1Courtney Love Accuses Kermit The Frog of Rape

In other news, I’m fairly certain that that was the best headline I’ve ever had the pleasure of writing.

But back to the main story, which, of course, is that well-known crazy bitch, Courtney Love, does in fact believe that Kermit the Frog, as well as the rest of his lovable Muppets, are actually rapists. Really.

From TMZ:

Courtney Love believes Kermit the Frog and his gang of Muppet friends “raped” the memory of her late husband Kurt Cobain — by bastardizing Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” in their 2011 movie … without her permission.

Courtney says she has the absolute power to approve or nix the use of Kurt’s music for commercial purposes, and she never gave the OK for the 2 companies to use the song for the 2011 Muppets movie.

But there’s another side to this … We’re told Courtney sold off half of her rights to Kurt’s music to a company called Primary Wave Music. And there’s more … Courtney also gave Primary Wave the exclusive right to distribute Nirvana’s entire catalog.

As far as “Smells Like Teen Spirit” goes … not only did Primary Wave approve the use in the Muppet’s movie, they got permission from the two surviving Nirvana members –Dave Grohl and Krist Novoselic. And Dave is even in the movie.

But it’s not all that bad for Courtney. We’re told a chunk of the profits from songs in the catalog go to Courtney and her daughter, Frances Bean.

Now, we all know it’s not cool to throw around the word “rape” when you’re not actually talking about rape, right? That’s an established fact now? No one has any questions about that? Then let’s move right along.

Oh my goodness, the nerve of this woman. I know that she’s not exactly in the greatest health mentally, but come on now. “The Muppets raped the memory of Kurt Cobain,” was that really a thought that ever needed to exist in anyone’s head at all? I mean, did she forget that she gave a company the right to distribute Nirvana’s music? Did that just slip her mind? Besides, shouldn’t Dave Grohl and Krist Novoselic have more of a say in matters like these than Courtney does, since it’s their music we’re talking about here? Should I even be wasting my time trying to figure out the thought processes of Courtney Love?

I don’t know, I’m just too fired up about this. I just thought that The Muppets was such a beautiful gift to us all, and for Courtney to just spit in the face of these lovable creatures just blows my mind. It’s unnecessary, it bothers me, and I’m additionally bothered by being so bothered about someone speaking poorly of the Muppets. What is even happening?

Are any of you guys rolling your eyes as hard as I am over this whole thing?

March 14, 2012 at 7:30 am by Emily

4Courtney Love: “I Think of Myself as Sober”

Talking about Courtney Love is one of my very favorite things to do. Other favorite things to do include talking trash about Lea Michele and fawning over Evan Rachel Wood. But Courtney is a little different. With Courtney, I just like to discuss: no shit talking, no harsh words, just facts.

As much as I love to talk about Courtney Love, I love to hear her talk about herself even more. She’s just so … what’s the word I’m looking for … crazy? I think that’s it. And in a magical chain of events, Courtney Loved talked about herself to The Fix for a year, and then The Fix went and compiled all those interviews into a book. Let’s not waste time and get right to some excerpts, all right?

On being “sober”: “I think of myself as sober,” Love says, though she admits that her daily diet of prescription meds wouldn’t pass muster at an AA meeting. “When you’re used to heroin and cocaine, a few pills doesn’t seem like the end of the world. As they say in AA, it’s about progress, not perfection. I mean, abstinence is a nice idea, but I don’t know if it’s right for everyone. Especially for someone who was nursed on a steady diet of Valium and Ritalin from the time I was seven, thanks to my fine mother.”…[But] I’m not a junkie anymore. I’m an establishment woman, godammit! I’m a f*cking plutocrat! I’m fun, I’m sober, I’m fabulous! I have a few character defects, but I’m not dishonorable, and I’m not a liar. I have a good heart. There are a few things I do really well. I write good lyrics and sing. I love beautiful clothes and good music. I adore movies and acting. But unfortunately I suck at social graces. I lack a certain set of basic life skills, which is probably why I got into drugs in the first place. All I need is someone to give me a course in living.…When I was taking all the drugs, I just felt neutered and dull, like a nun. They helped get rid of all these uncomfortable feelings in my brain. So getting off drugs has made me feel really sexual and tender…like a 16-year-old virgin.”

As if that wasn’t enough, go ahead and click below so you can read more of Courtney’s beautiful words.

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February 1, 2012 at 3:30 pm by Emily

1Courtney Love Is Being Evicted for Being Trashy and Setting Fires

Courtney Love has this super fancy townhouse in New York. It was built in 1827, rent is $27,000 a month, and it was so impeccably decorated by interior designer Steven Gambrel that it was featured in Elle Decor and there was a special section in the lease that dictated that no changes should be made to the interior. Sounds pretty fancy, right?

Well, I’m sure it was before Courtney got a hold of it. According to the owner of the house, Donna Lyon, things have gone downhill since Courtney moved in around 10 months ago:

“Courtney has wallpapered and painted a large portion of the property without my consent. I learned about this when I wanted to sell the house and had photographs taken. They sent me the brochure and I said, ‘This can’t be my property.’ I came to New York to see it and I was horrified by what she had done. The walls that had been hand-painted and glazed were ruined, covered in damask wallpaper and ice-blue paint.”

In June, Love scorched her hands after a candle set a curtain on fire in the master bedroom. Lyon said, “I got a call from her accountant, who said, ‘Miss Love is fine,’ which I was glad to hear, but I thought, ‘What about the house?’ ”

Lyon said Love is currently $54,000 behind on the $324,000 annual rent. A court date has been set for Dec. 21 in Manhattan’s civil court.

Lyon’s lawyer, Norman Flitt of Rosenberg & Estis, said Love, “Has taken a historical house done by a recognized designer, and has taken upon herself to redecorate it. It Is tantamount to destroying a work of art.”

Oh, Courtney. I wish I could say that I expected more from you, but … well, you understand. I’m actually kind of proud that wallpapering your home, accidentally setting fire to it, and getting behind on rent is the extent of the problem here.

December 16, 2011 at 7:30 am by Emily

7If It’s a Day Ending in “Y,” We Have Photos of a Courtney Love Nipslip

I go back and forth with this bitch, I really do. Sometimes I think her overt sexuality could possibly be construed as sort of appealing, but mostly, I think it’s off-putting. Especially when I run into photos like this before breakfast. Then her overt sexuality puts me off lots of things, primarily like anything I have to swallow in order to digest. You know?

Jump in for Courtney’s semi-NSFW nipslip!

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November 23, 2011 at 5:30 am by Sarah

5I Apologize for Courtney’s Boobs So Early in the Morning

… But I consider it my civic duty to show you the things you’d probably rather not see: the nipples of Courtney Love, photos of Doug Hutchison dry humping a seventeen-year-old, Christina Aguilera looking all drunk and make-out-wasted and in a food coma … you get the gist.

I suppose it’s going to be one of those days, however – it’s not every morning that you get to start right out by checking out Courtney Love‘s tits. Enjoy!

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November 14, 2011 at 4:30 am by Sarah

1Courtney Love Explains The Romantic Beginnings of Her Relationship with Kurt Cobain

Settle in, everyone. Maybe grab a glass of wine, let your hair down, and slip into something more comfortable, because Courtney Love is about to regale us with the beautiful tale of the greatest romance of the twentieth century:

The first time Kurt and I slept together was at a Days Inn in Chicago. We were having our first postcoital moment, and we’re watching MTV and the video ["Smells Like Teen Spirit"] came on. I pulled away from him, because it was his video, his moment, he was the king of the f*cking world, and he put his arm around me and pulled me closer. Which was symbolic, like, “I’m letting you into my life.” That really endeared him to me. The next time I saw the video with him was at the Omni Northstar Hotel in Minneapolis. I’d flown there to f*ck Billy Corgan, who still had lots of hair. I didn’t even know Nirvana were playing that night. Kurt and I wound up at the Northstar, and our daughter, Frances, was basically made that night. “Smells Like Teen Spirit” was on MTV every five f*cking minutes.

So sweet, right? Did that story give you goosebumps too? My favorite was the part where they conceived Frances on the night that Courtney flew in to sex up Billy Corgan. What was yours?

October 12, 2011 at 5:30 pm by Emily