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Gwyneth Paltrow

0Chris Martin wishes he could give you a Gwyneth Paltrow scandal, but he can’t

gwyneth paltrow chris martin

Gwyenth Paltrow and Chris Martin announced their “conscious uncoupling” earlier this year, but there have been a million and one rumours about the possibility of them getting back together. They’re constantly hanging out together – more than any separated people usually do, even with kids in the picture – but don’t get ahead of yourself, because they’re not reuniting, they just really care about each other. BORING.

From 104.3′s Valentine in the Morning (via US Weekly):

“The truth is — well, I don’t really love talking about this stuff. But the thing we told everyone at the beginning of the year is true,” the 37-year-old said. “We are very close, we are not together. But, we’re…you know…that’s the truth… and uh, that’s it.”

“You know, there’s a lot of love,” he continued. “So there’s nothing — there’s no scandal I’m afraid. I wish i could give you scandal.”

Chris has always come off as a really decent guy, so I’m not surprised that he’s handled this entire thing in such a quiet and dignified way. It’s also really great for their kids that this whole thing has gone so smoothly. The last thing kids need is messy ass parents – especially famous ones – ruining their lives with unnecessary drama.

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July 26, 2014 at 1:00 pm by Jennifer

1Chris Martin eats meat now that he’s single

Coldplay leave the Hyatt Regency Cologne Hotel

While married to Gwyneth Paltrow – or rather, while consciously coupled with her, I suppose, since they’re not actually divorced – Chris Martin followed a strict vegetarian diet. One would think that a grown man could choose which foods he eats, but Goop runs a tight ship and is not into animal products, apparently.

Well, worry no more – Chris changed his diet for “various reasons” and enjoys a bit of fish and whatnot now that he’s on his own… and he won’t apologize for it!

From BBC Radio 2 (via Radar Online):

“I felt like you should only eat something that you would be able to kill,” the Coldplay singer explained to BBC Radio 2. “I don’t know why on earth we’re talking about this. I have got to stop talking or there’ll be some sort of headline. Could you kill a fish? I wouldn’t like it but I probably could, so I’ll eat a fish . . . or a giraffe.”

“My daughter has been a vegetarian since she was born,” he revealed. “So, I keep getting tempted to go back, but I don’t eat very much meat.”

I’m a bit of a free spirit and think people should eat whatever they want (and not eat whatever they don’t). It’s all good – the world is a big place, food is plentiful in most places and we’re spoiled for choice, especially in the Western world. Live it up! However, I am a staunch omnivore and haaaaate preachy vegetarians/vegans. Like, chill with your soy and tofu and enjoy it, but I’mma have this steak and you can shut up if you don’t like it.

Also, way to make a child vegetarian because that’s YOUR preference. That’s one of the shittiest things you can do as a parent, I think. No wonder her kids always look so malnourished. And no, I’m not saying you can’t be healthy when you’re a vegetarian or vegan, but children need certain nutrients, sorry.

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July 4, 2014 at 9:00 am by Jennifer

2Gwyneth Paltrow goes Madonna, Audrey Hepburn for Max Factor campaign

gwyneth paltrow madonna max factor

Gwyneth Paltrow is a hot ass mess, and something she just cannot do – besides get the stick out of her ass – is “let loose”. I literally cannot imagine the woman not in pressed linen pants or, say, eating a large pepperoni pizza in pyjamas that are stained sort of a weird purple colour because she accidentally put them in the wash with the darker stuff. She’s just not capable of it, and that’s why her new Max Factor campaign is a massive fail.

For the ads, which are part of Max Factor’s 100 years of Glamour anniversary/Modern Icon campaign, Goopy dresses up like four beauty icons: Madonna, Farrah Fawcett, Audrey Hepburn and Brigitte Bardot. She carries off exactly none of them.

gwyneth paltrow brigitte bardot max factor

See what I mean? I know that Max Factor as a brand wants to convey a certain level of glamour and seriousness – especially since they aren’t exactly marketing to the teen crowd – but like… why? Why Gwyneth Paltrow as the face of your brand at all, really? I would lay $100 bet on the fact that she’s never touched an item of their makeup (other than, say, for photoshoots) and would turn her nose up at drugstore beauty purchases. After all, they’re not organic and don’t contain ingredients that were milked from the teats of forest squirrels or whatever she’s into. It’s just not believable.

gwyneth paltrow audrey hepburn max factor

What do you think?

gwyneth paltrow farrah fawcett max factor

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July 2, 2014 at 11:00 am by Jennifer

0Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin are about to consciously re-couple

gwyneth paltrow chris martin

Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin decided to “consciously uncouple” from their nearly decade-long marriage just a few short months ago, and while there were rumours of cheating on both sides, the pair have remained pretty close. So close, in fact, that it seems like they may just give their relationship another shot.

From Radar Online:

“Chris still lives with her, they are amazingly lovey-dovey together and she still wears her wedding ring,” a source tells the paper of the pair, who share a $14 million Malibu mansion.  “They may have consciously uncoupled a few months ago – but they seem to be recoupling now. No one will be surprised if they get back together.”

Friends say the break-up actually allowed the pair to breathe a little, and enjoy each other’s company without expectations.

“It’s true they had problems but in the weirdest way this ‘conscious uncoupling’ situation has relieved the pressure on them,” explains the insider.

Well, that’s that, I suppose. Given the sound of Coldplay‘s new album, Chris was having some major emo drama over their split, so it’s not really all that surprising. That, combined with Gwyneth’s terror over tarnishing her pristine (as she sees it) reputation, means this is a reunion that’s most likely on.

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June 16, 2014 at 9:00 am by Jennifer

1Gwyneth Paltrow thinks internet comments are like being in a real life war

gwyneth paltrow recode

Gwyneth Paltrow is not the sharpest tool in the shed, nor does she have much of a connection to reality as the rest of us know it. It’s hilarious, really – or rather, you have to laugh to keep from crying because it’s so insane that a woman who sees herself as so enlightened can walk around living in such ignorance. Her latest foray into the land of “HUH?” is the fact that she compared people making mean comments about her on the internet to… being in a real live war where you can be killed and your entire life can be destroyed, as well as the lives of those you love. LOL, okay, let’s go with this then.

From TMZ:

Shortly before her appearance at the Code tech conference this week, Paltrow said, “You come across [comments] about yourself and about your friends, and it’s a very dehumanizing thing. It’s almost like how, in war, you go through this bloody, dehumanizing thing, and then something is defined out of it.”

Paltrow — whose most recent life struggle was probably a scuffed nail — added, “My hope is, as we get out of it, we’ll reach the next level of conscience.”

Paltrow added, “It’s taken me a long time to get to the point where I can see these things and not take it as a personal affront and a hurt. I see myself as a chalkboard or a whiteboard or a screen, and someone is just putting up their own projection on it.”

Of course, actual veterans aren’t really pleased with this whole comparison, and she’s managed to piss off/alienate a whole lot of people yet again with her bullshit.

Cindy McCain — the wife of John McCain (an actual veteran) — has already torn Paltrow to shreds on Twitter, writing, “Gweneth Paltrow [sic] is a joke … Perhaps Gweneth Paltrow should go out on patrol with some soldiers. Kind of like a Red Carpet in her mind I guess!”

And other veterans agree — a rep for Veterans for Peace tells TMZ, “She doesn’t understand what it means to be in real danger … Not someone talking to you on the Internet, but actually having bullets shot at you.”

The rep adds, “I’ve gone to war and had that kind of fear. She’s not in a situation where she can compare the two. She hasn’t had to fear for her life and not know whether she’d make it home.”

I really fear for this woman’s children and can only hope they get out early enough not to be eternally damaged by their mother’s idiocy. It’s sort of sad that she’s been through so little in her life that people saying what an idiot she is online has caused her severe stress in life. If that’s the worst of her problems, I’d say she’s pretty damn lucky, wouldn’t you?

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May 30, 2014 at 7:00 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Gwyneth Paltrow

0Is Gwyneth Paltrow trying to steal Kate Mara’s boyfriend?

gwyneth paltrow

Oh shit, cougar on the prowl! Gwyneth Paltrow is now “consciously uncoupled” from Chris Martin, which means she’s looking for a new man and has apparently set her sights on Kate Mara‘s longtime boyfriend, 28-year-old Max Minghella.

From Radar Online:

After her split from husband Chris Martin, the Goop goddess, 41, has reconnected with an old friend, The Social Network star Max Minghella, 28, a source revealed.

But Minghella, who has dated House of Cards beauty Kate Mara, 31, on and off for four years, is still firmly on Mara’s arms.

Now-unattached mom-of-two Paltrow, however, “jokes that she wants to adopt Max,” the source added.

Minghella, who, like Martin, is British, is the son of Paltrow’s late friend Anthony Minghella, who directed her in The Talented Mr. Ripley.

Lately, Paltrow “has allowed Max to use her ritzy Los Angeles house when she’s not staying there, as he usually lives modestly in Hollywood.”

Well, that sounds… weird. Does Max not have a house in LA? Would he not stay with Kate Mara? It’s all bizarre, but I doubt this will turn into anything. Gwyneth needs to chillax a bit, though. Call that dude you were kissing at that baseball game, girl!

This is Max, by the way:

max minghella

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May 12, 2014 at 12:00 pm by Jennifer
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