Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Chris Brown

Karma Calling: Chris Brown’s Probation Revoked, 4 Year Prison Sentence Could Happen

chris brown

Wait a second – do you hear that? That sweet melody of curses being screamed and walls being punched? Oh, that’s just Chris Brown reacting to Karma coming to collect what’s hers. That’s right: Breezy’s probation has been revoked, and he could be headed to prison for up to four years. Hallelujah, let heaven and nature sing, etc. A judge will decide his fate on August 16, when he heads back to court.

From TMZ:

That was quick — the judge just REVOKED

Chris Brown’s probation in the Rihanna beating case, but the singer will remain a free man … for now.

Brown showed up at court today to fight the L.A. County D.A.’s motion to revoke his probation in the wake of hit-and-run charges stemming from a car accident in May … but the judge granted the motion anyway, paving the way for a probation violation hearing in August.

If the judge determines Chris violated his probation, the singer could be sentenced to 4 years in prison.

In the meantime, Brown has been released on his own recognizance.

Is it wrong that I giggled like a schoolgirl reading that? Or maybe it was more cackling like a huamn being who loves seeing what goes around potentially coming back around. Come on, man – you can only fuck up so many times before you have to pay up. Hilariously, Chris took to Twitter to make an insane emotional plea for his fans to “pray” him out of this situation (that he put himself in, let me remind you) and claiming that he’s so burdened, etc. Fuuuuuuuuck this guy. God renounced that creation long ago.

Sorry, have to stop typing now. My eyes rolled too far back in my head and now I can’t see the screen.

OH SNAP: Did Rihanna Just Shut Down Chris Brown Via Instagram?

rihanna july 2013 instagram photo

Rihanna has been very fond of social media lately, using it to call out all her “haters”, from journalists to…well, your average online hater. But is she now using it to shut down the ultimate hater of all — Chris Brown? God I hope so.

Here’s what happened. Brown posted a tweet listing off collaborators on his upcoming album. Rihanna was mentioned, along with Nicki Minaj. Here’s the tweet:

chris brown twitter rihanna

Then, apparently not much later, Rihanna posted this on her Instagram:

rihanna instagram photo

(The line reads: “Bitch you will die, be born again, die again and be born again before I do a song with you bitch.”) Maybe Rihanna was offended that Chris Brown didn’t like her “twerking video.” Rihanna made a video of herself “twerking” to a Drake song and then posted it on Instagram. According to Hollywood Life, Brown saw it and was not impressed.

All he did was laugh at it, say, ‘wow,’ and shake his head.

I guess this means they’re really over — that is, if Rihanna intended for this to be about Chris Brown. Brown has not yet responded.

Thanks to Gossip On This for putting it all together.

Chris Brown Keeps F-cking Up

chris brown

Chris Brown, aside from the fact that he’s Chris Brown, has been running to a lot of problems lately. There’s the woman who alleged he beat her up, and now there’s the woman who alleged Brown pulled a hit and run. Remember when Brown hit a woman (with his car)? She’s claiming he gave her fake info when they pulled over. TMZ has the whole Chris Brown-y story.

Chris Brown has been charged with criminal hit-and-run … TMZ has learned.

We’ve learned the L.A. City Attorney has filed 2 criminal charges against Brown, in connection with a minor accident last month where Chris rear-ended a Mercedes and allegedly refused to fork over his driver’s license number and gave bogus insurance info and then left the scene.

The City Attorney has charged Chris with hit-and-run — for leaving the scene without exchanging proper information.  He’s also been charged with the crime of driving without a valid license.  The crimes are punishable by a maximum of 6 months in jail for each offense.

We’ve also learned the City Attorney will refer the matter to the L.A. County D.A. for a possible probation violation in the Rihanna beating case.  Worst case scenario — if the judge in that case concludes Chris broke the law and thereby violated his probation, he could be sentenced to prison for 4 years.

Brown tweeted about the ordeal.

chris brown twitter hit and run

Um…mark this shit on your calendars, because this is the first time I am going to agree with Chris Brown: if, in fact, he is telling the truth, then this is ridiculous. Were it any other celeb, I would be calling malarkey. But because it’s CB, and because he is a liar who f-cking sucks, I automatically give any one else the benefit of the doubt. But with this latest accusation and now this thing…guys…I don’t know. I still think Chris Brown is THE WORST, but maybe he didn’t f-ck this one up.

What do you think?

Let me make this clear: he still f-cking sucks, no matter what.

Surprise! Chris Brown Is Still Assaulting Women!

chris brown

Hey, you know how Chris Brown is totally reformed now and learned from his past mistakes and is really a decent guy who wants to make the world a better place now? SIKE! Only kidding. Instead of putting positivity into the world, he’s gone and assaulted a random woman at that Anaheim nightclub gig he did last weekend. Apparently he pushed 24-year-old Deanna Gines to the ground when they met in the VIP section and now she has torn knee ligaments. Of course, his rep Nicole Perna seems to be as much of an idiot as Chris himself, and said: “I’m unaware of the incident, as is Chris’s lawyer and his entire team. He was in a great mood after Powerhouse. None of this makes sense.”

Because, you know, you only assault people when you’re in a shitty mood?

Generally I would say that people like Gina are just thirsty for fame and easy money, but we’re talking about Chris Brown here, so all bets are off. To be fair, however, the club’s owner is also on Chris’ side and said that Gina was trying to “rush” Chris all night. Oh yeah, let me get a piece of that woman-beating piece of shit! Nothing like domestic violence, homophobia and a disgusting disregard for anyone but himself to get a lady’s loins purring.

From Gossip Cop:

Now, in a statement, Heat’s Mike Joher tells us, “Based on the information which we have gathered from our security company, mall security and other party goers which were at HEAT on Saturday night; It is apparent that the alleged incident regarding Chris Brown is false.”

Joher adds:
We know that the claimant was trying to jump on stage and security was doing their job by keeping people away from Chris. There was no way that he could have touched her, his section was roped off and he had heavy security surrounding him. Witnesses state that the she was persistently trying to rush Chris. She was eventually removed from the club.

While security was escorting her off the premises, she took off her shoes and threw them at our security. In addition, she continued to cause problems with mall security in the common area and parking lot. This type of behavior is not tolerated and is frowned upon. Our last resort was to contact police and have her arrested. However, we allowed her to leave with the people which accompanied her.

HEAT staff and security did what they had to, in order to ensure public safety and the safety of the artist. We have no reason to believe the allegations against Chris. He was a complete gentleman and remained professional throughout the entire night. Neither I, nor any of the witnesses we spoke to, saw him push or touch anybody. It is unfortunate that this matter has become an issue. These false allegations are tarnishing the venues reputation and is causing unnecessary problems for Chris Brown. HEAT will pursue legal ramifications for slandering our name and the artist. If you have any questions please feel free to contact me directly. Thank you.

Does Chris Brown have a stake in this club or what? Let’s give him the benefit of the doubt (though don’t ask me why) and say she’s lying. In a way it’s kind of like… so what? He’s always going to be “guilty” of being an angry, abusive, ignorant piece of shit and one incident being false certainly doesn’t erase that. Something doesn’t add up here – seems kind of random that a girl would injure herself and then blame Chris Brown, but “bitches be crazy”, as they say. WHO KNOWS? WHO CARES? I just want Chris Brown to go away. Forever.

Oh Ew: Someone Gave Chris Brown Their Panties At A Show

chris brown billboard awards

Chris Brown was given the gift of underwear at a performance at a nightclub in Anaheim last night. Oh, hey, you all may be sick of me using “LOL” but guess what? Chris Brown performing at a nightclub in Anaheim deserves a big fat f-cking LOL. I hope those are the only venues he’ll ever be able to play. I hope his transparent attempt at getting more fans doesn’t work, and I hope his biggest venue is an Arby’s parking lot.

Someone in the front row held out a pair of panties to Brown. A lot of people captured it on their cell phones and screamed in approval. There’s video but I just described the whole thing to you.

Whatever, I’d rather throw my undies at Lana Del Rey any day.

Chris Brown Says Back Off

chris brown crotch grab

Chris Brown is not going to back down when it comes to his inspirational graffiti art and this is  a problem for his neighborhood. He and Justin Bieber are regular hellions,  in terms of being dick neighbors, am I right? Okay, anyway, here’s the latest scoop from TMZ:

Chris Brown is firing back at the City of L.A. — claiming the gov. has NO RIGHT to force him to remove the graffiti art on the front of his L.A. home because it’s protected by the 1st Amendment.

Brown just filed an appeal with the city — telling officials the bill they’re trying to stick him with for having an “unpermitted” mural on the front wall of his Hollywood Hills home is pure B.S..

According to the legal documents, obtained by TMZ, Brown claims the city is wrongly trying to nail him for having an illegal “sign” — when the graffiti is art that “[enhances] the architectural and aesthetic features of the residential property.”

Translation — my artwork makes my house look dope, son!

Then Chris drops the constitutional bomb — arguing, “The murals are a reflection of [my] aesthetic taste and a reflection of free speech and expression protected by the First Amendment to the United States Constitution.”

Brown’s case is now in the hands of the Dept. of Building and Safety’s board of appeals — and if they shut him down, he can bring the fight to L.A. County Superior Court.

In fact, there’s a chance … albeit a small chance … that Brown’s case could go all the way up to the Supreme Court if he’s not willing to back down.

You know, I’m SO GLAD that Chris Brown is standing up for himself. Thank God, right?

Chris Brown Is a Gay Rights Activist Now

chris brown

Hold the phone! Chris Brown – infamous woman beater, gay hater and general piece of shit – has taken a stand against the injustices of homophobia and stepped out as a supporter of gay rights and “ethnic minorities” in the hopes of changing the world. LOL! I can’t with this asshole. Anyhow, he’s going to do this by… releasing a song. If you’re as confused by the logic as I am, let’s let Chris explain it himself, shall we?

Uh, first of all, you’re not an inspiration to anyone, unless you count yourself as an inspiration not to be a total dickhead like you. Second of all, the single he’s referring to is widely believed to be a song called ‘They Don’t Know’, which will have vocals from… Aaliyah. She’s rolling over in her grave, as you can imagine.

I can’t with any of this. Why won’t he go away?