the Costume Institute Gala for the “PUNK: Chaos to Couture” exhibition at the Metropolitan Museum (or Met Gala for short). Doesn’t she look great as a blonde? Every year celebs dress to the hilt for the event for whatever the theme is. This year, it’s punk. So keep that in mind when looking at these photos — these looks are supposed to be crazy and over the top.
BEST: Anne Hathaway, January Jones, Sienna Miller
WORST: Almost everyone else, but especially Kerry Washington, Gwyneth Paltrow, and Kim Kardashian and honestly there were so many more I couldn’t even deal with.
PLEASANTLY SURPRISED BY: Miley Cyrus and Anne Hathaway
Check it out!