Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Farrah Fawcett

Eek! It’s the New Farrah Fawcett Barbie!

Photos of Farrah Fawcett and her Barbie doppelgaenger

Images via the Daily Mail

Readers! You strike me as the type of grown adult women (and men?) who collect dolls. Did I guess right? No?

Anyway, that’s why I’m coming to you for advice. I, too, am the sort who shells out for limited-edition dolls—it’s kind of a celeb idolatry thing, kind of a simulacrum thing, but mostly a leftover from my action-figure-collecting days—but I have to admit, I’m just not sure about this one.

You see, the new-ish Farrah Fawcett Barbie is flying off the shelves. But I kind of have to side with CNN on this—the doll is a teensy bit creepy. But why is it creepy? Is it because of the dead-on likeness (absent her two most salient features)? We’d all like to remember Farrah at her 1976 best, but do we really want her plasticized?

But most importantly, how will Farrah Barbie look next to my Cyndi Lauper Barbie? It’ll look weird, right? Ugh, that’s what I thought.

Tori Spelling is Skinny, Paranoid, and Now Communicating With the Dead

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Right from the horse’s mouth (no [laughs] pun intended), Tori Spelling confirms that she’s nuttier than squirrel poo.

Spelling states that she recently visited with famed dead-person contacter John Edward to see if there was a way for her to contact her deceased father, Aaron Spelling. However, instead of meeting up with good old dad, Tori claims that another person “came through” instead: Farrah Fawcett, who, if you remember, died on Michael Jackson’s death day almost a year ago (um, and can you believe it’s almost been a year?).

Tori states that Fawcett left various messages for Spelling to carry back to her family (namely, Ryan O’Neal) and advised her to let them know that she was “happy” and “at peace.”

According to Spelling:

“She wanted me to give a message to her family about how she was doing and what was going on and I’m like, ‘Great! She really picked the wrong person,’” Tori laughed. “Non-confrontational me, what am I gonna do?” Tori continued. “So I’m sitting on that information — I’m happy to say it’s not in the book because it happened afterwards.”

Though Tori claims that she’s non-confrontational — and really, who the hell are we talking about, here, non-confrontational Donna Martin, or mama-fighting Tori Spelling? — she obliged Farrah’s request and took a letter to the dead star’s family:

“I actually wrote a letter to Ryan O’Neal and gave it to him so I was like, he’s either going to think I’m completely crazy or he’s going to say, ‘Wow! Some of this makes sense,’ because she gave very specific details of things to tell them,” she explained. “I did and I included that in the note to Ryan saying, ‘Please pass this on to Redmond… She really wanted him to know these things,’” Tori explained. “I haven’t heard from Ryan so I don’t know, you know, I’m hoping you know he understood what I was trying to say and doesn’t think I’m some loony.”

Oh, damn, that’s rich. Ryan O’Neal thinking that Tori Spelling’s a loony. Not only is that the pot calling the kettle black, but it’s almost too bizarre a concept to even wrap your brain around. That’s like those patients in high-security penitentiaries thinking that they’re pure sanity and everyone else around them is crazy.

Oh, and on that note? Shutter Island? It sucked.

Farrah Fawcett and Ryan O’Neal’s Son Arrested On Drug Charges Again

Remember that pretty face? The son of Farrah Fawcett and Ryan O’Neal, Redmond O’Neal? Well, I guess being behind bars while his mother died wasn’t enough to shake him straight, because he’s been arrested yet again on drug charges. Worst part? He left court ordered rehab to go score. You know that’s going to buy him some more time in lockdown.

From People:

The troubled son of the late Farrah Fawcett and Ryan O’Neal was busted on a drug violation on Dec. 29, a Los Angeles DA spokeswoman said Tuesday. He had been undergoing in-patient rehab since September.

At a hearing Tuesday, Judge Michael Tynan ordered Redmond, 24, into a 30-day jail rehab facility pending a Feb. 2 sentencing hearing for violating probation.

“It seems to me you haven’t got a clue as to what recovery means,” Judge Tynan lectured Redmond, who was nervously shaking his leg while wearing a blue L.A. County jail jumpsuit. “It’s a lifetime commitment. It’s grinding, hard, painful work.”

Is anyone else really sick and tired of seeing rich kids screw up on their parents dime? Sure, he’s paying the consequences, but he’s not learning any lessons and that’s why he keeps winding back up in jail. If anything, he’s just costing tax payers money at this point and it’s a real shame because if anyone could afford to go to rehab, it’s a celebrity’s kid. I have a feeling that Redmond is either going to straighten out on his own and go Born Again on us or he’ll just die. The courts aren’t getting through to this kid, so I’m thinking those are the only options, unfortunately.

Farrah Fawcett Leaves Ex-Boyfriend $100K, Leaves Ryan O’Neal Zip

Farrah Fawcett and Ryan O’Neal were together for almost thirty years.  There were a few years in the middle there where they split and dated other people, though I suspect Ryan kinda always dated other people.  They came back together near the end of Farrah’s life and O’Neal certainly positioned himself as her primary caretaker.  In the last few days before the actress died, Ryan even said that they were to marry, even if he had to move Farrah’s lips for her.  Romantic or hoping to stake a claim to her money?  It doesn’t matter.  She died, he tried to score with his daughter at FF’s funeral and now he’s been frozen out of her will.

Here’s the news though:  Last spring, a guy named Greg Lott was giving interviews in which he claimed to be Farrah’s secret boyfriend.  They dated in college, then he did two stints in the clink for drug trafficking.  According to Lott, they reunited eleven years ago and remained together until the final months leading up to Farrah’s death when Ryan took over and cut off contact between the two.

Hey, Lott may be a scumbag considering the fact that he shared all the details of his relationship as well as copies of personal letters with Daily Mail, but one thing remains.  Farrah didn’t leave Ryan a penny, but did leave this (according to O’Neal’s definition) “disgruntled ex-boyfriend” $100K.  I just love this message that Farrah was able to leave behind.  Ryan:  zero.  Secret lover:  a hundred thousand bucks.

Ryan O’Neal Looks For Action at Farrah’s Funeral — Propositions Tatum

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I’ve always suspected that Ryan O’Neal is a sleazeball.  When he announced that he was going to marry Farrah (while she was on her deathbed) even if he had to move her lips for her during the vow exchange, it just confirmed my suspicions.  Not that I needed any further convincing, Vanity Fair’s Leslie Bennetts sat down with Ryan O’Neal and you won’t believe the things he shared.  

O’Neal tells Bennetts that he didn’t recognize his daughter, Tatum, at Fawcett’s funeral. “I had just put the casket in the hearse and was watching it drive away,” he says, “when a beautiful blonde woman comes up and embraces me. I said to her, ‘You have a drink on you? You have a car?’ She said, ‘Daddy, it’s me–Tatum!’ I was just trying to be funny with a strange Swedish woman, and it’s my daughter. It’s so sick.”

When Bennetts asks Tatum about the exchange, she replies, “That’s our relationship in a nutshell…. You make of it what you will.” She sighed. “It had been a few years since we’d seen each other, and he was always a ladies’ man, a bon vivant.”

Oh, Ryan!  Do try and keep in in your pants around your daughter!  He went on to talk about his regrets of having children.

O’Neal is brutal on the subject of his parenting and his children, telling Bennetts, “I’m a hopeless father. I don’t know why. I don’t think I was supposed to be a father. Just look around at my work–they’re either in jail or they should be.” He doesn’t talk to any of his kids except for Redmond, whom he visits in jail. “I was in touch with them for years, and I was a mess,” he says of the others. “I’m not in touch with them now, and I’ve never been happier.” When asked if he’s sorry he had children, he nods, Bennetts reports. “A couple of them I would take back,” he says.

It seems that the feeling is mutual.  You may remember that Ryan’s son Griffin was turned away and refused admission into Farrah’s funeral.  This snub was obviously the final straw in a relationship that has always been tumultuous.

Griffin O’Neal is suspicious of his father’s newfound devotion to Fawcett, telling Bennetts, “All those crocodile tears!… My dad’s only goal was to make sure he would be in the will. It was so disgustingly transparent as soon as he found out she was terminal. I consider him a vulture presiding over a carcass. Ryan thought he was going to get everything.” When asked about Griffin’s charge that Ryan was trying to get Fawcett’s money, the elder O’Neal says, “I hate him! He knows I have money. I made a tremendous amount of money on real estate, more than I deserve.”

O’Neal claims Griffin has sold salacious information about the family to the tabloids, a charge that Griffin denies–”Absolutely not! Not one thing!,” Griffin tells Bennetts. “My father is afraid of me because I know the truth,” Griffin says. “That’s the part that absolutely scares him to death.” Griffin suggests that the family’s problems might have something to do with the fact that Ryan plied his children with drugs–”My father gave me cocaine when I was 11 and insisted I take it,” he tells Bennetts–and was prone to uncontrollable rages. “He was violent all the way through my upbringing,” says Griffin. “He was a very abusive, narcissistic psychopath. He gets so mad he can’t control anything he’s doing.”

Ryan also is embroiled in battle with the woman he tried to hook up with — his daughter Tatum.

O’Neal fumes when asked about Tatum’s autobiography, saying “She wrote a book–bitch! How dare she throw our laundry in the street for money!… She didn’t call after Farrah’s show. She’ll have to explain that.”

Tatum tells Bennetts that her father “has every right to be angry about the book; no parent wants to hear their kid saying shitty things about them… But what I wrote in the book was true. I’ve got a battle with drugs, but I’m a strong, independent person, and I fight for myself, and my father and I butt heads. When I was 16 years old, he and Farrah moved in together, and after that I saw my dad periodically, and that took a long time for me to get over. Would I do that to my kids? No, but I don’t think Farrah was responsible for that. I truly thought Farrah was inspirational and beautiful and kind. Anyway, it’s past; I’ve moved on. I’m older now, and I forgive him.”

The whole, unedited disaster is in September’s Vanity Fair.  

What is the lesson here?  Appreciate the family you have, don’t do coke with your kids, go hug your folks and thank God that your last name isn’t O’Neal.

Farrah Fawcett’s Will: Ryan O’Neal Gets Nothing

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It has been revealed that Farrah Fawcett left the bulk of her estate, six million dollars, to her drug-addicted son Redmond.  The money is in a trust that will be doled out to him, hopefully to assist him in living a comfortable life without helping to support his habit.  Personally, I think any kind of allowance for a heroin addict who hasn’t accomplished a significant period of sobriety is a bad idea.

And though Fawcett was with Ryan O’Neal for almost 30 years, she didn’t make mention of or provisions for him.  No wonder he was trying to chase her from her death bed to the altar.  He was probably trying to secure a place in the will!

DENIED!!!

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While Farrah’s son, Redmond O’Neal, was allowed out of jail to attend his mother’s funeral, Ryan O’Neal’s other son Griffin (who is not Farrah’s child) was denied entry per Ryan’s request. If you remember, back in February ’07, Ryan was arrested for allegedly assaulting Griffin.

Griffin reportedly drove 300 miles to attend the funeral and pay his last respects to Farrah. “She’s mad right now that I’m not in there,” he said. “I just wanted to say goodbye to someone I knew and loved for 33 years.”

I know Ryan’s in a lot of pain right now, and I assume Griffin is probably a gigantic asshole, but is it right to deny someone access to a funeral like this?

Griffin stood outside the funeral (pictured above) with his wife Rima and daughter Dillan.