How would I describe Harry Styles‘ fashion sense? Well, it’s like he pulled a few items out of Burt Reynolds’ hamper in the dark and threw it on himself, throwing in a scarf he found hanging off a car’s muffler for completion. But apparently, that’s style! Harry… Style(s). Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.
That’s right, Harry Styles picked up a trophy at the British Fashion Awards ceremony held in London on Tuesday night. He was given the British Style Award, which was voted by the public and hilarious (but totally not worth mentioning) sponsored by Vodafone. That outfit above is Hedi Slimane, which is code for “really fucking expensive” but still ugly, so take that as you will. Either way, he beat Kate Middleton, Cara Delevingne and David Beckham for the honour. Never underestimate the power of screaming teenage girls to sabotage anything vote-based.
If we’re giving awards for ugly clothes, by the way, honourable mention goes to Rita Ora, who turned up looking like Jessica Rabbit put through the black & white filter on Photoshop.
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Kendall Jenner and Harry Styles were photographed out and about together last week, immediately setting off rumours that they’re romantically involved. If that’s supposed to mean they’re in a relationship, I doubt that’s the case, but there’s a 99.999% chance they’re at the very least fucking, though both are playing coy about it right now.
Harry was questioned about Kendall by Piers Morgan (ew, go away) and here’s what he had to say about it (via DS):
“I mean, we went out for dinner, but no, I guess,” Styles replied when asked if he was dating Jenner.
Morgan continued to press Styles on the issue, asking if the singer could see a romantic future with Jenner.
“Dunno,” Styles answered, before insisting: “Yeah, let’s move on, shall we?”
Right, so… you’re sleeping with her but maybe you told her that you might see where things go/she could call you her boyfriend or something even though you didn’t mean it. Or maybe it started off as sex between two hideously rich people and now you catch yourself having something resembling real human feelings.
As for Kendall, here’s what she told E! News:
“I haven’t met them all. But the few I’ve met are amazing. They’re really, really nice guys.”
That’s right, Kendall. Play it cool, play it cool. Harry Styles is one of the biggest stars in the most famous boy bands in the world and he has all those totally awesome tattoos. Wouldn’t want to mess that up, would we?
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One would assume that, given access to a fair bit of money, you would probably choose to work with the very best tattoo artists on any body art you had done to create elaborate, impressive pieces, right? That’s a fair assumption? Well then what the fuck is wrong with people like Justin Bieber and in this case, Harry Styles, who continue to get tattoos that look like they were done by a life sentence prisoner with an old Bic hooked up to a battery?
Harry Styles got a new skull tattoo on his “bicep” (if you could call it that – the arm looks like it belongs to a 6-year-old) that is just hideous, like the rest of his work. I don’t expect men to get bright, colourful artwork across their body, but this is just taking the piss. I’m not sure what the story behind it is (if there even is one) or if Harry just thought it looked “bad ass” or something, but it needs to go, far far away.
I don’t think anyone really looks to Harry Styles from One Direction for thoughts on anything besides, maybe, Taylor Swift songs or his love of cougars. He’s pretty harmless, but there’s not much going on behind appearances, I don’t think. In any case, Harry has now shared his thoughts on, what else, TWERKING. Oh, brother.
“I think it’s quite inappropriate,” Styles told Moviefone. “Especially for the age groups that it’s aimed at.”
When we followed up on that question by asking the guys if they’re concerned about the sometimes very young age of their fans, Styles chimed in again. “When they’re twerking, yes,” he added. “I think it’s, you know, promoting promiscuity.”
I don’t think “promiscuity” is what you need to be worrying about with twerking. How about the fact that a bunch of white girls think it’s funny to pretend they’re black and “ghetto” by doing it without realising how fucking ignorant they are? I dunno, that’s slightly more concerning to me.
Also LOL on Harry Styles talking about promiscuity considering he was having sex with every woman going when he was still a young teen. Ugh, these kids.
Taylor Swift has never been shy about revealing the details of her relationships in her songs, and Harry Styles has basically admitted that he knew that all along and is all ears for her songs about their short-lived relationship because he’s sure she’ll be writing them. She already sorta maybe wrote ‘I Knew You Were Trouble’ about him (despite the fact that I imagine that song was written before they’d even met), and they weren’t even together all that long, so is there anything left to tell? Eh, who knows.
From US Weekly:
“It would be hypocritical for me to say she couldn’t do it because everybody writes songs based on personal experience,” the 19-year-old singer tells Us. “I can’t say I’d have dated someone less famous to avoid it.” The British heartthrob split from the “I Knew You Were Trouble” singer-songwriter in early January after a few months of dating.
Denying that he’s nervous about getting the John Mayer treatment (Swift slammed the musician in the song “Dear John” off her third studio album Speak Now in 2010) the “What Makes You Beautiful” singer jokes, “at least she’s a great songwriter!”
Well, at least he has a good sense of humour about it, or whatever? Hollywood is just so incestuous, man. Think about the fact that Taylor Swift was involved with John Mayer, who is now dating her good friend, Katy Perry. That’s just the tip of the iceberg, but it kinda makes me want to gag.
In between sexting with Ke$ha and singing some awful (but awfully catchy) songs for screaming throngs of pre-teens, there’s one thing Harry Styles likes to do, and it’s cleaning. He’s so into cleaning, in fact, that he’s starting to drive some of his One Direction bandmates a little insane.
From The Daily Star:
Hazza, 19, is so obsessed with keeping their 30-foot tour bus clean he makes his pals wear slippers so they don’t dirty the floor.
A crew member told us: “Harry loves everything to be neat and tidy. He’s fixated with keeping the tour bus clean.
“He watches to make sure no-one drops food anywhere and asked people to leave their shoes at the door and wear slippers.
“He went to a supermarket and bought a ton of cleaning products as he didn’t think the bus was clean enough.
“Everyone has their own quirky habits, but we all call him Mrs Mop.”
I don’t see how wanting to be clean is a “quirk”. I mean, I used to be messy as hell until I grew up and realised how disgusting and lazy it is not to clean up after yourself and keep your living space tidy. Now I live with a roommate who will cook three meals a day and pile the dishes up for at least two days before she thinks about washing them. NOT COOL, people. Not cool.
You go, Mrs Mop.
We all know Harry Styles likes a woman who will put out, so he’s started texting with ghost lover and Johnny Depp eye f-cker Ke$ha – though hold your horses, cos there’s no sexy times just yet.
From E! Online:
“We’ve texted here and there,” Ke$ha exclusively revealed to me yesterday at the MTV Movie Awards. “No sexting—not yet. Maybe he can be my cougar bait.”
At 26, Ke$ha is seven years older than Styles. As 1D fans know, Styles certainly likes the older ladies.
“It could be really fun,” Ke$ha said.
Uh… how about no? I don’t think Harry has particularly discerning tastes or whatever (nor does she), but for some reason I cannot see this one happening. I think Harry would get freaked out by how absolutely f-cking mental Ke$ha is, and she’d probably not be too keen on all the STDs he’s got. ZING! I kid (or do I?) – either way, something tells me he didn’t respond to her last text after reading this.