Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Jason Alexander

Remember When Jason Alexander Was A Serious Actor?

A photo of Jason Alexander

I’m not saying that Jason Alexander was ever in the running for an Oscar or anything – though he was nominated for a number of Emmys and Golden Globes, and he did win a few Screen Actors Guild awards – but he did good stuff. There was Seinfeld, of course, which he was amazing on. He hit Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, too. He’s been in a number of movies and television shows since then, but here recently, his career has been slowing down a bit. I mean, in the past couple of years he’s done ads for Jenny Craig and a Funny or Die video with Courtney Stodden, you know? I’m sorry to say this, but it looks like Jason Alexander’s star has been fading for a little while now.

But not like this. I never ever, not in a million years, would have guessed that something like this could happen. Something so horrible, so unspeakably awful, something so tragic and terrible that I can barely even stand to look at it.

Jason Alexander just starred in a music video for Nickelback.

I just … Nickelback. Honestly.

Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchison Do Funny or Die

And I am loving it, you guys, I am absolutely loving it. Well, except all that makeup on Courtney‘s boobs, that’s a little distracting. And I’m not making that up, right? She does use makeup to make her implants look bigger, doesn’t she? But anyway, I’m loving this video so much because it almost, almost distracts me from the fact that this is a married couple consisting of a 51-year-old man and a 17-year-old girl.

I was seriously watching this video, giggling every now and then because I enjoy Jason Alexander so, and it made me like Courtney a little because this made it seem like she was in on the joke. It made it seem like she was aware of how ridiculous she always looks, and even that she aimed to be that ridiculous. I actually thought “way to go, Hutchisons! Live your life and don’t worry about all those haters!” But then I remembered that the haters existed because these two are married in real life, and that’s disturbing.

Speaking of things that are disturbing, E! asked Courtney’s mom if she thought the Funny or Die clip went too far:

“They were not at all offended,” she told E! News. “Courtney is so funny, and with her sense of humor, and Doug’s too, they are able to be confident in who they are as people. They can take something and like it and laugh and be OK with it. They were the first ones to think it’s a funny thing.

“If someone spends the day with Courtney and Doug, they would win them over. They’re able to rise above everything. With Courtney, it flows off her back like water off a duck’s back. She’s so secure, she can take anything and look at the funny side. Criticism does not get her down at all.”

And, yet again, I am completely disgusted but completely unable to look away. Curse you, Hutchisons, and the spell you have cast on me!