“There were many moments in my teenage years where I succumbed to, um, the weirdness of the group I was in. And in trying to conform—we’re marionettes!— I ended up looking like a moron.”

- Justin Timberlake mildly disses the band that is responsible for all he has today.

Whoa, Justin. Whoa. Here we go. You are tearin’ up my heart with all this. You apparently don’t understand the massive effect that NSYNC had on me and tons and tons of other people. You’re being so selfish with this kind of talk, do you realize this? I drive myself crazy when I think about how awesome NSYNC was, and I would give everything I own to be able to experience that magic again. And you have the nerve to say that you looked like a moron? You were at the height of your hotness when you had those beautiful, bouncy curls: it was clear then that God must have spent a little more time on you. But this new Justin Timberlake, the guy with no hair and a bad attitude? It makes me ill*. So I guess the game is over, JT. Good luck with Jessica Biel or whatever, but this I promise you: you just lost a fan.

*Another thing that makes me ill is the possibility that no one will understand or appreciate that all the italicized words are titles of NSYNC songs. Because they are. And they are so meaningful.

Yep, it looks like that wedding is still in the works, despite those red flags that have been popping up for the past three years or so. I will never understand why Jessica Biel is actually going to marry Justin Timberlake, or why he agreed, or basically anything at all involving these two together. That’s fine though, I don’t have to understand it. But I bet Jessica’s mom and dad would like to feel good about it before their daughter goes and marries good ol’ JT.

From The National Enquirer via Celebitchy:

Jessica Biel’s engagement to Justin Timberlake is being rocked by her family’s distrust of him! Tensions in the Biel family have reached fever pitch with Jessica’s devoted dad remaining suspicious of Timberlake’s intentions, sources say. And Justin’s reached the end of his rope.

“Justin has tried everything to win over Jessica’s family – gifts, wining and dining her parents, attending key family events, and even giving her brother Justin a job, only to have it thrown back in his face,” revealed a friend of Justin. “He finally got frustrated and blew up at Jessica. She begged him to have patience and assured him that she loves him and has faith in him.”

But it’s easy to see why her parents would feel otherwise.

“Jessica dad and her mom Kim will never forget the hurt Justin caused their daughter when they split early last year,” said a source close to the Biel family. “They’d been together for four years and she put up with so much, including his on-set affair with Mila Kunis and him hooking up with Olivia Munn shortly before they split.”

Justin has also been linked to Olivia Wilde and Ashley Olsen, and Jessica constantly fins phone numbers from girls in his pockets, added the source. Even after they got engaged in December, Justin reverted to his bad-boy ways.

“Jessica started to complain that she hardly ever saw him… in February, Jessica actually begged Justin to teach her how to sing – not because she wanted to try musical theater, which is what she told him, but because she wanted to spend quality time with him!”

Still, her parents remain worried that he’ll cheat on her again, according to the source.

“Justin refuses to sell his bachelor pad on Mulholland Drive, and that’s left a foul taste in her dad’s mouth,” explained the source. “Justin insists he wants to keep his boys-only parties away from Jessica’s house, where he normally stays. But even when Jessica offered to build him a ‘man cave’ on her property for him, he refused to sell. As far as her parents are concerned, these are not the actions of a man who’s serious about settling down – and no amount of cash-flashing will convince them otherwise.”

So she finds numbers in his pockets frequently, he refuses to sell his house so he can have “boys only parties” and her parents don’t like him? Gee, sounds like a catch, Jess. You must be super proud.

Yeah, so I guess this is seriously happening, huh? It took enough to make me believe it: I was skeptical when I heard the engagement rumors, and I didn’t really believe that whole thing about Justin’s grandma running her mouth, I thought the first sighting of Jessica’s engagement ring was ridiculous, and I rolled my eyes all over the place when I was telling you guys about their plans for the wedding. I never truly believed that Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel were getting married until I saw the photos of the actual ring. Even then though, I still thought there was something sort of fishy about the whole thing.

But here we are. It looks like this thing is going on full steam ahead without my understanding, so I’m just going to hop on board and share the news with you, all right?

From People:

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel have kept a low profile about their engagement, but the couple are pulling out all the stops for their big day, a source tells PEOPLE.

“Justin and Jessica are planning a big [summer] wedding,” a source close to the pair tells PEOPLE. “Jessica initially wanted a smaller, more intimate wedding, but Justin from the beginning wanted a big wedding and that’s what they have decided on.”

According to the source, Timberlake, 31, and Biel, 30 – who’ve recently been spending time together in Atlanta where he’s shooting Trouble with the Curve – have decided they want to “include all their friends” in the celebration, says the source.

Biel, who was seen sporting her engagement ring last month, has yet to decide on her dress, the source notes, but the actress is “very involved” in planning the ceremony.

As for the groom, the source says: “Justin has promised her the best day ever.”

Wow, I would have thought that that would be backwards, that Justin would have wanted the smaller wedding while Jessica insisted on the larger one. Wouldn’t that make a little more sense? Not that anything truly makes sense in this wacky, wacky world at all though. I mean, come on, this couple is actually getting married. What crazy surprise do you have in store for us next, universe?

It’s finally here! Were you, like, waiting for it, or were you like me and just kind of apathetic and mildly unbelieving about the entire thing? Because when I saw this photo today, I was kind of surprised. I was starting to think that the whole ‘Jess wore the ring to an SNL afterparty’ thing was, frankly, a big ol’ lie designed to steer other women away from Justin while Jess continuously tried to work her feminine wiles and drop bomb-sized hints about what kind of setting she preferred and with what clarity diamond. You know.

However, my instinct was wrong, and the fabled ring happens to be real – unless Jess is just trying to stir up more mass delusions of grandeur by sporting a pretty large-assed cocktail ring. Sources say this is the skinny on the big, fat diamond:

She [Jess] finally flashed the custom-designed display while strolling around Los Angeles with her fiancé yesterday afternoon while leaving the Tavern. And the paparazzi was apparently in for a real treat of a photo op—the usually PDA-shy couple also didn’t try to hide their affection for each other.

As for the rock, no details have been released (nor are there likely to be any) though the humongous square-cut diamond bling pretty much speaks for itself.

I’d say.

Jump in to check out the humongous ring that Justin -finally- put on it.

(more…)

Does anyone else think this whole thing where Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are supposed to be engaged is a little weird? I know that Justin’s grandma apparently confirmed it, and Jessica supposedly wore her engagement ring to a Saturday Night Live after party last weekend, but … I don’t know. It’s been about two months since Justin is said to have proposed, don’t you think we would have seen a ring by now? Wouldn’t we have heard anything at all about it, besides from Granny Timberlake?

Oh well, none of that speculation really matters, because Justin and Jessica are having a summer wedding!

From Us Weekly:

Don’t count on a long engagement for Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel.

After nearly five on-and-off (and sometimes rocky!) years together, the recently engaged twosome plan to tie the knot later this year, an insider tells Us Weekly.

“The big day’s this summer at a private estate,” an insider says of Timberlake, 31, who proposed to the actress, 31, in late December.

What will the stunning bride wear to become Mrs. Timberlake? “Monique Lhuillier is her No. 1 choice for the dress,” the source reveals of the beloved designer, whose dresses have been worn by such A-list brides as Reese Witherspoon, Jessica Alba, Vanessa Minnillo and Shannen Doherty.

In keeping with the couple’s uber-private M.O., it took Biel about six weeks to debut her engagement ring; she finally sported the rock (showing it off to Amy Poehler and Kristen Wiig!) at a Saturday Night Live afterparty at NYC’s Ristorante Asellina Feb. 18. “It wasn’t huge,” a witness says. “It looked vintage and might have been custom made.”

Yeah, we’ll see.

If these two actually do end up getting married, then I guess I’ll eat my hat or whatever, because I really, really don’t see it happening. Why would Justin even propose? Did Jess blackmail him, or did she just finally wear him down enough to get what she wanted? I think either one of those is totally believable.

But hey, can we just talk real quick about how the Us Weekly article called Vanessa Minnillo and Shannen Doherty “A-list brides”? Because I LOLed harder at that than anything else. I had to use a Google to learn one thing that Vanessa Minnillo has done besides marry Nick Lachey, and the last time I saw Shannen Doherty was on this commercial for some online college or something. I don’t really remember, which just proves my point that no, Us Weekly, you are wrong about the lists.

Anyway, how do you guys feel about this here wedding? Any chances of it coming to pass?

From Us Magazine:

To celebrate his guest appearance on Saturday Night Live in NYC Saturday, Justin Timberlake hit up the show’s weekly after party at Asellina in Gansevoort Park Hotel. On his arm was his fiancee Jessica Biel, who, sources tell Us Weekly, was happily flaunting her engagement bling!

“Jessica was showing off her ring,” the source tells Us. Biel, 29, has yet to debut her new bling in public since Timberlake, 31, popped the question over the holidays in Jackson, Wyoming. The pair have been dating on and off for four and a half years.

“They were very lovey. Holding hands,” another source tells Us of Biel and Timberlake’s PDA at the soiree. “They kissed a few times in front of the crew.”

“They” kissed a few times in front of the crew, or Biel mauled him for publicity reasons like that one time she assaulted him at his birthday party, calling him the “love of her life,” and “wonderful man” and all of that other business? Because something must have clicked in Justin‘s head (or in his neck or knuckles or something, under the tight unrelenting clutch grasp of Jess’s love) in order to get him to propose.

Don’t get me wrong. I think it’s awfully – I don’t know, is “feminist” the word I’m looking for to describe the lengths that Jess has gone to get her man? – sweet, I guess, that Jess is so intent on settling with Justin and popping out kiddos and happily riding the coattails of his fame (and maybe even turning her head to his indiscretions), but then again, I’m not so sure. Is it sad? Should she have given up when he publicly preferred his fame and his freedom both months and years ago? Maybe. Maybe that’s what I would have done. But hey – who’s really to say?

Can you totally not wait to actually see the ring?!