The 4-year-old daughter of rapper Juvenile, Jelani Deleston, was shot to death by her 17-year-old brother, who is not Juvenile’s son, on Thursday in Georgia. Also brutally murdered were her 39-year-old mother and her 11-year-old sister.
You know, normally I try to keep politics and, you know, “real” issues as far away from this blog as possible, mostly because I’m terribly ill-informed about issues involving anything and anyone who might not warrant an invite to the Teen Choice Awards, and also because I don’t really care, but, look: my gut instinct about guns has always been, like, hey, it says in our Constitution that we can have guns, so, like, I think it’s only fair that we have guns. But then I read about something like this and I’m like, “Really? Why the fuck did this kid have a gun?” and then I’m like, “Oh, yeah, ‘cuz the Constitution says we can have guns all willy-nilly over the place.” And then I’m like, “You know, maybe I should see exactly what the Constitution says.”
The Constitution says this, in the Second Amendment:
A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the People to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.
And I read that and I’m like, “You know, maybe in the modern world, this should just mean that the military can have guns, and not every dumbass in Georgia,” and then I devote like an hour of my life to reading the entire Wiki on the thing and it turns out that lots of other people — including assorted state and federal courts — think the same thing, and then — and this is the really bad part — I realize that I’m totally fascinated by all these legal discussions and decide that what I ought to do is go to law school so that in like 30 years I can write about what I think of all this in the Harvard Law Review and that’s how I know it’s time to go to bed.
If you’ve just been dying to talk about gun control laws on this blog, here’s your chance, buddy.