Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Cyndi Lauper

Cyndi Lauper Sang ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’ in an Airport Yesterday

No, Cyndi’s career isn’t hurting as bad as her face was a few weeks ago. The singer’s flight out of Buenos Aires was delayed yesterday, so she decided to treat the entire terminal to an a capella version of one of her biggest hits. She sounds good and her skin seems to have recovered (homegirl totally had a chemical peel. I’d put money on it,) and I’m pretty jealous of everyone there. Ending your vacation in Buenos Aires with a surprise Cyndi Lauper concert? Awesome.

Caption This: Cyndi Lauper’s Post-Spa Look

A photo of Cyndi Lauper

I know that girls just want to have fun, but we don’t always get what we want, now do we?

Right, but poor Cyndi recently “had a bad reaction to a spa treatment,” and this is what happened.  Can we talk about this for a hot minute?  Because I’ve never been to a spa (you might be surprised to know that spas aren’t that plentiful in the Appalachian region), but I would think the above look would be something you’d be more likely to see after a bad reaction to a fire or a bad reaction to being dropped headfirst into a vat of acid.  I mean, I know that some people get chemical peels and all that nonsense, but Cyndi looks like she’s about two steps away from being Skeletor, and I can’t imagine that’s listed in any spa treatment anywhere.

Can we use the comment section to talk about what would make a face look like this, why someone would want to do anything that left her face looking like this, and perhaps Skeletor?

Photo via The Daily Mail

Defying Sobriety


Lord, I love Cyndi Lauper, and I love this cause, but homegirl looks like what you’d get if Lisa Marie Presley had a baby with Lindsay Lohan’s coke mirror.

This is seriously tragic.

Cyndi showed up to Defying Inequality: The Broadway Concert in New York looking about 18 sheets to the wind. This woman can barely keep her eyes open. Her publicist never should have let her walk the carpet. Very very sad.

If you’d like to learn more about the concert, or donate to this very important equal rights cause, click here.

Cyndi Lauper Has a Helium Habit

Cyndi Lauper Sucks on Helium Before Performances

Oh, aging is such a sad process.

The saggy boobs. The flabby vagina. The menopause. The weight gain. The lowering of your annoyingly squeaky voice.

Fortunately, Cyndi Lauper’s found a cure for the last item.

Pop survivor Cyndi Lauper has one of the most unusual pre-performance warmups.

An amused source backstage at last week’s benefit for the Hetrick-Martin Institute said she sucked the gas out of two helium balloons, to create her trademark squeaky voice, before belting out hits like “Time After Time.”

Something tells me it’s not just before shows that this woman’s sucking on helium …